Humor in Uniform : Motivation – Military Style

Humor in Uniform 

MILITARY MOTIVATION – In a Nutshell

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE 

NB: The generic term “Fauj” means Military and includes all the three Armed Forces – Army, Navy and Air Force 

MOTIVATION THEORIES

If you have studied “Management” – you will be aware of various “Motivation Theories” which you can use to “motivate” employees working in the civilian industry/corporate sector/offices.

A few of these  “Employee Motivation Theories”  which I have heard of are listed below:

1. Maslow Hierarchy of Needs Theory

2. ERG Motivation Theory Alderfer

3. McClelland Achievement and Acquired Needs Theory

4. Stacey Adams Equity Theory

5. Herzberg Hygiene Factors and Motivators Theory

6. Vroom Expectancy Motivation Theory

7. Hackman and Oldham Job Characteristics Model

If you surf the internet – you will find a deluge of information of “motivation” and “motivation theories”.

Ostensibly – most people think that these same civilian motivation theories are applicable to the military as well.

That is what was told to me at the numerous “Defence Management” courses I attended from time to time as a part of my “Officership Training”.

However – the motivation style that I observed during my long military career – in the Navy – was totally different from the well-known motivation theories taught in management courses.

In the Military – FEAR is used as the prime motivator

In fact – Military Law and Rules/Regulations have been framed in such a way as to inspire fear in the hearts of those subject to these laws/rules/regulations.

You don’t believe me...?

Just read ‘The Navy Act, 1957’

Most Chapters/Sections of this Act are devoted to discipline, punishments, court-martial etc.

By chance – if any Navy aspirant reads ‘The Navy Act’ – he/she may think twice before signing up.

(To be fair to the Navy – I remember that it was mentioned in our appointment letter that we should obtain a copy of The Navy Act, 1957 – and we were advised to read it to familiarize ourselves about the Navy before joining – they had even given details of Law Book Stores where it would be available)

Well – I am not familiar with Army and Air Force Acts/Rules/Regulations – but I can guess – that just like Navy Act/Regulations – these military regulations have been designed to inspire fear – because – probably – the Military believes that “Fear is the Key to Discipline”.

“FEAR” MOTIVATION

As we discussed earlier – in the Military – FEAR is used as the ‘Prime Motivator’.

The Rules/Regulations ensure that a military officer is permanently under the fear of “disciplinary action” – from the day he joins the military – till he retires from service and becomes a civilian again.

However – there are other “fears” employed to “motivate” you at various stages of your military career.

A Cadet is “motivated” by the “fear of physical punishment”.

Any “mistake” committed by a cadet is “rewarded” by various kinds of physical/corporal punishments.

Once a cadet passes out of the academy and becomes an officer – he enjoys a relatively good life – till he approaches the select rank “promotion zone”.

As he spends these crucial years of his military career – doing “criteria appointments/courses” – the officer is overcome by “career fear”  

Now – “fear of supersession” becomes the main motivator.

Suppose the officer gets promoted – and remains in the “rat race” – this “fear of supersession” will continue to “motivate” him till such time he finally gets passed over for promotion.

Once an officer is superseded and has been passed over for promotion – the “fear of supersession” is no longer works a “motivator” for him.

Now – after supersession – the superseded officer can be “motivated” by the “fear of transfer” or “posting fear”.

This last “motivator” (“fear of transfer”) can be used effectively to “motivate” the officer till the last day until the officer finally retires from service.

“SELF ACTUALIZED” OFFICERS

Of course – there are some self-actualized “mavericks” who are beyond motivation.

As Cadets – they are willing to undergo any amount of physical hardships.

These tough guys are not afraid of punishments – and they are not bothered about restrictions/relegations. 

So – “fear of physical punishment” does not work as a “motivator” for these mavericks. 

Later – as Officers – they don’t care two hoots about promotion and posting.

Yes – I have seen officers who are not bothered about promotion – they are prepared to go anywhere on posting. 

So – “fear of supersession” and “fear of transfer” do not work as “motivators” for these self-actualized officers.

These “fearless” individuals who are beyond “motivation” are the truly happy officers who genuinely enjoy every moment of their military life from their cadet life right until their retirement.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

 

This is a revised re-post of my article “MILITARY MOTIVATION” written by me Vikram Karve one year ago in 2015 and posted by me Vikram Karve at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/11/military-motivation-in-nutshell.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/03/humor-in-uniform-military-motivation.html

Humor in Uniform – Military Motivation Theory

Humor in Uniform 

Continued from Lessons I Learnt in “Defence Management” Part 1 – Brainstorming 

Lessons I Learnt in “Defence Management” Part 2 – Motivation

NB:

1. At the end of Part 1 – I had stated that Part 2 would be on Inventory Management. But before that – I think it would be apt to talk about Motivation – and I will discuss Inventory Management in Part 3 or later.

2. The generic term “Fauj” means Military and includes all the three Armed Forces – Army, Navy and Air Force) 

MILITARY MOTIVATION – In a Nutshell

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

MOTIVATION THEORIES

If you have studied “Management” – you will be aware of various “Motivation Theories” which you can use to “motivate” employees working in the civilian industry/corporate sector/offices.

