Re-Building “Bridges” with Navy Veterans – Navy Foundation Pune – “Alumni Association” for Navy Veterans in Pune

This Sunday (21 January 2018) – we have a Navy Foundation Pune Charter (NFPC) Meet at Peacock Bay hosted by the Naval Officers of NDA in the beautiful environs of the Naval Training Team “Wardroom” on the banks the picturesque Khadakwasla Lake. 

We have NFPC meets once in 3 months – every quarter – and normally – the Winter Meet is held at Peacock Bay – the post-monsoon meet is held at in the verdant environment of INS Shivaji Lonavala (a “stone frigate” – the premier technical training establishment of the Navy) – and – the other two meets are held at convenient locations in Pune. 

Dear Reader: This prompts me to tell you a bit about the Navy Foundation – so – let me update an article I had written a few years ago and post it for you to read...

RETIREMENT BLUES 

Re-Building “Bridges” with the Navy

By

VIKRAM KARVE

Before retirement – when I was in the Navy – there was no dearth of friends. 

After retirement – I have zero friends.

I am talking of “offline” friends.

Yes – I do have a large number of online friends – and – even my erstwhile Navy Friends have now become online friends. 

In Pune – all my Navy Friends – after retirement – live in remote Military Veteran “ghettos” (so-called “exlusive” residential projects for retired defence personnel) – and – these elite “ghettos” are located in the suburbs of Pune – on the opposite side of town from where I live – and – in view of the terrible Pune traffic – I don’t have the energy to drive 30 kms across town and back – except on special occasions.

And – one such special occasion is the Navy Foundation Pune Charter (NFPC) Meet – which is held once in 3 months.

I make sure I attend all NFPC Meets – of course – to meet my Navy Buddies – and also – to enjoy the stimulating PLD followed delicious lunch. 

Now – I look forward to the meet on Sunday at Peacock Bay on the banks of Khadakwasla Lake near Pune.

Meanwhile – here is a piece I wrote on the Navy Foundation a few years ago.

NAVY FOUNDATION PUNE 

The “Alumni Association” for Navy Veterans in Pune

By

VIKRAM KARVE

If you are a Naval Officer – after retirement – it is best to settle down in Mumbai – which is the premier Navy Station – or – in a coastal city like Visakhapatnam (Vizag), Kochi, Chennai, Kolkata, Goa etc where there is a Naval presence – or – even in Delhi/NCR – where the mighty “Northern Naval Command” is located.

This is because if you settle down in a landlocked place like Pune after you retire from the Navy – you tend to “burn your bridges” with your erstwhile service.

The only redeeming grace is the Indian Navy Foundation – a purely social organization set up to facilitate fraternal relations between retired naval officers.

Luckily – the Navy Foundation has a “chapter” (aka “charter”) at Pune 

Membership is voluntary – and I am glad I became a member, because the quarterly Navy Foundation Pune Chapter (NFPC) meetings are the best occasions for meeting and renewing bonds with my former navy buddies.

Whenever I go for these NFPC get-togethers I feel something like a  “Yossarian”  of  Catch-22 who is one of the most frequent visitors to the officers’ club that he had not help build.

I am sure you have read Catch-22.

Let me “jog” your memory about this hilarious yet insightful episode about Yossarian and the Officers’ Club in Pianosa.

In something akin to “Shramdan” – officers are encouraged to build their own clubs. 

(If you have served in the Military – you would be familiar with “Shramdan”)

However – Yossarian, who is proud of his ability to avoid work, contributes nothing to help build the club – he does not go for even a single day to work on building the officers’ club.

But once the officers’ club is ready, Yossarian visits the club almost every day and makes maximum use of the facilities, which he had not helped build.

Let me quote a paragraph from Catch-22 which encapsulates this sentiment (emphasis mine):

“Actually there were many officers’ clubs that Yossarian had not helped build – but he was proudest of the one on Pianosa. 

It was a sturdy and complex monument to his powers of determination. 

