Monday, September 4, 2017

What are you doing after retirement...?

This morning someone asked me: 

What are you doing after retirement...?
 

And – I remembered this post I had written sometime ago...

RETIREMENT 
Musings on MILITARY LIFE AND BEYOND
By
VIKRAM KARVE 

A few days after I retired – a ex-Navy friend of mine offered me a job in Civvy Street
” (Civilian Corporate World).

I politely declined the job offer. 

So – he asked me: 

“Have you taken up some job...?
” 

“No...
” I said.

“Oh 
 
– 
 
so you must be doing some business...?
” he asked.

“No...
” I said.

“Then – what are you doing after retirement...?” he asked. 

“Nothing. I am doing nothing...” I said. 

“But 
 – how can you 
 
do nothing
 ...?
 
” he said. 

“It is easy 
 
 
 I practised 
 
“doing nothing”
 
when I was in service...” I said.

“What...?
” 

“Yes. Earlier 
before retirement – I was “doing nothing” wearing uniform. Now after retirement – I “do nothing” wearing civilian clothes
 
...
 ” I said. 

The word spread that I had gone crazy 
 
– and – all post-retirement job-offers stopped.
 
 

Once – at the Navy Veterans Meet – a fellow Navy Veteran asked me same 
quintessential question that everyone asks me: 

“What are you doing after retirement...?” 

And 
  I gave him the same answer
 

“Nothing. I am 
 
doing nothing
...”
 
  

This answer lead to an admonishment: 

“Why are you 
 
doing nothing
 
 after retirement...?” 

I wonder why a truthful answer that I am 
 
 
doing nothing
 
 
 after retirement results in disbelief and admonishment as if I was doing something wrong
...?

I retired on superannuation from the Navy many years ago 
 – 
 
and 
 
 
 since then 
 
 
 I am leading a truly retired life 
 
“doing nothing”.

Yes 
 
I am “doing nothing”. 

But 
 
isn’t that what I am supposed to do...?

Tell me 
 
what is the definition and meaning of retirement...?

“Retirement” means “Doing Nothing” – isn’t it...?

Many don’t seem to understand this. 

So 
– 
whenever I meet my erstwhile colleagues 
 and young officers too 
 they all ask me what I am doing after my retirement 
– 
and they seem perplexed 
– 
when I honestly answer that I am “doing nothing” after my retirement.

Of course 
 
many of my retired colleagues are actually doing nothing.

B
ut 
 
they try to put on a pretence as if they are very busy 
 
and 
 
they try to masquerade as if they are doing something very important after retirement. 

Maybe 
 they indulge in this charade because they feel embarrassed to speak the truth. 

M
aybe 
– they 
think that 
 they will lose face if they truthfully say that they are 
“doing nothing”
 
.


MILITARY LIFE AND BEYOND  The Retired Veteran

Now let me talk a bit about the topic – RETIREMENT and discuss some tips on retirement for Military Officers belonging to the Army, Navy and Air Force.

In most jobs you retire at the age of 60.

Sometimes the retirement age is 65 or 70 
– 
if you are a Professor or a Judge 
– 
or you are a Bureaucrat who has managed to get an “extension” 
– 
or a cushy post retirement job 
– or have joined politics
.

In some vocations 
 like business and politics 
– 
you never retire 
– 
and you keep on working incessantly till your death.

However 
 if you happen to serve in the Defence Services 
 in the Army, Navy or Air Force 
 you retire early. 

If you are an Officer 
 it is most likely you will retire on superannuation at the age of 54 – a few lucky ones may pull on to 56.

Only those who attain Flag Rank (and become Generals, Admirals or Air Marshals) can remain in service beyond that age and retire at 58 or 60 like their civilian counterparts. 

However, owing to the steep pyramidal hierarchical organisational structure a very small percentage get promoted to flag rank.

In the Civil Services
 
 
you have Assured Career Progression (or ACP).

In the Defence Services 
 
owing to the poor career prospects due to the high possibility of supersession and consequent early retirement 
 
you have Assured Career Truncation or ACT.

I do not have the exact figures 
– 
but
 
 
from what I have observed 
 
 
 it seems that hardly 1% of the officers who join finally get promoted to flag rank 
– 
whereas 
 
in the civil services 
 
almost everyone becomes a Joint Secretary (equivalent to flag rank) before he or she retires due to ACP and NFU.

Soldiers, Sailors and Airmen retire much earlier – most retire after 15 years service at the prime of their life 
 in their mid thirties at around 35 years of age

It is not feasible to “settle” your children and complete your familial responsibilities at this young age, so they have no choice and have to take up a second career in the “civvy street”.

