How to Transform Your House into a Happy Home

“HOUSE” vs “HOME”  –  How to Transform Your Beautiful House into a Happy Home

YOUR HOUSE AND YOUR HOME

Musings of a Veteran who loves his Home

By

VIKRAM KARVE

Is your “HOUSE” a “HOME”... ?

Do you know the difference between a House and a Home...?

HOUSE

A house is an inanimate structure – whereas a home is a place you live in. 

A house is a tangible entity – a house is an unsentimental structure which does not have any emotion.

A house can have “aesthetic value” – a house can have “market value” – but it has no “emotional value” 

But – a home radiates emotions and has sentimental value.

Your house can be beautiful – but it cannot be loving – whereas your home can love you.

You can rent out your house – you will feel no qualms about renting out your house to tenants – or even selling it off to a stranger – especially if you have bought the house as an investment.

But – you will never rent out or sell your home – and even if you are forced by circumstances to do so – you will feel very bad about it.

You will treat your “house” as “property” or “real estate” – as a “thing” you will not have any feelings for your house – but – you will feel an emotional attachment towards your “home”.

Your “house” may appreciate in “monetary value” 

But – your “home” will appreciate in “sentimental value”

Your “house” belongs to you 

But – you “belong” to your home – and yes – you too have a sense of belonging towards your home. 

HOME

A home comprises both the animate and inanimate and includes both tangibles and intangible attributes. 

You have to live in a house to make it a home. 

But that is not enough. 

There two vital attributes which epitomize a home: 

1. Firstly – you must always feel like going home. 

Yes – you must feel happy to be in your home. 

Your home must the best place in the world for you. 

2. Secondly – your home must always heartily welcome you. 

Your home must also feel happy when you are home. 

Whenever you come home you must get a feeling that your home is welcoming you and is happy that you have come home. 

Your home always wants you to come home and your home feels happy when you are inside your home.

HAPPY HOME

If you have a Happy Home – you will be able feel these two types of positive vibes:

1. When you arrive at your home – your home always welcomes you with open arms – and – your home always wants you to be there at home.

2. You yourself feel welcome in your home – and for you – your home is the best place in the world – and – you love being at home than anywhere else. 

TWO TESTS OF A HAPPY HOME

In a nutshell – the Two Tests of a HAPPY HOME are:

1. You must be happy in your home 

2. Your home must be happy to have you at home.

WHAT IS A HOME

A home comprises the following two types of things:

1. Tangible things like a house, furniture, décor,  appliances, humans (like family, relatives, other people) and other living beings like pets 

(yes, in addition to the people living in your house – even pets are a part of your home)

and

2. Intangibles like emotions and vibes and “atmosphere” 

HOME VIBES

A good home generates positive vibes in you

and 

You in turn generate positive vibes inside your home 

Your home should be the best place in the world.

UNHAPPY HOMES

Some people are not so lucky. 

They hate going home. 

Yes – I have actually seen some people who do not want to go home.

And probably – their homes too do not welcome them and hate them coming home. 

Some unfortunate people are not happy in their homes

and 

Their homes too are not happy to have them come home 

It is mutual dislike: 

You hate your home – and – your home hates you.

Such people who have unhappy homes find solace outside their homes – and they try to avoid going home – except for the minimum inescapable time. 

Some become workaholics – and prefer remaining in office for long hours rather than go home early.

Some hang around drinking in bars – and drown their sorrows.

Some hang out with friends and colleagues.

Some indulge in frequent partying and socializing – as this keeps them away from their homes.

Some immerse themselves in outdoor activities.

Some travel a lot – to escape from their home.

Some find other escape routes to remain outside their home – for as long as possible. 

By the way – if you love to drink alcohol – and if you love your home too – you will know that – the best place to have a drink is in your own home. 

During my drinking days – since I always loved my home – I always preferred enjoying my drinks at home – rather than drinking in some bar or club. 

I once knew a man who – after work – used to go to his club – and drink there with his friends – and come home drunk at midnight – when everyone in his family was asleep. 

Surprisingly – his wife and children preferred it that way too. 

Obviously – he hated his home – and his home hated him too.

In fact – in many cases – I have seen that a father or some other person in the family generates so much negative vibes in his home – that the other members of the family feel uncomfortable when that person is at home – and – family members feel better – if that negative vibe generating person is away from home.

Yes – just one person generating negative vibes – can destroy the entire atmosphere in a home.

Now – mostly in the case of such a person – his home too generates negative vibes towards him – so – that negative vibe generating person too prefers being outside – as he too does not find it a Happy Home. 

Negative vibes in a home can happen due to conflict between family members – or stressful relationships. 

Negative vibes can also occur in a home due to some other factors – like a gloomy or demoralizing atmosphere caused by illness, poverty or misfortune.

IS YOUR HOME THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD...?