Yossarian never went there to help until it was finished – then he went there often – so pleased was he with the large, fine, rambling shingled building. 

It was a truly splendid building – and – Yossarian throbbed with a mighty sense of accomplishment each time he gazed at it – and reflected that – none of the work that had gone into it was his...”

For me – like Yossarian – it is a similar equation with the NFPC – “effort-wise – I contribute nothing” – but I participate in all get-togethers most enthusiastically.

We had two excellent NFPC get-togethers in Lonavala – wonderful days – like picnics – a nostalgic walk down memory lane for many navy veterans who reminisced about their halcyon training days at this picturesque location. 

We also had a memorable meet at Peacock Bay on the shores of Khadakvasla Lake near the National Defence Academy (NDA) – hosted by Commandant NDA. 

On 29 Jan 2017 – we had another meet at the same picturesque venue and the hospitality, entertainment and food surpassed the previous meet. 

At all these meets – the distinctive Naval efficiency, superlative hospitality and caring courtesy shown to us during the visit demonstrated how much young naval officers and sailors genuinely care for its veterans.

When I was in service – I remember us hosting a get-together of Navy Foundation at IAT Pune at the Naval Jetty (Sailing Club) on the banls of Khadakwasla Lake – sometime in the 1990’s.

In Pune – the favourite venue for NFPC Meets is Atlantis

Sadly – there is no Navy Wardroom (Officers Mess) or Navy Institute/Club in Pune.

And – in the past – officer-bearers of NFPC have had harrowing experiences running from pillar to post trying to negotiate the red tape while dealing with the Army to get other Military Venues for NFPC Meets.

So – thanks to “jointmanship” demonstrated by the “pongos” – the officebearers found it more convenient to organise Navy Foundation Meetings in Pune at ATLANTIS – which is conveniently located – and much more flexible to deal with – with zero red tape – and better off in all respects – especially food-wise and ambience-wise. 

Of course – some officers of the “old-mould” insisted that the meets be held in a Service Mess – so – a meet was held in the Army Sub Area Officers Mess – but – the ambience and food was not as good as Atlantis.

The best thing about these Navy Veteran Meets is the egalitarian atmosphere – with a total absence of the rank consciousness one sees while in service – since – after retirement – all veterans are civilians – equal in status – and now – instead of rank – it is age that is respected.

As I said earlier – after retirement – our only connection with the Navy is the Navy Foundation – and Navy Veterans look forward to NFPC meetings where you can bond, interact and network with your erstwhile navy buddies while regaling each other with delightful anecdotes of the “good old days”.

If you are a Navy Veteran Officer in Pune – I look forward to meeting you at the next Navy Foundation Pune Charter Lunch Meet on 21 January 2018 at Peacock Bay.

If you are an Indian Navy Veteran Officer – in or around Pune – please be there.

NAVY FOUNDATION 

How the Indian Navy Foundation for Veteran Navy Officers was Born

Maybe – for the benefit of Navy Veterans who do not know about the genesis of Navy Foundation – it would be a good idea to share an interesting article by a distinguished erstwhile Navy Chief Admiral JG Nadkarni on the Navy Foundation for Veteran Indian Navy Officers.

I came across this article on the website of the Navy Foundation Mumbai Charter at url: http://www.navyfoundationmumbaicharter.in/birth_of_the_foundation.html 

I am posting it below for your convenience to read.

Birth of The Foundation by Adm JG Nadkarni

The idea was Ram Tahiliani’s. He had just returned from an official trip to the United States. Whilst there, he had been greatly impressed by the Veterans’ organisation in that country. I was his Vice Chief. After returning he asked me if a similar organisation could be started for the Indian Navy in India. I was told to look into it and come up with a proposal.