A few of these “Employee Motivation Theories” which I have heard of are listed below:

1. Maslow Hierarchy of Needs Theory

2. ERG Motivation Theory Alderfer

3. McClelland Achievement and Acquired Needs Theory

4. Stacey Adams Equity Theory

5. Herzberg Hygiene Factors and Motivators Theory

6. Vroom Expectancy Motivation Theory

7. Hackman and Oldham Job Characteristics Model

If you surf the internet – you will find a deluge of information of “motivation” and “motivation theories”.

Ostensibly – these same civilian motivation theories are applicable to the military as well.

That is what was told to me at the numerous “Defence Management” courses I attended from time to time as a part of my “Officership Training”.

However – what I observed during my long military career, in the navy, was totally different.

In the Military – FEAR is used as the prime motivator.

In fact – Military Law and Rules/Regulations have been framed in such a way as to inspire fear in the hearts of those subject to these laws/rules/regulations.

You don’t believe me?

Just read ‘The Navy Act, 1957’

Most Chapters/Sections of this Act are devoted to discipline, punishments, court-martial etc – and – if any aspirant reads ‘The Navy Act’ – he/she may think twice before signing up.

(To be fair to the Navy – I remember that it was mentioned in our appointment letter that we should obtain a copy of The Navy Act, 1957 – and we were advised to read it to familiarize ourselves about the Navy before joining – they had even given details of Law Book Stores where it would be available)

Well – I am not familiar with Army and Air Force Acts/Rules/Regulations – but I can guess – that just like Navy Act/Regulations – they too have been designed to inspire fear – because – probably – the Military believes that “Fear is the Key to Discipline”.

“FEAR” MOTIVATION

As we discussed earlier – in the Military – FEAR is used as the ‘Prime Motivator’.

The Rules/Regulations ensure that a military officer is permanently under the fear of “disciplinary action” – from the day he joins the military – till he retires from service and becomes a civilian again.

However – there are other “fears” employed to “motivate” you at various stages of your military career.

A Cadet is “motivated” by the “fear of physical punishment”.

Any “mistake” committed by a cadet is “rewarded” by various kinds of physical/corporal punishments.

Once a cadet passes out of the academy and becomes an officer – he enjoys a relatively good life – till he approaches the select rank “promotion zone”.

As he spends these crucial years of his military career – doing “criteria appointments/courses” – the officer is overcome by “career fear” – and “fear of supersession” becomes the main motivator.

Suppose the officer gets promoted – and remains in the “rat race” – this “fear of supersession” will continue to “motivate” him till such time he finally gets passed over for promotion.

Once an officer has been passed over for promotion – the “fear of supersession” ceases to be a “motivator”.

Now – after supersession – the superseded officer can be “motivated” by the “fear of transfer” or “posting fear”.

This last “motivator” can be effectively used till the officer finally retires from service.

EPILOGUE

Of course – there are some “mavericks” who are beyond motivation.

As Cadets – they are willing to undergo any amount of physical hardships – they are least afraid of punishments – and they are not bothered about restrictions/relegations.

Later – as Officers – they don’t care two hoots about promotion and posting – yes – I have seen officers who are not bothered about promotion – and they are prepared to go anywhere on posting.

These “fearless” individuals who are beyond “motivation” are the happy officers who truly enjoy every moment of their military life. 

To be continued in Part 3 … (Inventory Management)

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

 

This is a revised re-post of my article “MILITARY MOTIVATION” written by me Vikram Karve one year ago in 2015 and posted by me Vikram Karve at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/11/military-motivation-in-nutshell.html

DO MILITARY OFFICERS HAVE BRAINS – or – Is “Anti-intellectualism” an OLQ (Officer Like Quality) – Humor in Uniform

Humor in Uniform

DO MILITARY OFFICERS HAVE BRAINS...?

or

Is “Anti-intellectualism” an OLQ (Officer Like Quality)...?

A few days ago – I received an invite for PILF 2015 – Pune International Literary Festival 2015 –  scheduled in the first week of September.

This evoked in me some delightful memories of PILF 2013 – held 2 years ago – in September 2013 – especially the enlightened discussion with a young lady during the Question/Answer Session of the workshop on “Blogging” that I conducted at the Literary Meet.

So – here is the article – comprising the “memoir” and my “reflections” – once more – for you to read, have a laugh and ponder over...  

THE MILITARY “BRAIN”

Reflections of a Navy Veteran

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

Around two years ago – in September 2013 – I was invited to conduct a workshop on “Blogging” at a Literary Meet (Pune International Literary Festival – PILF 2013).

During the discussions – a smart young lady sitting in the first row asked me a question:

“Sir – I have read your book of short stories and I regularly read your writings on your blogs – especially your fiction stories – and I was wondering – ‘...How is it possible that you can think so creatively despite having spent so many years in the Navy?’...”

At first – I was stumped.

But – I quickly recovered my wits – and I said: “Life in the Navy is so eventful – you meet so many unforgettable characters – you have so many interesting experiences – so you get plenty of material to write about.’

