Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

My Ex-Fiancée and the Engagement Ring

MY EX-FIANCÉE AND THE ENGAGEMENT RING

A Love Story

VIKRAM KARVE

Circa: December 1980

Port Blair

The weekly mailbag arrived in the afternoon.

There was one letter for me.

The letter was from my fiancée.

I was delighted.

I took the letter – and went into my cabin.

Then – I opened the letter – and I started reading.

Dear Arun,

This is my last letter to you.

I am posting this letter from the airport.

By the time you get this letter – I would have flown far away to a foreign land.

As you know – last month – I had gone to England for a seminar to present a research paper.

There – I met someone – a Lecturer – like me.

He too had come to present a research paper – on the same subject as me.

It was love at first sight – for both of us.

I feel that he will be the right soulmate for me – and – I want to live my life with him.

So – I have decided to go to him – to live with him forever.

I am very sorry – but I am calling off our engagement.

I wish you the best – and I am sure you will find someone better than me.

One more thing – I am taking your engagement ring with me.

I don’t know how to send the ring to you on your ship – and I do not want to give the engagement ring to your parents – or my parents – since – I have not told them about all this.

Everyone thinks I am going abroad for an international conference – even my colleagues – and – once I go there – and I do not come back – they will have to accept the situation.

I believe that the country where I am going is quite liberal – and I will be able to stay there – once I get married to him.

Sorry – once again.

Yours sincerely

Smita

I was devastated that my fiancée ‘Smita’ had dumped me – and that too – in such a cold impersonal manner.

But – in due course – I recovered from the heartbreak – and – I moved on in life.

35 Years Later

Circa: December 2015

Incheon International Airport Seoul

I recognized her at once – it was the same ‘Smita’ who had dumped me.

Our eyes met.

Smita recognized me too.

We smiled at each other.

“What a coincidence – I never expected to run into you over here…” I said.

“I am waiting for a connecting flight to San Francisco…” she said.

“Oh – I am going to Auckland…” I said.

“Auckland…?”

“Tourism – just going on a trip to see New Zealand. And you…?”

“I am returning from a seminar…”

“Oh – you are still in the ‘teaching business’…?”

“Yes – I went on to complete my Ph.D. – and I am a full-fledged Professor for many years now…”

“That’s great…”

“And you…? Still in the Navy…?”

“No. I retired a few years ago…”

“So nice to meet you – my flight will be boarding soon – so I must go now…” Smita said – and she extended her hand.

I was shocked to see that Smita was still wearing the same Engagement Ring that I had given her 35 years ago.

“Hey – you are still wearing my engagement ring…” I said to her.

“Yes – do you want it back…?” she asked me.

“No. No. That is not why I asked. I was surprised to see my engagement ring on your finger even though you are married to someone else…” I said to her.

“I am not married. I never got married. I am still a spinster…” she said.

“What…? You never got married to that guy you met at the seminar…? The lecturer you had mentioned in your letter – the “love at first sight” soulmate who you wanted to live your life with – for whom you dumped me. You never got married to him...?” I asked her.

“Well – I dumped you. And – he dumped me. It is a long story – and I don’t want to discuss it…” she said.

“I am sorry…” I said.

“You must take back your engagement ring…” she said, taking off the ring.

“No. You keep it. Don’t you like the ring…?” I said.

“I love this ring. It is an exquisite ring. That is why I always wear it…” she said.

“If you like the ring so much – you keep it – the ring looks good on your finger…” I said to her.

“Thanks. Thanks a lot. Anyway – since you have let me keep your ring – I must tell you that I am still “available”…” she said, with a mischievous smile.

“Ha Ha – thanks for your offer – but – sadly – I am not “available”…” I laughed.

“Are you married…?” she asked me.

“Of course I am very much married – did you think I would remain “heartbroken” for my entire life…?” I said.

“I didn’t mean it that way…” she said.

“In fact – I came here to pick up a cup of coffee for my wife. Why don’t you come with me and meet my wife…? There is still some time for your flight. We will have a quick cup of coffee. Come – let’s go – my wife will be happy to meet you…” I said.

“Did you tell your wife about me – about how I broke the engagement…?” Smita asked.

“Of course I told her about you – there are no secrets between me and my wife…” I said.

“Oh…” she said.

“Come – let’s go…” I said.

“No. No. I will go for my flight…” she said.

Smita smiled at me – and she quickly walked away.

