Showing posts with label repartee. Show all posts
Showing posts with label repartee. Show all posts

Monday, March 31, 2014

HUMOR IN UNIFORM - UNORTHODOX STATIONERY

Humour in Uniform
UNORTHODOX STATIONERY
On page 58 of his war memoir “Himalayan Blunder” (The Curtain Raiser to the Sino-Indian War of 1962) Brigadier John Parashuram Dalvi narrates an amusing story.
This anecdote pertains to the ill-fated “forward policy” which happened in NEFA (Arunachal Pradesh) sometime in 1960.
Indian Army Troops were being hastily rushed up into the Himalayan Mountains towards the China Border without any administrative or logistic arrangements.
A Commanding Officer of an Infantry Battalion, a Lieutenant Colonel famous for his pungent wit and sense of humour, got so fed up with the absence of any sort of supply system that he decided to use some heavy sarcasm and act in a facetious manner.
He is reported to have sent one of his monthly routine reports on a chappati.
Yes, believe it or not, the Commanding Officer sent his report to a higher formation "written" on a CHAPATTI.
This caused some consternation in Army Head Quarters and the officer was asked to forward his “explanation”.
In reply, the Commanding Officer sent the now classic retort:
“I regret the unorthodox nature of my stationery, but atta (wheat flour) is the only commodity available for fighting, for feeding and for futile correspondence”.
I remember someone once telling us that the commanding officer who sent this hilarious reply was none other than Eric Vas [Lt Gen EA Vas (15 May 1923-18 Aug 2009)].
A retired army officer who was serving there in NEFA at that time (1960-61) also confirmed this anecdote.
The officer also told me that as a punishment for his sense of humour Lt Col Eric Vas was removed from command of the infantry battalion and was posted to a Girls NCC Battalion in Mumbai (Bombay).
But after the 1962 debacle, the new Defence Minister YB Chavan who was impressed by Lt Col Eric Vas, brought him back into the mainstream army, and resurrected his career.
General Vas had a distinguished army career and retired as the Eastern Army Commander in the rank of Lieutenant General.
I wonder whether we have such Generals today, who display such great wit to put their point across and who have such a delightful great sense of humour.
The Moral of the Story is that: HUMOUR PREVAILS
Yes, more importantly: HUMOUR IN AND OUT OF UNIFORM PREVAILS

Saturday, March 9, 2013

TIGER REPELLENT POWDER


TIGER REPELLENT POWDER 
A Mulla Nasrudin Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Mulla Nasrudin returned home after a long vacation.

His house had become very dirty so he swept the house and collected all the dust in a sack.

Then he took the sack out of the house and was brazenly dumping the dust on the street when a policeman caught him red handed.

“Why are you dumping dust over here in the middle of the road?” the policeman asked.
 
“This is not dust,” Nasrudin said.

“This is not dust? What nonsense? Then what is it?” the angry policeman asked.

“This is tiger repellent powder and I am spreading this powder on the street to keep the tigers away,” Nasrudin explained.

“What nonsense,” the policeman said, “there are no tigers here in the middle of the city.”

“Exactly,” Nasrudin said, “the tiger repellent powder is effective, isn’t it?”

Have a Laugh and Enjoy your Sunday and have a great Week ahead.

VIKRAM KARVE 
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Did you like this story?
I am sure you will like the 27 fiction short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL 

To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html


COCKTAIL ebook
If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories, creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional research papers in journals and edited in-house journals for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing. Vikram lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
  

Thursday, February 7, 2013

HUMOUR IN UNIFORM - A Navy Style REPARTEE - A Naval Yarn


REPARTEE 

Humor in Uniform
A Naval Yarn


This happened sometime in the late 1970s.


My Boss (a Commander) complained about me to the Captain of the Ship:


“Conceited bugger, he behaves as if he is an Admiral although he is only a piddly Lieutenant.”


The Captain looked at me, and then he looked at my boss, the Commander, and then the Captain pronounced in his thundering voice:

“I’d rather have a Lieutenant who behaves as if he were an Admiral than have a Commander who behaves worse than a bloody Petty Officer.” 


Repartee is a type of Humour which packs a punch and we had it in plenty in the Navy.
If you want to know more about the various Types of Humour do click the link below and read my blog  HUMOUR – The Ultimate Feel Good Factor
 


But before you click the link and go away, please comment and tell us what you thought of the Navy Style Repartee? 

And tell us of the repartee you have used and heard too.

Have a Happy Thursday.

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work. 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Did you like this yarn?  
I am sure you will like the 27 short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-8191091844?affid=nme
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-karve.html
COCKTAIL ebook
If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925

Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie I am sure that you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9mr2o

About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page:  https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramkarve@hotmail.com
      
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.