SLEEPING BEAUTY – A “clued-up” Army Wife’s Mantra for Wining and Dining in and out of Uniform

I have just finished reading SOLDIER AND SPICE (An Army Wife’s Life) by Aditi Mathur Kumar 

It is a delightful book – witty yet insightful.

I loved the peppy writing style, which keeps you in splits, engrossed from start to finish. 

The book has great Page Turning Quality (PTQ) and once you start reading it, the book is “unputdownable”, and I read it in one sitting.

Reading this hilarious story of an army wife reminded me of an unforgettable army wife who I had nicknamed “Sleeping Beauty”.

So, let me delve into my Humour in Uniform Archives and pull out this anecdote about “Sleeping Beauty” for you:

(Of course, I can’t match Aditi’s scintillating writing style, so you will have to bear with my rather prosaic and prolix rambling...)

SLEEPING BEAUTY 

A “clued-up” Army Wife’s Mantra for Wining and Dining in and out of Uniform

Unforgettable Memories of my Navy Life

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

There are two kinds of military wives.

The first category comprises “clued-up” military wives:

1. Ladies who are aware of life in the military – girls who come from a military background, daughters of military officers, or girls who have seen the life of a military wife from close quarters as they have a relative or friend in the military or they know someone married to a military man, or because they have lived in the proximity of a military cantonment and are acquainted with the lifestyle. 

Nowadays, with the increasing number of “marriages in uniform”, you even have military wives who are serving military officers who are “know-it-all” on matters military.

There is a second category of newly married military wives:

2. Ladies who have had absolutely no exposure to military life – and hence these young naive and innocent girls are completely oblivious of the unique military culture and are totally unaware of the kind of social life a military wife has to lead.

“Sleeping Beauty” belonged to the second category.

She did not have a clue about army life.

She was born in a family of academicians and brought up in the tranquil environment of a university campus in a small town.

Since it was not a military town, the only persons she saw in uniform were the odd NCC officers on the university campus.

Of intellectual bent of mind and possessing an academic nature herself, she was pursuing her Ph. D. when there was a marriage proposal for her from an army officer Captain “X”.

Things moved fast, and suddenly she found herself married to Captain “X” and arrived with her newly wedded husband at the SP Marg Officers Mess in New Delhi.

In fact, it was in the same week that I arrived with my newly wedded wife at the same SP Marg Officers Mess in New Delhi, where we, Captain “X” and I, were living as happy bachelors for about one year, before we got married, in the same month, almost on the same day.

In those good-old “pre-jointmanship” days, the SP Marg Officers Mess was an inter-service combined Army-Navy Officers Mess, like Kota House.

But the happy situation, of bonhomie and camaraderie, did not last forever, since a few years later, in an act of “jointmanship”, the Army evicted Naval Officers from the SP Marg Officers Mess, and, in a retaliatory gesture of “jointmanship”, the Navy evicted all Army Officers from the Kota House Officers Mess.

Even today, as I hark back, I fondly cherish my glorious days at SP Marg Officers Mess, the atmosphere of bonhomie in the evenings when we all sat together on the lawns or in the bar enjoying our drinks.

During my SP Marg days, I made friends with a number of army officers – and one of my good friends from the army was Captain “X”.

On New Year’s Eve, we sat at the DSOI, downing peg after peg of rum, and suddenly we decided that we both had endured enough of bachelorhood and it was time to get married.

Within six months, we, “X” and I, were sitting together with our newly-wedded wives on the lawns of SP Marg Officers Mess.

Soon, we shifted to Curzon Road Apartments, and we were next door neighbours.

Our erstwhile mess-mates from SP Marg would invariably “bounce” us, whenever they were in the vicinity at Connaught Place or India Gate.

These bachelor officers would suddenly land up unannounced any time of the day and night, demanding food and drink – sometimes even at the oddest of hours, like on their way back from a late night movie show.

These impromptu food and booze sessions, which lasted till the wee hours of the morning, came as a big surprise for “Sleeping Beauty” who was used to the placid social life of a small town university campus where “early to bed, early to rise” was the norm.

Having never seen even a drop of alcohol in her parents’ home, these unrestrained drinking binges, where everyone consumed enormous amounts of alcohol and many officers got high and behaved with wild abandon, caused her even greater cultural shock.

However, she adapted herself to her new life, and to compensate for the sleep deprivation due to the late nights by sleeping during the day – hence I gave her the nickname: “Sleeping Beauty”.

One evening, around 7 PM, on my way to my flat, I saw “Sleeping Beauty” eating her dinner.

(Those of you who have lived in Curzon Road Apartments will know that the Kitchenette of the one room flat was located at the entrance, which opened in a corridor – and we mostly kept the door open for cross-ventilation).

So, as I walked down the corridor to my flat, I saw “Sleeping Beauty” standing before the gas stove with a plate in her hand.

The plate was filled with generous amounts of a variety of dishes and she was merrily eating away.

“Having dinner so early?” I asked her.

“No. No. I am just tasting the food to see it is okay,” she said.