I walked to the coffee shop to get the cup of coffee for my wife.

“What took you so long to get a cup of coffee…?” my wife asked me, when I returned to her.

“You won’t believe who I met…” I said – and – I told my wife the whole story.

“Your imagination is really running wild nowadays – you are becoming a “Walter Mitty” like character...” my wife said.

“What...? “Walter Mitty” like character...?”

“You keep daydreaming – fantasizing all the time – making up all sorts of stories. And for heaven’s sake – at least – please don’t tell me all these fantasy tales – you can write them in your fiction blog if you want…”

And so – I am writing this “true” story in my fiction blog.

Tell me – Dear Reader – do you believe that this is a true story – or – do you think I am a “Walter Mitty”...?

VIKRAM KARVE

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Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

This is a revised repost of my story SHE DUMPED ME which was written by me Vikram Karve one year ago in the February 2006 and earlier posted on my creative writing blog on Feb 16, 2016 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/02/she-dumped-me.html

Monday, February 27, 2017

Love Duel

LOVE DUEL
A Story

VIKRAM KARVE

“I want to have a word with you...”

“Later. I’m busy...”

“No. I want to talk to you right now...”

“Not now. Please. We’ll talk at lunch break. I have a deadline to meet...”

“I told you I want to talk to you now. It’s urgent...”

“What’s so urgent…?”

“It’s about Nisha…”

“Nisha...?”

“Just lay off…”

“Lay off…?”

“You took Nisha out to a movie and dinner last evening – didn’t you...?”

“So…?”

“So nothing – you just stop seeing Nisha – I don’t like it...”

“You don’t like it…? Just who the hell are you – to like it or not…?

“Who the hell am I…? Nisha is my girl...she is mine…We are in love…”

“Love…? Nisha loves you…? Bullshit...!!! Go and look at your face in the mirror. Is she crazy to love an uncouth clot like you...?”

“You just shut up. And – you just lay off Nisha. I don’t want you too see Nisha – or even talk to her ever again. Do you understand…? I am warning you…”

“Warning…? You are giving me a warning...? Hey Dude – you just buzz off. I like Nisha – and –she likes me too. And – we are seeing each other. So – it is you who has got to vamoose. Got it...? So just get lost and let me get on with my work – I told you I have a deadline...”

“I’ll break your bones…”

“Hey – what are you doing…? Just take your hands off me – this is the office…”

“Okay – I’ll meet you in the evening – outside office – and I will sort you out properly – once and for all…”

“You will sort me out…? Ha – Ha... You sissy – I’ll thrash the hell out of you...”

“Hey – you stop fighting. Just look there – Nisha is coming here – she is walking towards us – she is saying something...”

Nisha comes near the “duelling” men – and – she says to them:

“Hi guys – I was just coming to meet each of you – and – I find you both together – what a coincidence…!!!”

“You were coming to meet us…?”

“Yes. I have got some great news for you – I am getting married…”

“What...? You are getting married…?”

“Yes...”

“To whom are you getting married...?”

“He lives abroad – in the US – in Houston – he is a childhood friend – my classmate from school – we had lost touch with each other – he found me on the net on Facebook a few days ago – we chatted – he proposed this morning – and – I said YES…”

(Maybe this story should be called एक फूल दो कांटे और एक माली – “One Flower, Two Thorns and One Gardener”)

VIKRAM KARVE

Disclaimer:

Copyright Notice:

This story was written by me more than 9 years ago in the year 2008 and posted online by me on my creative writing blogs a number of times including at urls: https://vikramwkarve.wordpress.com/2010/04/15/infatuation-love-and-marriage/ and https://karvediat.blogspot.in/2011/11/one-flower-two-thorns-ek-phool-do-kante.html etc

How to “Manage” Mental Health Care – Military Style

Disclaimer:

This is a humorous spoof – tongue-in-cheek satire – “Humor in Uniform” – pure fiction – just for fun and humor – no offence is meant to anyone – so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

MENTAL HEALTH CARE “MANAGEMENT” – MILITARY STYLE

A Fictional Spoof

VIKRAM KARVE

(NB: The generic terms “Fauji” and “Soldier” refer to all Military Personnel (Officers/Soldiers/Sailors/Airmen) and the term “Faujan” refers to all Military Wives...)

A few months ago – I attended a Literary Festival in Pune.

There was a session on “Stereotypes” in Fiction.

The panelists decried the tendency to stereotype characters – especially in romantic fiction.

