Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Humor in Uniform – My Hilarious Encounters with “Fauji” Doctors – Part 4 – THE “SIQ” LADY DOCTOR


My Hilarious Encounters with “Fauji” Doctors – Part 4


A Spoof

Story of the SIQ” “Fauji” Lady Doctor – A Spoof by Vikram Karve

A fellow Navy Officer once took his 3 year old daughter to the IAT Pune MI Room.
MI Room stands for Medical Inspection Room – that’s what they call a military medical healthcare clinic in the Army and Air Force. 
In the Navy  “MI Room” is called “Sick Bay”.
Those days there was a lady doctor  a Major of the AMC  posted to IAT Pune as the Medical Officer.
The officer’s small daughter had severe loose motions (diarrhoea).
The moment he entered the lady doctor’s office-cum-clinic, the army lady doctor looked up at my friend’s face and shouted at him, “Why are you coming here and disturbing me? How many days SIQ (Sick in Quarters) do you want? Just go to the office and tell the attendant whatever SIQ you want. He will fill it up and you can take the SIQ slip from there. I have already signed and kept blank SIQ slips over there.”
The stunned Naval Officer told the Lady Army Medical Officer, “Nothing is wrong with me. I am perfectly fit for duties. I don’t want SIQ.”
“Then why have you come here to the MI Room?” the “fauji” lady doctor asked him.
The Naval Officer pointed to his 3 year old daughter, and he said to the lady doctor, “My daughter has got loose motions.”
The lady army medical officer looked down from the officer’s face to his tiny daughter holding his hand and standing below him.
Suddenly, the lady medical officer got excited, and she said, “Loose motions can be very serious – especially in children. You must take her to the Military Hospital (MH) immediately. I will call the ambulance and fill up her hospital admission form. You rush and take her to the Military Hospital Khadakvasla - or better still you take her to Command Hospital Pune - there will be some child specialists over there.”
Later, at a party, the “fauji” lady doctor tried to rationalize her actions and she said to my friend: “You look so young  I am sorry I mistook you for an army course officer. You see, most of the army officers have come to IAT for a training course after a hectic field posting. They consider IAT as an R&R posting – an opportunity for Rest and Recreation. The officers want to relax over here with their families and enjoy this peace tenure. So they mostly come to the MI Room for SIQ chits so that they can relax at home and spend quality time with their families.”
We nicknamed the “Fauji” Lady Doctor in Uniform as: “SIQ Quack or more charitably “SIQ” Medical Officer.

To be continued in Part 5...

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1. This story is a spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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Extract from My Story Earlier 

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