“No, Sir – I did not mean life experiences. I am asking about thinking ability. Tell me, Sir – ‘...Doesn’t military life affect the ability to think creatively?’...” she asked.

“I really did not understand your question – could you please elaborate?” I asked her.

“Sir – I was an army officer till recently – and I found the atmosphere quite stifling and restrictive – which inhibits creative thinking...” the smart young lady said.

Now – I was beginning to understand what she was driving at – so I said: “Do you mean the military “anti-intellectualism” – which suppresses intellectual activity – the military regimentation ethos of  ‘...“Don’t use your brain – just do as you are told” army culture?’...”

“Yes, Sir – that is exactly what I mean...” she said.

I smiled to myself.

She was echoing the thoughts of Liddell Hart.

Sir Basil Henry Liddell Hart (31 October 1895 – 29 January 1970) – commonly known throughout most of his career as Captain B. H. Liddell Hart – was an English soldier, military historian and military theorist.

Liddell Hart – while highlighting the dangers of “anti-intellectualism” in the army – had pointed out the reason due to which military officers lose their creative thinking abilities.

He opined that:

“...A lifetime of having to curb the expression of original thought culminates so often in there being nothing left to express...”.

There is a saying which applies to the Brain:

“Use it – or you will lose it”

I have read somewhere that there is a relationship between mental activity and cerebral blood-flow – and – like muscles – the brain atrophies from prolonged disuse.

Military Officers (especially Army Officers) are encouraged to do plenty of physical exercise to keep their body fit.

However – the anti-intellectual “just do as you are told – don’t use your brain” military culture inhibits the use of the brain.

The ramification of this regimented blind-obedience military culture is that military officers keep their bodies fit by constant physical exercise – but they neglect exercising their brain (especially the right hemisphere of the brain).

While a military officer may occasionally use his analytical “left brain” – his creative “right brain” will fall into disuse and atrophy.

And – as the military officer spends more years in service and becomes a senior officer – he will lose the ability to think creatively.

The young smart ex-fauji lady officer had a point and she was implying that:

‘...Living for a prolonged duration in a dogmatic “don’t use your brain – just do as you are told” strait-jacketed “anti-intellectual” insular military environment can certainly affect your creative thinking abilities...’

Obviously – during her days as an army officer – the young lady had experienced this intellectually suffocating feeling.

Maybe – she had also observed the detrimental effect of the prevailing military culture of “anti-intellectualism” on the creative faculties of her peers and seniors.

Obviously – during her days in the army – she had experienced that this “blinkered thinking army culture” was constraining her creativity.

Probably that was the reason why she had quit the army before it was too late – in order to enable her creative juices to flow freely – and – now – as a civilian – her creativity was certainly flourishing – as was evident from the inspired creative writing on her blog.

Well – I told the young lady that the intellectual culture in the navy was certainly more liberal and “broadminded” than what she had experienced in the army – and – in general – the navy milieu was conducive to creative thinking.

In fact – I found navy life quite eventful – and this probably gave my creative thinking ability an impetus – as there was never a dull moment in the navy – with so many curious characters around.

“ANTI-INTELLECTUALISM” IS AN IMPORTANT OLQ (OFFICER LIKE QUALITY)

After the workshop was over – I had a delightful discussion with the charming young lady.

“I am sure you have heard of the term OLQ...” I asked her.

“Of course I know what is OLQ – it was drilled into us – OLQ means ‘Officer Like Qualities’...” she said. 

“Well – “Anti-intellectualism” is an important OLQ – yes – “regimented thinking” is a vital “Officer Like Quality” – and – if an officer uses his right brain and thinks creatively or “out of the box” – as they say – then he is doomed...” I told her.

In jest – I told her that during my Navy days – I always carried two brains inside me:

1. A “fauji brain” for regimented military thoughts

2. A “creative brain” for interesting thoughts where I could let my imagination run wild.

Most of the naval officers I met were cerebral types – but I did come across a few anti-intellectual specimens too.

If you are a “fauji” (serving or retired) – or a “faujan” – do tell us if you have come across some “just do as you are told – don’t use your brain” “anti-intellectual” types during your service in the military.

Like I said – the overly regimented Army is certainly more “anti-intellectual” than the Navy –  and most of the naval officers I came across were cerebral types – but I did meet a few “anti-intellectual” types in the Navy too – and about one such hilarious specimen – I will tell you in a subsequent blog post.

And – before I end – let me leave you with a famous saying: 

“Military Intelligence” is an “Oxymoron”

You agree – don’t you – the phrase “Military Intelligence” is a contradiction in terms – isn’t it...?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This is a spoof, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Abridged Revised and Updated Extract of my article THE CRAZY COMMODORE WITH A PHOBIA FOR “MANAGEMENT THOUGHTS” written by me Vikram Karve on 19 November 2013 and posted online in my various blogs including in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Posted by Vikram Karve at 11/19/2013 12:31:00 PM at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/11/humor-in-uniform-crazy-commodore-with.html  and revised version at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/03/humor-in-uniform-military-brain.html