Are you a moody person...?
Do you have “mood swings”...?
Do you want to be always in a “good mood”...?
I constantly try to be in a “good mood”.
Being in a “good mood” makes me “Feel Good”.
Let me tell you how I try to do this.
The protagonist of the story, Walter Mitty, fantasises that he leads an exciting and heroic life in order to escape his humdrum existence.
It was from this story that I got the idea that you can use your thoughts to drive your feelings and swing your moods.
It is easier said than done – but I keep trying my best.
Let me share my Self Help “Mantra” for Moody Persons with you.
ARE YOU A “MOODY” PERSON ?
Self Help – How to be Happy
By
VIKRAM KARVE
I am a “moody” person.
That is my nature.
Since I am a “moody person” – I have “mood swings”.
Owing to my “mood swings” – I am prone to negative emotions like anger and depression – and worse – I wear my emotions on my sleeve – so everyone can see my “mood”.
Hence – whenever I start feeling depressed, angry or experience negative emotions – I try to “swing” my mood to the positive side.
Mostly – I succeed – but – on a few occasions – I am not so successful in “swinging” my mood totally.
Since I cannot fake my emotions – I endeavour to change my emotions – and I keep trying my best to get into a “good mood”.
Before I “pontificate” on how to “swing” your mood – let me tell you a bit about the “Emotion – Mood – Temperament” continuum – and why it is important for you to remain in a “good mood”.
“EMOTION” – “MOOD” – “TEMPERAMENT”
EMOTION is a response to a “stimulus” (or situation).
This “stimulus” can be either external (outside you) or internal (inside you).
MOOD is a long duration feeling as compared to emotion.
Emotions come and go – but Mood persists.
Emotion is short-lived – it remains as long as the trigger (stimulus) remains.
But – Mood remains for some time – even after the stimulus goes away.
And – sometimes – mood may not need a specific stimulus.
TEMPERAMENT – When Mood persists for a long period it becomes Temperament.
Yes – “Temperament” is “Long Term Mood”
In turbulent situations – Emotion comes First – for example – whenever you are in danger – leading to impulsive action to save you from that danger (fight or flight response).
In normal situations – Thought comes First – and then – Emotion Follows.
However – there are some moody persons (like me) – who are volatile by nature – and they wear their emotions on their sleeve – so they emotionally react impulsively without thinking.
This impulsive emotional nature affects their mood and if repeated over time it affects their temperament too.
I am one such moody and temperamental person – and – I am trying my best to practice what I am going to preach below.
THOUGHTS and EMOTIONS
It is desirable that THOUGHT precedes EMOTION.
If you can manage your THOUGHTS – you can manage your EMOTIONS – and consequently – you will be able to manage your MOOD and TEMPERAMENT.
This may be easy for you – but for a “moody” person like me – this is easier said than done.
DO FEELINGS DRIVE YOUR THOUGHTS...?
Thoughts play a very important role in your life – whereas your feelings can make or break you – and also affect the lives of others around you.
Very often – we let our Attitudes or Feelings hold sway over our lives – rather than let our Thoughts govern our lives.
You let your Feelings drive your Thoughts.
You do not realize that Thoughts drive Actions – and – Actions produce Results.
These Results produce more Feelings.
And these Feelings – in turn – drive your Thoughts.
This leads to a “vicious circle” – which may ultimately lead to loss of self-control.
If you start off with negative feelings – you start this “vicious circle”:
“Feeling –> Thought –> Action –> Result –> Feeling –> Thought –>…”
This vicious cycle where feelings control your life can spiral into depression or anger.
YOU CANNOT CONTROL YOUR FEELINGS
Feelings are not totally controllable – especially for a “moody” person like me.
You may try to “fake” your emotions to the outside world – but inside – you know what you feel.
Many times – Feelings are produced by external circumstances beyond your control.
If “Negative Feelings” are allowed to drive your “Thoughts” and “Actions” – then Undesirable “Results” may emanate.
These “Undesirable Results” in turn produce further “not-so-good Feelings” – and – the vicious cycle continues.
This is true for any unpleasant or negative “Feelings” – like anger, envy, worry, disgust or hatred – which tend to drive our “Thoughts” and “Actions” – and negativity quickly takes charge of our lives.
An analysis of other options indicates that both “Actions” and “Results” are not suitable alternative drivers – since they are not totally controllable – and will not always be pleasing.
The best solution is to establish “THOUGHT” as the driver – because it is controllable – and – we can get good “Results”.
LET THOUGHTS DRIVE YOUR FEELINGS
Your “Thoughts” are in your control – because you can choose what you want to think about.
Moreover – there is a matter of choice.
It is very much in your control to think “Good and Interesting Thoughts”.
The happiest persons are those who think the most interesting and good thoughts.
The human mind cannot totally prevent poor quality thoughts from arising – but you can choose whether or not to dwell on them.
You can move your mind from dwelling on poor quality thoughts by selecting alternative beneficial or pleasant thoughts to focus on.
Choosing to be driven by “Thoughts” – and – then controlling those “Thoughts” – will get you the best possible “Results”.
Positive Thoughts lead to good performance (right actions)
Right Actions yield desirable results.
Desirable Results in turn produce good feelings.
Good Feelings are conducive to better thoughts.
And – progressively – this positively reinforcing cycle facilitates a high degree of self-control – and an overall feeling of happiness.
When good thoughts are combined with good potential – the results can be remarkable.
Thus – the very basis of self-control is:
Refuse to allow our Feelings to control our Responses.
Instead – dwell on good, pleasant, joy-producing Positive Thoughts.
Develop and apply your skill to control your thoughts.
Certain NLP techniques like Swish Pattern are highly effective in achieving this.
By “Positive Thinking” you can gain mastery over controlling your thoughts and thereby letting your thoughts govern your lives.
“Good Thoughts” will make you “Feel Good”.
“Feel Good” will generate “Positive Feelings”.
“Positive Feelings” will make you perform “Good Actions”.
“Good Actions” will produce “Good Results”.
“Good Results” in turn will produce “Good Thoughts”.
And – this positive reinforcing spiral will keep you in a good mood.
That is the key to a happy and healthy life.
It works.
You can take my word for it.
Let me end with a quote from the famous Stoic philosopher Epictetus:
Some things are under our control – others are not.
Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle:
Some things are within our control – and some things are not.
It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule – and learned to distinguish between what you can and cannot control – that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible.
~ Epictetus
Remember:
Thinking “interesting thoughts” is fully within your control.
On the other hand – your “feelings” may be dependent on things beyond your control.
Hence – Dear Reader:
Do not let your feelings drive your thoughts – but – take charge of your thoughts – and – try to ensure that your thoughts drive your feelings – and – “swing” your mood by thinking happy thoughts.
Yes – you can “swing” your mood by thinking “happy thoughts”
And – when you are in a “good mood” – you will “Feel Good”
Cheers.
Be Happy.
May you always be in a good mood – and may you have a happy, optimistic and calm temperament.
VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve
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© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
Disclaimer:
1. These are my personal views. This technique may or may not work for you. Please do your own due diligence while adopting self-help techniques and selecting a philosophy of life.
2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
Copyright Notice:
No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.
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