“Tasting? So much?” I asked, pointing towards her filled plate.

She laughed, and said: “Okay. I will tell you. My husband has invited his boss and all the officers in his office and their wives for dinner. By the time they finish their drinks and have dinner it will be past midnight and I will feel very hungry by then. So, I am having my dinner now itself.”

“You are eating your dinner now itself, even before the guests arrive?” I asked her, flabbergasted.

“Yes. I am going to have my full meal – even the sweet dish. Then it doesn’t matter how long they keep drinking and whatever time they eat their food. I will have a second round of food with them just to keep up appearances, or maybe I will be a bit hungry by then,” she said.

I marveled at the earthy wisdom of the young bride – it was so breathtaking in its simplicity – a useful mantra for all hostesses, especially for military wives who have to entertain a lot.

I will always thank “Sleeping Beauty” for this pointer for hostesses, which I suggested to my wife and many ladies.

In fact, I started following Sleeping Beauty’s mantra myself once I joined the ranks of teetotallers who anxiously wait for dinner to be served while the boozers keep endlessly downing drink after drink.

So, if you are “fauji” wife, whenever you invite people for dinner, you know what to do.

Happy Wining and Dining in Uniform!

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

 

Did you like this article?

I am sure you will like the 27 short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html

COCKTAIL ebook

If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramkarve@hotmail.com

Twitter: @vikramwkarve

      

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

First Posted by me Vikram Karve in this blog at 6/16/2014 02:15:00 PM at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/06/humor-in-uniform-sleeping-beauty-and.html

HAPPINESS FACADE

HAPPINESS FACADE

An apocryphal story

By

VIKRAM KARVE

A certain man made an appointment to see a renowned psychological counsellor.

He duly arrived at the psychotherapist’s clinic and said to him, “Sir, please help me. I always feel depressed. No matter what I do, I always feel depressed and dejected. I just do not know what to do.”

The counsellor looked at the depressed man and said to him, “Come with me to the window.”

The patient followed the therapist to the window. 

The counsellor pointed outside and said, “Do you see that huge tent over there in the distance?”

“Yes, I can see that tent,” the depressed man answered.

“Well, that is a circus tent. 

In that tent there is a circus and it is really good. 

There are lots of acts to watch, especially the clown acts. 

And there is one clown in particular who is extremely funny. 

He wears all sorts of costumes and masks and performs hilarious antics. 

His masquerade acts are really fantastic. 

He will make you rock with side-splitting laughter over and over again. 

Go to the circus and see that cheerful clown perform and I guarantee you that your depression will disappear,” the psychotherapist advised the depressed man.

The depressed man turned to the counsellor and he looked at the counsellor with sadness in his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” the counsellor asked the depressed man.

The depressed man said: “Sir, I am that same circus Clown...!”

MORAL OF THE STORY

What does the story of THE “HAPPY” CLOWN tell us?

While judging  human beings one must not rely on external appearance alone. 

On the surface a person may look cheerful, calm and composed but deep inside he may be suffering from inner turmoil. 

Many persons who outwardly always joke and laugh may actually be quite unhappy and depressed deep inside.

Outward cheerfulness may be a way to mask inner unhappiness.

Like the clown in the story, a person makes others happy is sometimes sad himself. 

Maybe your effort at making others happy creates stress and depression within you.

So, why wear a “mask”?

Why hide your true emotions under a mask, especially the mask of happiness.

Why not be genuine in displaying your true emotions?

Why not laugh when you want to laugh and cry when you want to cry? 

Why hide your inner emotions?

Why suppress your true feelings?

Why put on an act for the outside world?

Why put on a fake smile when you are angry or unhappy?

Why fake it?

Why try to “manage” your image? 

Does all this not cause enormous stress within you? 

Won’t the constant masquerade of Image Management adversely affect your health in the long run?

Should you not beware of the dangers of “Image Management”?

Do you want to be like the “Happy” Clown?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

MILITARY WIVES - THE NAVY WIFE - LADY LIKE QUALITIES (LLQ)

MILITARY WIVES

LADY LIKE QUALITIES (LLQ)

THE NAVY WIFE

Here is quote from a NWWA (Navy Wives Welfare Association) booklet which encapsulates some prudent advice for Navy Wives:

“You don't wear his (husband’s) stripes ... there is no such thing as a ‘Senior Wife’. There are Senior Officers. They have wives. There are Junior Officers and some of them have wives. All wives are ladies ... You will not fawn over others and not expect others to fawn over you. You will be yourself. And your own manners, breeding and natural charm will shine through leaving you with no need for any borrowed stripes or other borrowed plumage”

I have seen many such elegant navy wives who were perfect ladies – military wives who had excellent LADY LIKE QUALITIES or LLQ

Do tell us if you have seen ladies with perfect LLQ?

ARE YOU A LADY - ARE YOU A GENTLEMAN

ARE YOU A GENTLEMAN (or A LADY)?

Musings

By

VIKRAM KARVE

This morning, while tidying my bookcase and bookshelves and cleaning my books, I browsed through my old diaries which I have preserved with great care.