Ask yourself: 

Do you have a HAPPY HOME...?

If the answer is NO – then find out why is it so. 

Is it due to some toxic person living in the house...? 

Or – is it due to some other reason...?

Do you not feel like going to your home...? 

Does your home generate negative vibes towards you...?

For you – is your home the best place in the world...? 

Or – is it not...?

Do you find some other place like your office – or your favourite place to hangout – a much better place than your home...? 

Are you more comfortable outside your home – rather than inside your home...?

Or – do you feel that your home does not welcome you come home...? 

Do you feel that your home does not like you...?

Does your home generate negative vibes towards you – when you come home...?

Do you feel that you generate negative vibes in your home environment – whenever you enter your home...?

Once you have found out the reasons – you must do something about it – and correct matters. 

Yes – you must try to mitigate the sources of negative vibes – and – enhance the happiness vibes. 

Then – you will have a “HAPPY HOME” 

And – for you – your Home will be the best place in the world.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Revised Version of My Article Earlier Posted by Me Vikram Karve at 5/24/2013 01:55:00 AM at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/05/how-to-convert-your-house-into-your-home.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/12/house-vs-home-how-to-transform-your.html etc

How to acquire a house in Deccan Gymkhana

DECCAN GYMKHANA 

If you are an honest Defence Officer – once you retire – you cannot afford to buy a house in Deccan Gymkhana – the most posh, premier and high-brow neighbourhood of Pune. 

That is why most Military Veterans live in the “Military Veteran Ghettos” in the outskirts of Pune – or in other distant suburbs – where most Defence Officers settle down after retirement. 

If you are an honest Defence Officer – the only way you can stay in Deccan Gymkhana after retirement – is – if you are lucky enough to have inherited a bungalow (or house) in Deccan Gymkhana – from your forefathers/ancestors. 

That is why – whenever I visit the area of Deccan Gymkhana – I walk around – “wistfully” looking at the houses in Deccan Gymkhana – wondering – “only if” – I could have managed to acquire a house in Deccan Gymkhana.

Last evening – I walked past a house in Deccan Gymkhana. 

The house was locked. 

The house was locked because the owner of the house (an old lady) had gone abroad to live with her son – who migrated to the US many years ago – and settled down in America permanently. 

As a newly married bride – this old lady had one big ambition – she wanted to live in Deccan Gymkhana. 

I recalled how she had nagged her late husband to buy a house in Deccan Gymkhana – in order to achieve her ambition. 

I smiled at the irony of the situation.

The woman’s nagging had driven her husband crazy – and – he finally succumbed to her ambitions and he bought a house in Deccan Gymkhana which was beyond his means. 

Because of this – he had to slog hard – working overtime – doing many things to earn money – to pay off his housing loans. 

And – all this physical overwork and related mental stress probably caused his untimely death. 

But – his children migrated abroad.

The woman’s ambition for living in Deccan Gymkhana had driven her husband crazy (and maybe even driven him to his untimely death).

And now – instead of living in Deccan Gymkhana – the woman had locked up the house in Deccan Gymkhana – and she gone abroad to live with her children.

What an irony of fate. 

You kill yourself to get something. 

And – when you get it – you can’t even enjoy it...!!!

Maybe all this was in the back of my mind when I wrote a story more than 4 years ago titled “A HOUSE IN DECCAN GYMKHANA”.

This fiction story is about a status-conscious wife who wants to live in the high-brow posh locality in Pune called Deccan Gymkhana.

So – let me delve into my Creative Writing Archives and pull out this story for you to read. 

Do tell me if you like the story...

A HOUSE IN DECCAN GYMKHANA

Fiction Short Story

By

VIKRAM KARVE

A HOUSE IN DECCAN GYMKHANA – a story by Vikram Karve

“My wife wants a house in Deccan Gymkhana...” Shekhar said.

“Are you crazy?” I said.

“Why?”

“No one sells a house in Deccan Gymkhana. There are no houses for sale in Deccan Gymkhana.”

“There is one.”

“How do you know?”

“My wife found out.”

“And what is the cost?”

He told me the exorbitant price of the house in Deccan Gymkhana. 

The sky-high price of the house was much more than what I had expected.

“Tell me Shekhar – from where are you going to get the money to pay for this house in Deccan Gymkhana?” I asked Shekhar.

“I will take a loan,” he said.

“A loan? Who is going to give you such a big loan? And even if they do give you a loan – can you afford it? The bloody EMI will be more than the salary we earn here.”

“I know all that. That’s why I am quitting this job.”

“Are you mad to quit such a good government job? Where will you get such a safe, secure, stress-free, comfortable job with so many perks and benefits?”

“But I won’t be able to buy the house in Deccan Gymkhana.”

“Why are you so obsessed about buying a house in Deccan Gymkhana? What’s wrong with this place?”