Officers are caught midway. 

If you want to truly “retire” on your superannuation date 
 then you must ensure that all your domestic commitments and familial obligations are complete well before you are 54 years of age.  

You must have your own “retirement home” to live in and you must have enough savings to lead a decent retired life in these days of burgeoning inflation. 

And of course, most importantly, your children should have completed their studies and must be settled in life.

If you can achieve all this before you retire, then you can indulge in the luxury of “doing nothing” after retirement and lead a truly blissful retired life.

If you are in the Navy (or Army or Air Force)  it is best not to marry

If you are a bachelor – you will be well looked after by the service

But – if you do want to get married  please marry early – and have all your children as early as possible.

Calculating backwards  all your children must be settled in life by the time you reach the retirement age of 54.

This means that you must have all your kids before you reach the age of 30 (assuming that your youngest kid will complete his or her education and get a job by the age of 24).

This is the best case optimistic scenario  assuming that your children study well – and are good at academics.

So – you must get married at the stipulated age of 25 (or even earlier if possible). 

Yes 
– Army Navy and Air Force Officers must get married as early as possible

And Defence Officers must have all their children as early as possible too.

Remember  for every child you have after you are 30 years old – you are putting pressure on your retired life – and – you may not be able to afford the luxury of “doing nothing” after retirement.

Some officers marry late or have children late in life. 
 
I have seen a situation where children were still in school when an officer retired at the age of 54. 

The poor guy had no choice but to take up a job and spend many years of his retired life slogging it out in the “civvy street”.

Of course, if you are married to a “career woman” then it is really great.

You can enjoy your retirement “doing nothing” – while your “breadwinner” wife “brings home the bacon” and “puts bread on the table” – to speak metaphorically.

In this respect  Lady Officers are luckier. 

At least in the contemporary societal context in India where the concept of a “homemaker husband” is yet to take root  a Lady Officer is likely to be married to a “career man” – and she has the luxury of choosing when to “retire” and start “doing nothing”

It makes sense for Lady Officers of the Army Navy and Air Force to marry Civilians who will keep working till 60. 

Of course  even for Gentlemen Military Officers who choose to marry a career woman  it is better to marry someone outside the military profession  at least from the retirement point of view. 

The moral of the story is that military officers are at a disadvantage vis-à-vis their civilian counterparts as far as retirement age is concerned.

If you are a civilian you will retire at 60  or later  and – by that age – all your familial commitments are likely to be over – and you can look forward to a blissful retired life with a higher pension too  due to the additional years of service you enjoy vis-à-vis your disadvantaged military counterpart.

There is great advantage for a military service officer to marry a civil services (IAS, IPS, IRS etc) Lady Officer so that he can continue to enjoy benefits and perks of his spouse for a number of years after his own retirement. 

(The moot question is whether any Civil Services Lady Officer would be willing to marry a Defence Officer)

Dear Reader  if you are a military officer  or are planning to join the army, navy or air force  remember – that you are going to retire early.

It will be good if you can plan your life accordingly so that you can enjoy the indulgence of “doing nothing” after your retirement.

And when people have the audacity to ask you the quintessential question: 

“What are you doing after retirement...?” 

You can nonchalantly, truthfully and matter-of-factly say: 

“I am doing nothing”.


AFTERTHOUGHT 

WHY DO MILITARY VETERANS “WORK” AFTER RETIREMENT...?

There are some retired officers who are “financially secure” and who have completed all their familial obligations.

They can easily make ends meet within their pension.

But they continue to work even after retirement.

Why is this...? 

Why do financially secure retired officers, who do not financially need to work to earn money, continue to work after retirement...?

I feel that there are 3 reasons why financially secure military veterans keep working after retirement:

1. They are workaholics and are incapable of “doing nothing”.

2. They are greedy and do not know when to say “enough is enough” as far as money is concerned. 

They are never happy with whatever material possessions they have got.

3. They are not content with what they have achieved in life and want to keep chasing elusive dreams and keep aspiring for more and more “success”. 

These persons are forever in the rat race 
– 
constantly comparing and competing with others 
– 
and either they have unrealistic expectations of themselves 
– 
or they suffer from an “inferiority complex”.


CONCLUSION

The conclusion from this afterthought is:

To be able to “do nothing” after retirement 
– 
you must be happy wherever you are 
– 
and you must be content with whatever you have got
.

Wish You a Happy Retired Life “Doing Nothing”.

Let Every Day of your Retired Life be a Blissful Holiday.

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 
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Disclaimer:
1. This is based on my personal experience. It may or may not work for you. So please do due diligence before trying out this technique.
2. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
3. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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