We examined it from all angles. To be effective it would have to be a Naval Headquarters’ baby. It would have to be fully supported by the Navy in all aspects. At the same time each Unit would have to be totally autonomous. Naval Ex-servicemen are notoriously touchy. Having been subjected to orders all their lives they are averse to be dictated again now that they have retired. Moreover some of the officers were very senior and had to be handled and treated with respect. Anyway, we decided to go ahead and institute an organisation for all Ex-servicemen under the patronage of Naval Headquarters.

We considered many options for a suitable name. It had to be unique and easily acceptable. Such names like “Navy League”, “Navy Association” were considered and rejected for one reason or another. Finally, we hit upon the idea of “Navy Foundation”, which was unanimously accepted.

Various models lay before us. The Indian Air Force has an “Air Force Association” which is open to all Air Force personnel. Somehow we felt that this would not be suitable for us. The class system is still prevalent in India and we had seen what happened in some of the Air Force-Navy housing schemes. We decided that the Navy Foundation should be only for the retired officers of the Indian Navy.

It is one thing to start a body and quite another to make it work. There were already in existence various well established organisations started by retired naval officers. There was the "Navy League" in New Delhi, another body called the "Anchor Hold" in Bombay. In Pune there was the "Retired Naval Officers' Association". These were thriving organisations, who met regularly, had activities, bank accounts, Presidents and Chairmen who were reluctant to give up their positions, dissolve the bodies and join the Navy Foundation.

During the next two months I visited various places, held meetings with their members and tried to convince them that joining the Navy Foundation would be beneficial. Most bodies were reluctant at first. Their biggest worry was that Naval Headquarters would start dictating terms and they would end up being one more directorate of NHQ. I convinced them that each body would be totally autonomous and except for one annual meeting there would not be any interference by the Navy in their day to day functioning. Moreover, NHQ would act as the go between with the Government for various problems faced by Ex-servicemen.

One by one the organisations started seeing reason and decided to merge themselves with the Navy Foundation. Some refused and exist even today as parallel organisations. In Pune Admiral Soman headed the Retired Naval Officers' Association. He readily agreed and was very enthusiastic. In Bombay the association was headed by Commodore Chatterji. He was reluctant at first and took a lot of persuasion but agreed eventually. I am really happy that the original assurance given by us has been meticulously observed by the Navy. There has been no interference, dictating or coercion on these groups.

The next phase was to start "Charters" in various areas where retired naval officers had settled in large numbers. Such Charters were started in New Delhi, Mumbai, Chennai, Bangalore, Pune, Kochi and Calcutta. Later more Charters were added.

I realized that to really get the Charters going, some assistance from Naval Headquarters would be necessary. Commands were persuaded to make a room available as offices for each Charter. In November 1987, I took over as CNS. I decided that the funds raised in the Navy Ball of 1987 would be distributed to various Charters as seed money for initial financial assistance. We raised nearly Rs. 7 lakhs in that Navy Ball and this money was distributed. Rs 1.5 lakh each to big Charters and Rs. 1 lakh to small Charters.

In 1987, when I was the VCNS we started a magazine called "Quarterdeck" for Ex-servicemen. We roped in then Commander Uday Bhaskar, the Navy PRO and the late Tappi Koppikar to be the first joint editors. Its first issue was a roaring success. It won a prize for the best magazine in its category. On the establishment of the Navy Foundation it became official magazine. Successive editors have improved and embellished it. It is distributed far and wide and veterans look forward to each issue.

During my travels around the country and meetings with naval veterans, I had realized that all servicemen have problems about their welfare, pay, pensions etc. Many of these had landed on my desk when I was COP and a full time body was required to deal with these. When I decided to establish a full time directorate to deal with ex-servicemen's problems and feed them with current happenings in the Navy. Each year we held a get-together of ex-CNSs and other officers and gave them briefings on operations, personnel and other aspects of the Navy. Today the Directorate of Ex-servicemen's Affairs is doing excellent work and acts as a conduit between the veterans and NHQ.

The first annual meeting was held in NHQ under my chairmanship and a constitution was approved. We were able to clear many apprehensions and doubts about the Foundation.