Among the panelists was an Army Wife (“Faujan”) – an accomplished author – who has written a successful novel on an Army Wife’s Life.

I candidly told her that – in her novel – she too had “stereotyped” her “hero” – a “Quintessential” Army Officer = “Tough Macho Man” + “Debonair Gentleman” + “Ideal Boyfriend” + “Super Husband” + “Perfect Father” …et al…

She agreed with me – that – at least in Indian Literature – most novels/movies with a military backdrop have a tendency to “stereotype” the Military Officer as the “ultimate impeccable superman” with all the perfect qualities.

Most Military Literature, Movies and Jingoistic Military Recruitment Advertisements reinforce such “stereotypes” of Army, Navy and Air Force Officers.

I have come across a few “Military Wife” Blogs (written by “Faujans”) – where – there is a tendency to stereotype the “Military Wife” – and – believe it or not – even the “Military Girlfriend” has been stereotyped.

If you have served in military uniform – or – if you are married to a person who has served in uniform – you will know that Military Officers and Military Wives (“Faujis” and “Faujans”) are like most normal human beings.

Thanks to this stereotyping of the “Military Officer/Soldier” (“Fauji”) – there is a perception that “Faujis” are so physically robust and mentally tough that it is not possible for “Faujis” to suffer from an “effeminate” frailty like “depression”.

The quintessential “Fauji” is supposed to be a “Tough Guy”.

So – a “Fauji” is expected to be at one of the two “macho” extremes – either he is supposed to be macho “compos mentis” – or go macho “berserk” and run amok.

In the military – there is no scope for middle-of-the-road sensitive fragilities like “depression”.

Things may be different now – but the “good old days” – Mental Health was a simple “Black” and “White” matter – either you were “sane” – or – you were “insane” – there was nothing in between the two extremes.

Being “sensitive” or “emotional” was considered “un-militarily-like” – there was no place for a “sentimental sissy” in the military.

Such “mushy” traits were considered as a sign of effeminate weakness and lack of OLQ (Officer Like Qualities).

The military motto was: “Stop crying like a woman – you must take it like a man”

If you had an “emotional problem” – you had to “sort out” your own problem – or – you had to bear it with stoicism.

If you could not “sort out” your emotional problem – and – you were forced to endure your emotional problem with stoicism – two things could happen:

1. Either – the emotional problem cured itself – and – in due course of time – you became okay.

2. Or – the emotional problem worsened and metamorphosed into a psychiatric disorder – in which case – you were declared a “psycho” – and – sent to the psychiatrist.

Things may have changed now – but – in the “good old days” – there was no concept of psychological counselling to alleviate emotional problems faced by “Faujis”.

In the earlier system of relying exclusively on psychiatric treatment – Military Officers/Soldiers were afraid – that if they officially reported their “emotional problems” to their superiors – it would be presumed that they were suffering from “psychiatric disorders” – and – they would be sent to military hospitals for psychiatric treatment.

Once Officers/Soldiers were referred for psychiatric treatment – their medical category would be downgraded – and – thereafter – for the rest of their life in the service – they would suffer the stigma of being branded as “psycho” – and – their military careers would be ruined forever.

As it is – in those days – Military Officers/Soldiers were apprehensive of going to “specialist” doctors – since they wanted to avoid down-gradation of their “medical category” – which could affect their career prospects.

But – “Faujis” were most terrified of being referred to Psychiatrists – not only would your “medical category” be down-graded – but – you would be branded a “psycho” to boot.

Hence – Officers/Soldiers suppressed their emotional distress.

Emotionally “depressed” Officers/Soldiers tried to “sort out” their emotional problem with “self-cure” – by adopting philosophical/spiritual self-help techniques like “positive thinking” “meditation” “prayer” etc.

Or – “Faujis” resorted to the universal “panacea” for all ills – alcohol – which was provided at concessional rates to “Faujis” – as the macho “remedy” for “depression cure”

“Self-Cure” or “Alcohol Cure” may have worked in some cases of “depression”.

But – if the emotionally distressed individual could not cure himself – this could ultimately result in serious ramifications like mental illness – or – even suicide – in extreme cases.

I do not recall any psychologists posted as counsellors on board naval ships with whom officers/sailors could talk regarding their emotional problems.

