How to Organise Cocktail Party – Most Important Tip

COCKTAIL PARTY SUCCESS MANTRA

HOW I ORGANIZED SUCCESSFUL PARTIES

Memoirs of my “extra-curricular” Navy Life

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

A Naval Officer is supposed to be a “Jack of all Trades but Master on One”

So – in addition to your professional “tradecraft” (your primary duty in which you are supposed to be a “Master”) – in the Navy – you are given a lot of “Bum Jobs” (euphemistically called “secondary duties”) – which you are supposed to perform to the best of your ability.

One of the “Bum Jobs” I enjoyed was organizing parties.

I was asked to this quite often – even when I was not the Mess Secretary. 

This indicated that I was good at organizing parties.

There are many “tips” for organizing good parties – food, drinks, snacks, décor, games, music, dancing, prizes, gifts, various arrangements for service etc – and I am sure you know most of them.

But – I will give you just one “tip” – the most important “tip” – which you probably don’t know.

Well – I used this “technique” with great success in official cocktail parties – but I am sure you can use it in various types of cocktail parties as well.

COCKTAIL PARTY SUCCESS MANTRA

This “mantra” is breathtaking in its simplicity:

LET ALCOHOL FLOW FREELY but KEEP WATER SCARCE 

I will repeat the “mantra” once more: 

Let Booze Flow Freely but Restrict Water/Soda 

I used to instruct the stewards to pour generous “Patiala Pegs” (three fingers of Whisky or Rum – which filled almost half the Whisky Tumbler).

All glasses were to be topped up with water or soda (a 50/50 Whisky-Soda or Rum-Water Combination)

Whisky and Soda were served separately only to the “VIP” – but even he was given a stiff “three finger peg” – and – the moment he picked up his glass – the Soda was quickly taken out of sight.

The stewards were given strict instructions to make alcohol easily available in plenty – but to keep water and soda scarce.

Now – like it happens in all “Fauji” Military Parties – all officers would crowd around the “VIP” or senior officers – vying for their attention.

The moment an officer sipped his drink – he would find it quite stiff – a bit too strong for his palate.

I made sure that water or soda was not available – the stewards would keep circulating with stiff “three finger peg” filled glasses of Whisky/Rum – but they were under strict instructions not to serve water/soda.

Now the officers had to choose from one of the two options:

1. Either they could leave the coveted “inner circle” by excusing themselves from the “VIP” – and they would walk all the way to the bar to get soda or water 

(Most “careerist” officers would hesitate to do this – since they would imagine that “excusing” themselves from the “VIP” may not be appreciated by the Senior Officer)

2. Or – they could continue to be in close company with the “VIP” – and keep sipping their drink 

After some time – their palate and tongue would get used to the strong drink. 

(Most officers would fall in this category)

Even for the “VIP” – he would be “encouraged” to sip his stiff drink – rather than making soda available easily.

The primary aim of a military cocktail party is to get the “VIP” quite drunk – or at least “high” – since – having the “VIP” in high spirits augurs well for the ship or unit. 

The pinnacle of success of a military cocktail party is achieved – if the “VIP” gets so drunk that he can hardly stand – and he has to helped out at the end the party.

Alcohol would flow freely – but – Water would be scarce.

Snacks and “small eats” would be kept out of sight – till everyone had imbibed enough alcohol and was in “high spirits”.

Within an hour – “spirits” would be high – and the party would be “swinging”.

Within two hours – most officers would have imbibed enough alcohol to achieve an abundant state of inebriation.

At the end of the party – three hours later – there would be atmosphere of drunken revelry and bonhomie.

Next morning – nursing their hangovers – everyone would “remember” what an enjoyable party it was – and I would be flooded with appreciation. 

“Memorable” parties are those in which you get so drunk – that you don’t remember anything next morning. 

Also – with everyone drunk – there would always be some hilarious antics by someone in his inebriated drunken state – which would be the talking point for the next few days. 

I remember a party where an officer got so drunk and emotional that he prostrated himself before the “VIP” at the end of the party 

(The “VIP” was also in “high spirits” – swaying from side to side – as he staggered towards his staff car) 

Next morning – everyone said that it was a most memorable cocktail party.

NB: 

Those days – in the Navy – officers drank as per the “colour of the sky” – so at evening cocktail parties – Whisky and Rum was served – and “pansy cocktails” and “ladies drinks” were kept out of these all-male “hard drinking” affairs.

It has been my experience that this “mantra” – Let alcohol flow freely but keep water scarce – works well for all cocktail parties. 