Today, the Navy Foundation is a going body and Charters are well established.

Today, the Navy Foundation is a successful and dynamic organisation. Various Charters are doing excellent work in keeping alive the bonds and camaraderie established during our time in the Navy. There is a total absence of rank consciousness or hierarchy. They have regular get-togethers, illuminating lectures and picnics. Many establish bodies to help widows. The Mumbai Charter has even got a marriage bureau for children of Ex-servicemen!

Ram Tahiliani would be happy that his dream of 1987 has now become a reality...!!! 

-----------------------------------------------------------

Bye for now.

If you are an Indian Navy Veteran Officer – in or around Pune – I look forward to meeting you at the forthcoming Navy Foundation Pune Charter Lunch Meet on Sunday 21 January 2018 at Peacock Bay. 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This post is an abridged updated consolidated extract of my articles earlier posted by me at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/10/navy-foundation-pune-alumni-association.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/retirement-blues-burning-bridges-with.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/navy-veterans-meets-re-building-bridges.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/03/navy-foundation-pune-alumni-association.html 

HOW TO HAVE FUN WHILE TALKING - ENJOYING CONVERSATION PLAYING STATUS GAMES

HOW TO HAVE FUN WHILE TALKING

ENJOYING CONVERSATION PLAYING STATUS GAMES

Musings

By

VIKRAM KARVE

When I was in the Navy I had to attend many official parties and social occasions.

On most occasions I knew many persons and we enjoyed talking freely about topics of common interest.

However, there were some occasions, especially when I was “detailed” as a “rep” to attend formal inter-service parties or social functions in the civilian world where I hardly knew anybody.

What do you do when you land up in a place where you are a stranger and nobody is keen to talk to you.

1. You can get bored all by yourself and wait for the “torture” to end.

2. You can try to strike up a polite conversation about some mundane topic like the weather with someone who is not interested in talking to you.

3. You can have fun talking to people and enjoy yourself (and maybe the person you are conversing with will enjoy the tête-à-tête too).

Before I tell you how, let’s get back to the basics.

AIM OF CONVERSATION

Why do we talk to people?

Why do people talk to each other?

Why do we converse?

Conversation is a medium of verbal communication.

The professed aim of conversation is to exchange information.

However conversation may have an ulterior motives too.

Sometimes you may speak to “get it off your chest” or to express emotions like happiness or anger.

Another reason for you to converse with someone may to establish the “pecking order” or to alter, raise or lower, your “status” relative to the other person.

Thus, to put it in a nutshell, there are three reasons for verbal communication:

1. Exchanging Information

2. Expressing Emotions

3. Determining and Altering Status

DETERMINING AND ALTERING STATUS BY CONVERSATION

Let us discuss the third reason for conversation: Determining and Altering Status.

Consciously, or sub-consciously, people are competing with each other for status when they speak to each other. 

Different individuals have different attitudes towards status.

Some are blatant about flaunting their status while others do so in a more subtle manner.

Some like to establish their superior status while others prefer to tone down their own status relative to the other person.

Let me give you some examples of Determining Status:

If a stranger asks you where you live, he may not be doing so for mere information, he may be doing it for ascertaining or establishing relative status.

“Where do you live?”

“Wakad.” (a middle-class suburb of Pune)

“Oh. I live on Boat Club Road.” (the most posh locality of Pune)

A snooty wife of a navy colleague once asked me at a party in the presence of others:

“In which school do your children study?”

“Kendriya Vidyalaya,” I answered.

“Oh. My children study in xxx School,” she said with an upturned nose, taking the name of a most elite school which was known more for its snob appeal than academic achievements.

In the first example the person did not know where I lived and was trying to “gauge my status” in comparison with his own.

In the second example the lady knew where my children studied and was trying to show-off her “higher” status as compared to other naval officers and families.

In the civilian world status is determined by material things like your wealth, the car you own, the locality where you stay, the school your children attend, or who you know.  

