Sunday, July 14, 2013


Sunday Afternoon Musings

If you travel on a road which others have built – then you will reach the destination where the road goes and you will reach the the destination they want you to reach.

It is true, isn’t it?

Since others have built the road on which you travel, you will reach the destination which the road-builders want you to reach.

In a metaphorical sense, it is the same with the journey of life too.

If you let others plan your life – then you will reach the “destination” which they want you to reach.

That is why you must plan your own life according to the “destination” or goal that you want to reach.

Unfortunately, it is easier said than done.

It all starts when you are small, too young to understand things, too immature to formulate your life goal.

The moment you enter school, your parents decide what they want you to achieve – the “destination” they want you to reach – and start planning your life accordingly.

Your teachers play a role in this too.

And you are quite clueless to understand anything.

It happened with me too.

In Class 9, I was put in the “Science” Stream.

No one asked me my choice, because probably I was considered too young to make a choice.

In our school, there was a simple rule – only those “weak” in mathematics were sent to the “Arts” Stream.

And, unfortunately, I was good at Maths.

Sometimes, it is a great misfortune to be good at something you don’t like.

Later, my parents, teachers and “well-wishers” decided that I must appear for the IIT JEE.

I cleared the JEE, studied Engineering, got a B. Tech. degree, and reached the destination they wanted me to reach. 

The same thing happened during most of my working life too.

It was others who did my career planning and I kept “travelling” on the “path” they planned for me and I duly reached the “destinations” they wanted to me to reach.

It was only after retirement that I had the luxury of planning my own life according to the goals I wanted to reach.

No longer do I have to “travel” on roads that others have built for me.

No longer am I reaching “destinations” that others want me to reach.

Now, I am my own master.

I decide my goal, I plan my life, and I “build” my own road towards the “destination” that I want to reach.

I trust things have changed now and young children are being given greater independence to decide their own destiny.

I really don’t know, so you tell me.

Are young children being given the freedom to plan their own lives?

Or are parents still planning the lives of their children and making them “travel” on roads towards “destinations” that the parents want their children to reach?

Or are some parents trying to achieve their own unrealized goals vicariously through their children?

If you are a young student, remember that you have to plan your own life according to the goal you want to reach.

If you let others plan your life – then you will reach the “destination” they want you to reach.

And once you have travelled too far down the wrong road, it becomes difficult to turn back and you are left with no choice but to continue travelling till you reach the wrong “destination”.

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work. 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
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Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013 all rights reserved

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A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

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Unknown said...

Agree, but at younger age kids do not know what they want? How they can choose their own destination & build their own road?
Some may say guide them but not to force the decision. But as a parent how to make sure that we are ONLY guiding/helping them just to choose their own destination not forcing decision itself? How to make sure we do not cross the thin line between imposing decision & guiding to make decision? In my view that's the MOST difficult part.


Vikram Waman Karve said...

@ Manoj
You have a point - children do not know what they really want.
So it is best to let them discover for themselves.