Pour “Three Finger Patiala Pegs” of Rum/Whisky and top them up with water/soda – and then – disappear the water/soda and let Rum/Whisky flow freely. 

Once the first stiff peg is down – your guests will get used to strong pegs – and start downing them fast – their “spirits” will be “high” pretty soon – and the party will be a grand success with everyone “enjoying” themselves in alcoholic trance. 

Also – with everyone in “happy” states of drunkenness – you don’t have to bother too much about the food – since – at the end of the hard drinking bout – with their “gustatory” abilities dulled with alcohol – your guests won’t discern the taste of food very much. 

The “proof of the pudding” of the success of the party is – if your guests get so drunk – that they don’t remember anything next morning – what they ate – how the party ended – how they got home – they should remember nothing – and they should wake up with a heavy hangover. 

Such guys will always say that the party was a “success”. 

So – “Let the Booze Flow Freely but keep the water scarce...”

Dear Reader: 

Next time you host a cocktail party – try it – and let us know if it worked for you. 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

  

Updated Re-Post of my Story COCKTAIL PARTY SUCCESS MANTRA posted earlier in this blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/10/cocktail-party-success-mantra.html

How to Drink – Musings on the Art of Drinking Alcohol by a Retired “Drunkard”

HOW TO DRINK (AND NEVER HAVE A HANGOVER)

Musings on the Art of Drinking Alcohol by a Retired “Drunkard”

By

VIKRAM KARVE 

HANGOVER – “MORNING-AFTER” THE “NIGHT-BEFORE”

A Hangover is a terrible experience. 

You wake up in the morning with a throbbing headache.

You feel a disgusting nausea.

You may even throw-up and vomit.

Your mouth becomes dry due to dehydration.

Your whole body aches.

You feel dizzy.

Sometimes your hands tremble – and you experience the “shakes” (Delirium Tremens or DT).  

You curse yourself for drinking so much at the party the previous night. 

You know that – the more you “enjoy” on the “night-before” – the more miserable you feel on the “morning-after”. 

A hangover is the worst way to ruin your Sunday morning after your weekend partying. 

But – despite this terrible experience – you repeat the same binge-drinking at the next party – and you land up suffering a hangover on the morning-after. 

Drink – Hangover – Drink – Hangover...

It is a vicious cycle – that seems to become the rule with your partying. 

But – how do you stop this vicious circle of drinking and hangover...?

Your friends tell you about so-called “cures” for a hangover – like the “hair of the dog” – and so many other mythical cures.

But soon you realize that nothing works for a terrible hangover.

The only thing you can do is suffer in silence – and “sleep out” the hangover.

There is a saying: 

“Prevention is Better than Cure” 

This applies to hangovers too. 

How do you prevent a hangover...?

The sure-shot way to avoid a hangover is to stop drinking alcohol and become a strict teetotaller.

But obviously – you don’t want to do that.

How can you give up all your enjoyment and your partying – how can you give up your social life...? 

You want to enjoy drinking alcohol – but you also want to ensure that you do not get a hangover the next morning.    

The aim of drinking alcohol is to feel good. 

If I ask you: “Why do you drink...?”

You will say: “I drink because I want to “feel good”...”.

So – whenever you drink – you must drink enough to raise your spirits and feel good. 

There is no point in drinking for the sake of appearances.

Why drink so little alcohol – that you do not feel anything...?

Yes – you must drink enough to feel good – but you must also make sure you don’t get a hangover next morning. 

Hangover – Prevention is Better than Cure

HOW TO PREVENT A HANGOVER

You want to drink alcohol.

But – you want to avoid a hangover.

So – how do you drink in such a way as to avoid a hangover...?

Is there a way where you can enjoy your drinks – yet prevent a hangover on the “morning after”...?  

Yes – there is a way.

It is simple. 

Just follow these 2 simple steps to prevent a hangover: 

1. DRINK ONE GLASS OF WATER BEFORE YOUR FIRST DRINK

and 

2. DRINK ONE GLASS OF WATER AFTER YOUR LAST DRINK 

Before you have your first drink – have a glass of water. 

The glass of water will help you cool down in case you are physically/mentally stressed. 

Also – the water will re-hydrate you in case you are deydrated.

Then – start drinking.

It is a good idea to have plenty of snacks while drinking – yes – snack heavily while drinking – meat based snacks – barbequed meats – tandoori chicken – kebabs – fish fingers are the best. 

After your drinking session is over – have a nice cool glass of water.

Then – proceed for having your dinner.

Do not drink alcohol during your meal. 

Do not drink alcohol after your meal. 

Yes – you must avoid drinking any type of alcoholic beverages while eating your main meal.