Where you work also determines your status. Working for a prestigious organisation adds to your status.

Your intellectual accomplishments, the institution where you studies, an ivy league college, IIT or IIM, also contribute to your status.

In the defence forces your material wealth and intellectual accomplishments do not matter.

In the army and navy your status is determined by your rank – yes, Rank is the only factor which determines your place in the pecking order in the military.

That is why your military rank is prefixed to your name, even after you retire.

The army and navy are highly status-conscious organisations.

Rank (or the rank of your spouse) governs social graces in the services.

That is why most senior officers (and their wives) will immediately state their rank so that they can assume a higher status.

However, on occasions, I have observed some senior officers not mentioning their ranks while talking “incognito”. They make efforts to deliberately lower their status so that the persons who they are talking to warm up to them and open up, and do not get intimated by the high rank of the officer.

STATUS GAMES

Once, at a ladies club function, an army officer’s wife was desperately trying to find out from my newly-married wife whether I was senior to her husband or was her husband senior to me, so that she could appropriately establish herself in the pecking order.

My wife was quite clueless about my precise seniority.

During the conversation my wife mentioned the name of our neighbour, a senior army officer, who she said was my close friend.

The lady assumed that I was senior to her husband and showed due deference.

Later it transpired that her husband was much senior to me.

This was an unintentional status game.

To have fun when talking to a stranger you can intentionally initiate and play status games.

I once met a social-bee in Mumbai who asked me what I did for a living.

“I am in the navy,” I told her.

She immediately started dropping names and mentioned the name of a very senior naval officer who she claimed was her close acquaintance.

(“Name Dropping” is a sure indicator of “Status Games”. The lady was obviously trying to raise her status so I decided to play a game and alter status).

I casually said that the officer she had named was my subordinate.

First, she looked at me in disbelief, then, a hint of awe, and I decided to go in for the kill, asked her in detail about herself and brought her down to mother earth.

The other day I met an old school classmate of mine after almost 40 years.

I could not even recall him properly since he had been quite an undistinguished student and a mediocre backbencher.

However, he had joined government service, plodded along and  thanks to Assured Career Progression he had reached a reasonably high post.

He mentioned his position, said that it was the civilian equivalent of Brigadier, and asked me, “At what rank did you retire from the navy?”

I was amused, since I was sure that he knew all about me. After all he had got my details from another classmate who had been in the navy with me.

This guy was simply trying to show off his status.

“How does that matter,” I said, “I retired long back.”

“I want to know. Tell me,” he insisted.

“Admiral. I retired as an Admiral,” I said tongue-in-cheek.

“Oh. XXX said that you retired as a Commander,” he betrayed himself, “you worked at a university also, didn’t you?”

“Yes, I was faculty at yyy University,” I said.

He immediately started “name-dropping” saying that the present vice-chancellor of that university was a close acquaintance of his (in an attempt to raise his own status).

Of course, I put him in his place by discussing his academic “achievements” and sissy behaviour during our student days.

Going up and down a person’s timeline is a good way of altering status.

Later, in my blog, I will tell you anecdotes of the delightful fun I have had playing status games while talking to people.

Meanwhile, Dear Reader, whenever someone talks to you do try to discern whether the person is genuinely seeking information or expressing emotions – or whether he or she is playing “status games” with you.

Then, you know what to do.

Of course, the next time you land up at a boring party just walk up to someone you do not know and have fun by initiating and playing conversation “status games”.

Have a Happy Sunday.

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work. 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved. 

NB:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013. All Rights Reserved

Did you like reading this blog post?
I am sure you will like all the 27 stories in my book  COCKTAIL an anthology of Short Fiction.
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html
COCKTAIL ebook
If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramwamankarve@gmail.com

Twitter: @vikramkarve

      

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

HAPPY CONVERSATION

A Quote for Wednesday Morning

That is the happiest conversation where there is no competition, no vanity, but only a calm, quiet interchange of sentiment.

… Dr. Samuel Johnson