The only “counsellors” available were your friends, your family – or – your superior officers – like the officer in the story below – titled “Depression Management”

DEPRESSION MANAGEMENT (an apocryphal story)

During my early Navy days – we this Senior Lieutenant on our ship who had coined a maxim which epitomized “Depression Management” in the Navy:

“EVERY “PROBLEM” IS A “MINOR PROBLEM”

and

A “MINOR PROBLEM” IS “NO PROBLEM”...”

(Therefore – Every “Problem” is “No Problem”...)

A young Sub Lieutenant felt depressed.

So – went to this Senior Lieutenant (who was his direct boss) and said:

“Sir – I have a personal problem…”

The Senior Lieutenant promptly enunciated his favourite slogan:

“Every Problem is a “Minor Problem” – and – a “Minor Problem” is “No Problem”…”

Then – the Senior Lieutenant scolded the Sub Lieutenant and asked him to stop behaving like a sissy: “In the Navy – you sort out your own problems – you don’t go crying like a bloody sissy to your boss regarding your personal problems...”

After that – the Senior Lieutenant shouted at the Sub Lieutenant to “get lost” – to “vamoose” – and ordered him to get on with his work.

In the evening – the distraught Sub Lieutenant tried to unburden himself by talking about his personal problem to his shipmates in the wardroom.

It was a simple “affair of the heart”.

The Officer had fallen in Love with a Girl from a Wealthy Business Family.

The girl’s parents were not interested in their only daughter marrying a “penurious” Navy Officer.

(In fact – the girl was the “only child” of her parents and she was the heir to their “business empire”)

So – the parents had arranged a suitable “business match” for her daughter befitting their affluence and “status” – and – of course – the “business marriage” of their daughter to the son of a business tycoon would help expand their “business empire” as well.

And – though the girl loved the Navy Officer – the girl did not have the guts to go against her parents’ wishes.

The depressed officer’s well-meaning shipmates “counselled” him over a drink in the wardroom:

1. “Forget about her – just get another girl – if you want – I will introduce you to a sexy “fleet auxiliary” who is available at the moment…”

2. “Come on – drink up – and – by tomorrow – you will be fine…”

3. “Why are you crying like a bloody sissy…? You are a tough Naval Officer. Just go and sort it out yourself – just go there – pick up your girl – elope with her – and – get married…”

Now – the depressed officer was deeply in love with the girl – and – it was not possible for him to forget her – and - neither was he interested in having a “lustful affair” with a “fleet auxiliary”.

So – the “depressed officer” drank up – glass after glass of whisky – till – he was drunk to the hilt – and – fortified with alcohol-induced “Dutch Courage” – he drove down on his bike to the girl’s house to “sort out the matter”.

Well – the officer may have been emotionally vulnerable – but – physically – he was a huge powerful hulk – and – in his wild drunken state – he looked very intimidating.

You can well imagine what must have happened – when the fearsome formidable “angry young man” – dangerously drunk and berserk – ran amok in a menacing manner – and – he accosted the girl’s parents – and he tried to forcibly elope with the girl.

It was with great difficulty that they managed to overpower him with the help of the police – who handed him over to the naval police.

Well – in order to save him from big trouble – the easiest thing for the “powers-that-be” to do – was to fill up a form (AFMSF-10) – and to refer the “depressed officer” for psychiatric examination (notwithstanding the fact that he would be branded a “psycho” for life).

Well – you may think that this illustrative fictional story of an “affair of the heart” is a tall story.

But – the fact of the matter is – that – especially in today’s world – military men (and even military wives) – “Faujis” and “Faujans” – they need “emotional sustenance” – to face the multitude of problems peculiar to the Armed Forces – especially pertaining to Soldiers deployed in combat situations and their families.

And – for this “emotional sustenance” – isn’t compassionate counselling a better option than harsh psychiatric treatment…?

Military Hospitals have “Military Psychiatrists” to cure those who have gone “crazy”.

But – I wonder if units/ships have easily accessible “Military Psychologists” to prevent individuals from going “crazy”…?

Isn’t prevention better than cure…?

VIKRAM KARVE

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

This article is an abridged version of my article DEPRESSION MANAGEMENT aka PSYCHO posted by me online many times in my various blogs including at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/09/humor-in-uniform-depression-management.html and https://karve.wordpress.com/2016/09/16/military-psychology-for-emotional-sustenance-and-depression-management/ etc

Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

My Ex-Fiancée and the Engagement Ring

Monday, February 27, 2017

Love Duel

How to “Manage” Mental Health Care – Military Style

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