During my student days, and even later, during my working days, I always carried around a diary and jotted down anything I found interesting – anything I read or heard or saw that appealed to me.

From time to time I will share with you in my blog some jottings from my “ancient” diaries.

DEFINITION OF A GENTLEMAN

Today I will talk about the definition of the word “gentleman” which I jotted down while attending a lecture during a leadership workshop in the year 1992.

But before we get to the definition, let us ponder a bit on the meaning of the word “gentleman”.

(Though written for the masculine gender GENTLEMAN this applies to the feminine gender LADY as well)

WHO IS A GENTLEMAN ?

If you look at the concept of “gentleman” in an holistic manner, a gentleman comprises two aspects:

1. Form

2. Substance

FORM ATTRIBUTES

Form refers to the external “image management” or “personality development” aspects – visible behaviour and outward appearance – traits like poise, grooming, manners, etiquette, dress, accent, diction, speech, smartness, courteousness, elegance, style, refinement, sophistication and polished behaviour.

In the Navy, or in the Army, Air Force, Military and Civil Services, an Officer is trained in these aspects which are called OLQ or “Officer Like Qualities” when he joins service at various training academies.

In the civvy street there are Finishing Schools, Image Management Trainers and Personality Development Coaches who help inculcate in people the “form” attributes of a gentleman.

But form alone does not make a gentleman.

A true gentleman must have both form and substance.

Form is important but it is the substance which establishes the true worth of a man.

A man possessing only form but no substance is a phoney gentleman and we see many such fake charlatans masquerading as gentlemen.

We saw what is meant by “form”.

Now let us see what is meant by “substance”.

SUBSTANCE ATTRIBUTES

Form consists of external visible attributes.

Substance comprises invisible internal virtues.

Here is a definition which defines the substance of a gentleman.

A gentleman is:

“An honest man, a man with a sense of duties and obligations of his position, whatever it may be, a man who tells the truth, a man who gives others their due, a man considerate to the weak, a man who has principles and stands by them, a man who is not elated by good fortune and not too depressed by bad luck, a man who is loyal, a man who can be trusted”

The real virtues of a gentleman are inherent in the above definition.

Whether civilian or military, an Officer is considered a Gentleman.

But, tell me, in the context of the definition above, how many officers truly possess all the attributes enunciated in the definition above?

Image Management, Personality Development and Social Standing can give you “form”.

But it is your “substance” which will make you a complete and genuine gentleman.

If you look around you in urban society, you will find so many persons who look like gentlemen (as they exhibit the requisite “form”). 

But when you look more closely, even at high ranking officers and those way up on the social pecking order, you will discover:

1. who are the genuine men of “substance” 

and 

2. who are masquerading as gentlemen.

You may be an officer, but are you a gentleman?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 

Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review. 

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

NB:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013 all rights reserved

Did you like this blog post?

I am sure you will like the 27 short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html

COCKTAIL ebook

If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramkarve@hotmail.com

Twitter: @vikramkarve

      

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

THE ART OF SYCOPHANCY

THE ART OF SYCOPHANCY

A Mulla Nasrudin Teaching Story

Retold By 

VIKRAM KARVE

This is Part 3 of the series on Yesmanship and Crony Leadership

Continued from:

Part 1: YES-MEN AND CRONY LEADERSHIP

and

Part 2: THE ART OF YESMANSHIP

Mulla Nasrudin had become a favourite of the King. 

He was a part of his inner circle and was always seen hanging around the king with the coterie of sycophants. 

In fact, Mulla Nasrudin had become the Chief Sycophant to the King.

One day the King was very hungry.

Mulla Nasrudin rushed to the palace kitchen and saw some cooked brinjals so he immediately served the brinjals to the King.

The brinjals had been so deliciously cooked that the King loved the taste and relished them so much that he told the Palace Cook to serve brinjals every day at every meal.

“Are brinjals not the best vegetables in the world?” the King asked Mulla Nasrudin.

“Very Right, Your Majesty, Very Right. Yes, Brinjals are the very best vegetables in the world. You are absolutely right, your Majesty. The brinjal is the tastiest vegetable in the world,” Nasrudin said, in total agreement with the King, “As you desire, your majesty, I will ensure that brinjals are served every day at every meal.”

Five days later, when brinjals had been served for the tenth meal in succession, the King who was by now fed up of eating brinjals roared in anger: “Take these brinjals away! They taste terrible! I hate them!”

“Absolutely right, your Majesty, brinjals are the worst vegetables in the world,” agreed Nasrudin.

On hearing this the King was quite bewildered, and with a bemused look on his face he asked Mulla Nasrudin, “I don't understand. Now you say that brinjals are the worst vegetables in the world, but just a few days ago you said that brinjals were the very best vegetables in the world.”

“I did, your Majesty. But I am the servant of the King, not of the vegetable,” replied Mulla Nasrudin ingratiatingly.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013

Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work. 

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Did you like this story?

I am sure you will like the 27 short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html

COCKTAIL ebook

If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramwamankarve@gmail.com

      

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.