Even wines are best avoided if you want to prevent hangover. 

If you feel thirsty while having your meal – you can always drink water.

After your dinner – make sure you eat dessert or pudding – especially a milk-based dessert like ice cream. 

Then – end your meal with a glass of water.

Never have after-dinner drinks like liqueurs or brandy – if you have had alcoholic drinks before dinner.

In case you are fond of liqueurs – do enjoy them after a relaxed meal which has not been preceded or accompanied by alcohol.  

One more tip. 

During your drinking session – if you ever feel tipsy – all you have to do is to just interrupt your drinking – and have a glass of cold water. 

Then – once you feel okay – you can resume your drinking. 

If you still experience tipsiness – keep drinking cold water till your drunkenness disappears – and you feel good again. 

Remember:

The aim of drinking alcohol is not to get drunk

The aim of drinking is to feel “Nice”.

HOW TO CHOOSE WHICH LIQUOR TO DRINK AT THE TIME OF THE DAY 

A Hangover not only depends on the amount of alcohol you drink – but – even the type of alcohol you drink matters.

Your alcoholic drink must match the “colour” of the day.

Look at the sky on top of you at the time of the day – and choose your booze accordingly.

Yes – you must – DRINK AS PER THE COLOUR OF THE DAY – as we say in the Navy.

In the mornings – it is best to drink light coloured liquor like like Vodka, Gin, White Rum, Coconut Feni etc 

(When we were in the Navy – it was rumored that a redoubtable “Sea-Dog” even brushed his teeth with Vodka)

As the day progresses – and – the afternoon approaches – drinks like beer and bright cocktails are suitable. 

As the sun goes down – and – the evening approaches – you will relish “Blended Whisky” with plenty of bubbly Soda in the evening – as a “Sundowner” – with the setting sun in the twilight.

As the night darkens – there is nothing to beat dark Rum. 

You can drink your Rum “on the rocks” – or with water – as “Rum-Paani”.

Avoid combinations like Rum and Coke. 

If you prefer Whisky – slowly sip neat “Single-Malt Whisky” at room temperature – to get you into a mellow mood.

And – if you like the taste of good Brandy – you may like to savour a drink of neat rich Brandy at night. 

Whenever I indulged in serious drinking – I always drank my whisky or rum with plenty of water – and – I avoided cocktails – unless it was just to taste the cocktail – yes – if you like – do drink cocktails for taste – not for the “feel good” effect of alcohol.

And – yes – I always avoided drinking “down-the-hatch” shots. 

I will advise you to avoid “shots” and binge drinking.

Also – you must never “down-the-hatch” your glass – or gulp your drink in a hurry. 

If you are drinking a rich brandy or single-malt whisky – always drink it neat.

Drink unhurriedly.

Take a small sip – close your eyes – roll the liquor on your tongue in a relaxed manner – till the liquid is absorbed by itself.

Never gulp your drink – or swallow booze “down-the-hatch”.

Savour every sip – till the alcohol is absorbed within you – and you will relish the feeling as the alcohol slowly warms your insides and elevates your spirits

Remember the saying: 

मज़ा लेना है पीने का – तो – कम कम – धीरे धीरे – पी  

(If you want to enjoy drinking – drink small sips – and drink slowly)

HANGOVER-FREE DRINKING

Try this technique the next time you drink:

Have a Glass of Cold Water before your First Peg 

and 

Remember to have a Glass of Cold Water after your Last Drink

This is a sure-fire way to “feel good” on the “night-before” – but avoid a hangover on the “morning after”. 

Breathtaking in its simplicity – isn’t it...? 

It is my experience that this – “one-glass-of-water-before – and – one-glass-of-water-after” – “two glasses of water” technique works – you can take my word for it.

Try this – and you will never have a hangover again.

So – if you must drink – enjoy the experience and make sure you feel good.

But – make sure that you prevent that excruciating hangover.

Cheers … !!! 

Enjoy your drinking and have hangover-free mornings ... !!! 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. These are my personal views based on my personal experience. This may or may not work for you. Please do your own due diligence while selecting a hangover prevention technique.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

This is an abridged, upgraded and revised version of my post (Part 5) in my HOW TO DRINK ALCOHOL (ART OF DRINKING) series written be me Vikram Karve 6 years ago in the year 2010 and posted online earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/10/how-to-drink-alcohol-part-5-how-to.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/06/how-not-to-get-drunk-yet-feel-nice.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/07/hangover-how-to-drink-alcohol-yet-avoid.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/07/hangover-prevention-is-better-than-cure.html etc