“My wife says that this place is too “middle-class” – she wants to live in a posh locality.”

“But your wife has lived her full childhood over here – in fact, she has lived her entire life right here in the heart of this very peth.”

“Yes. That’s why she is fed up of this place – and she does not want to spend the rest of her life living a lowbrow existence over here. She wants a high-class standard of living.”

“Oh – your wife suddenly thinks this place is ‘lowbrow’...? I did not know that your wife has become so snobbish and snooty,” I said.

“Please don’t make sarcastic comments,” Shekhar said, “if you can’t help me – I will manage on my own.”

“Oh – so you think you can buy a house in Deccan Gymkhana on your own? And how do you intend to do that?”

Shekhar showed me the job offer letter.

“Are you crazy? This is a war ravaged country,” I said.

“That’s why they are paying so much. Look at the figure,” Shekhar said.

Yes – the salary was indeed substantial – very substantial – and with this kind of money – Shekhar could easily afford the EMI for the house in Deccan Gymkhana.

“Hey, all this is fine – but you are newly married. This is a 3 year contract. And you won’t be able to take your wife over there to that war-torn country. I hope your wife is ready to stay all alone. Is she ready for a long distance marriage so early in your married life?”

“Of course my wife is ready to make sacrifices. She is the one who found out about this job. In fact she told me that I should even work overtime and encash the one month’s leave and LTA which I am entitled every year and that I should come back straight after 3 years. Then we will have so much money that we will able to live comfortably for the rest of our lives. Here – just look at the pay, the incentives, the allowances, the bonus, the perks…” he said, pointing to the job offer letter.

Shekhar was right. 

The pay packet was indeed very generous – in fact, I had not seen such an attractive compensation package before. 

With this kind of money – Shekhar could easily afford the house in Deccan Gymkhana.

And after just 3 years Shekhar would be able to pay off his loan – and he would still have so much money to spare – that he could just live off the interest. 

But then – money earns more money – and I was sure that with so much money – and with an astute wife egging him on – he would go places and become a very rich and prosperous man. 

Maybe Shekhar would start a business – maybe …

But one thing was sure – this job was going to change his life – not only would he have a house in Deccan Gymkhana – but Shekhar would certainly become a wealthy man.

“Hey, what are you thinking…?” Shekhar said, interrupting my train of thoughts.

“Nothing,” I said.

“So?”

“Your wife is right. You must take this job.”

“And buy the house in Deccan Gymkhana.”

“Of course – that goes without saying,” I said.

And so – my friend Shekhar took up the lucrative foreign assignment and went abroad to the war ravaged country.

But before he left – Shekhar shifted his wife into their plush newly-purchased house in the posh locality of Deccan Gymkhana.   

Shekhar’s wife was overjoyed. 

She personally got the interiors done to her liking in a very classy manner. 

Every time I met her – she seemed happier and happier. 

She truly flourished. 

She had realized her dreams of living in a house in Deccan Gymkhana – and the glow of joy showed on her.

Shekhar would ring up me up from abroad – once in a while.

He was happy – because his wife was happy.

I knew that Shekhar was living a tough and dangerous life. 

From time to time – I saw news reports on TV about incidents of violence in the desolate strife-torn land where Shekhar was working.

I was worried about his safety. 

But whenever we spoke on phone – Shekhar always seemed to be full of cheer.

Maybe – the very thought that he had made his wife so happy – made Shekhar happy too.

One day – my worst fears came true.

Shekhar was killed in crossfire during a skirmish – when rebels attacked the project where he was working.

I thought his wife would be devastated. 

But – surprisingly – she coped with this enormous tragedy with remarkable courage and composure.

At least – financially – she was not that badly off. 

Shekhar’s company had insured their employees heavily.

So Shekhar’s wife received a huge amount of insurance money.

With this money – Shekhar’s wife could pay off the remaining home loan.

Even after paying off the home loan – a very substantial amount of money was still left with her.

Shekhar’s wife invested this huge amount of money in a monthly income scheme which would ensure her a decent income for her entire life.

A few months later – I married Shekhar’s widow – and I moved in with her.

Yes – as her husband – I relocated myself into her posh house in Deccan Gymkhana.

I now live in a beautiful house in the high-class locality of Deccan Gymkhana.

This the story of how I got a house in Deccan Gymkhana...

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This Story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

This story was written be me Vikram Karve in Jan 2013 and first Posted by me Vikram Karve on February 28, 2013, at 2/28/2013 02:10:00 PM in my creative writing blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/02/a-house-in-deccan-gymkhana-blog-fiction.html and re-posted online by me many times including at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/01/how-to-live-in-deccan-gymkhana-pune.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/03/do-you-want-house-in-deccan-gymkhana.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/07/a-house-in-deccan-gymkhana-story.html