Concept of Notional Loss – Story of the Man who wanted to have a Heart Attack

THE MAN WHO WANTED TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK

Theory of Notional Loss

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

One day – a man went to visit a patient in hospital.

The patient was his office colleague convalescing in hospital after heart surgery – following a massive heart attack.

Fascinated by the sophisticated and luxurious facilities in the hospital – the man asked his recuperating friend how much the heart surgery had cost him. 

“Over 5 lakhs...” the patient said.

“My God – 5 Lakhs – that’s expensive. How can you afford it...?”

“Medical Reimbursement...” the patient said.

“Medical Reimbursement...? Does that mean that you don’t have to pay any money for all this medical treatment...?”

“Of course I don’t have to pay from my own pocket – they pay everything. That is why I joined the medical health insurance scheme. All office staff are members of this scheme. You too are a member – aren’t you...? So even if you have a heart surgery – they will pay everything.”

“Really...? Is it true. If I have a heart attack right here – here and now – will they will pay for all my treatment...?” the man asked.

“Of course they will pay. You are a member of the health insurance scheme. You are entitled all medical treatment – just like me...” the patient said.

For some time – the man kept brooding.

He appeared to be in low spirits. 

Then suddenly – the man started shouting in the hospital: 

“I want to have a heart attack – I want to have a heart attack...”

Everyone was stunned by his strange behaviour. 

Doctors tried to calm him down.

But – the man kept on screaming loudly: 

“I want to have a heart attack – I want to have a heart attack...” 

So – they evicted him from the hospital.

Later – when he had cooled down – his wife and his friends asked him the reason for his crazy behaviour in the hospital.

“I have lost 5 Lakh Rupees...!!!” the man said.

“You have lost 5 lakh Rupees...? Where...? How did you lose Five Lakh Rupees...?” they all asked

“I lost 5 lakh rupees worth of medical reimbursement just because I did not have a heart attack. That is why I want to have a heart attack. So I will get 5 lakh rupees for a heart surgery and medical treatment which is my entitlement...” the man said.

And then – the man started shouting again: 

“I want to have a heart attack – I want to have a heart attack...”

Soon – the man became crazy. 

So – they admitted him into the psychiatric ward for treatment.

Of course – since he had gone crazy – he would receive “medical reimbursement” for the cost of “psychiatric treatment”.

So – at last – he had got pyrrhic justice.

The “notional loss” he had suffered because he had not had a heart attack – this “notional loss” would now be mitigated to some extent because he had gone crazy...! 

He wanted medical re-imbursement for “cardiac treatment”. 

Instead – he would now get medical re-imbursement for “psychiatric treatment”.

Yes – he had suffered a “notional loss” because he did not have a heart attack.

But now – since he had gone insane – he would make good at least a part of the “notional loss” he had suffered – since he would be reimbursed the cost of psychiatric treatment.

Dear Reader: 

Look back on your life and tell us: 

Have you “suffered” such “notional losses” too – because you did not fully avail of all perks/facilities you were entitled to...? 

PS: To end on a lighter note – a Military Veteran who was a strict Teetotaller – who never drank alcohol in his entire life – he told me that he had suffered great “notional loss” – because – he had never availed of the monthly Concessional CSD “Liquor Quota” during his entire Military Career of 35 years – and even now – after retirement – he continues to suffer “notional loss” since he does not draw his monthly “Liquor Quota”. 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh. 

2. This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Revised Version on My Story written be me long back in 1980s and posted online by me earlier at urls: http://creative.sulekha.com/heart-attack_74770_blog  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2010/11/notional-loss.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/12/do-you-want-to-have-heart-attack-humor.html and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/08/the-man-who-wanted-to-have-heart-attack.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/06/notional-loss-story.html etc

DIGITAL INDIA – Hype and Reality

DIGITAL INDIA – Hype and Reality

Musings

By

VIKRAM KARVE

After being elected to power by a huge mandate in May 2014 – Prime Minister Narendra Modi and his Ministers have taken many initiatives for the betterment of India.

One such initiative is “Digital India” – which envisages extensive use of information technology for better governance.

The positive effects of adopting technology in governance are visible in certain ministries/organizations – notably Indian Railways, Ministry of External Affairs (MEA) and many Municipal Bodies – which have optimally used Internet (and Social Media) to improve governance (e-governance) and speed up grievance redressal (online complaint management)

However – there are still some “laggards” who refuse to adopt modern technologies to improve governance – they prefer to remain antiquated and backward – and they continue to use the obsolescent “paper based system” instead of “online governance”.

To be successful – the “Digital India” initiative needs to be all-encompassing and must include all organizations (particularly government run organizations) – especially those organizations which provide services to citizens.

A few technophobic regressive organizations should not be allowed to derail or impede the “Digital India” initiative.

Recently – I discovered one such antiquated organization which is indifferent to the Prime Minister’s “Digital India” initiative – “United India Insurance Company Ltd” – which is a Government Public Sector Undertaking (PSU).

Let me tell you about my disappointing experience with “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

A few days ago – inspired by “Digital India” – I decided to avail the “online” option to buy a Travel Insurance Policy – instead of the traditional “Agent Hard-Copy” which I had used in the past for buying insurance policies.

In the past – I had taken a Travel Insurance Policy from “United India Insurance Company Ltd” in the past (via an agent).

So – I decided to take an “online policy” from the same insurance firm – “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

Accordingly – I opened the “United India Insurance Company Ltd” website on the internet and I saw an option for buying “online policies”.

So – I filled in the necessary online forms – and – I made the required online payment for the policy.

The payment was successful and I was allotted at “Transaction ID” by “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

I also received an SMS from my Bank that the amount had been debited to my account and credited to “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

I was given to understand that online insurance policies are generated instantly and forwarded by email immediately.

However – I did not receive any email from “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

Also – I did not receive any SMS intimation from “United India Insurance Company Ltd” regarding issue/generation of the online policy.

I decided to wait for a day.

Next morning – I checked my email.

There was no email from “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

I accessed the website of “United India Insurance Company Ltd” and navigated to the page titled “Download/Search Facility for Online Policies”.

I entered my “Transaction ID” and queried for the Status of my Online Policy.

The Status Report stated the online payment was “successful” (in the “Payment Gateway Information” column).

Under “Payment Process Status” the status was: “Your Payment Synced into our System”

Under the “Policy Generation Summary” the status was: “The policy is not yet generated”

This was 4 days ago.

Since then – there has been no communication from “United India Insurance Company Ltd” – No Email – No SMS – No Call – regarding my online policy.

Despite “successful payment” and “payment synced into system” – the status remains the same – and – the policy has still not been generated by “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

Online Policies are supposed to be generated immediately.

More than 4 days have passed – but – “United India Insurance Company Ltd” has still not generated my policy.

I have sent 3 reminder emails to “United India Insurance Company Ltd” on both the Email IDs: online.policy@uiic.co.in  and support.onlinepolicies@uiic.co.in  mentioned on “United India Insurance Company Ltd” website.

But – I have not received any reply to my emails from “United India Insurance Company Ltd” till today.

The “United India Insurance Company Ltd” Toll Free Helpline 180042533333 does not respond.

Most Private Firms use the Social Media (especially Twitter) effectively to engage with customers and resolve their grievances.

I have observed that many Government Organizations/Entities are active on the Social Media – especially on Twitter – and they respond to Tweets by citizens for grievance redressal and complaint management – besides disseminating information.

Notable among these techno-savvy organizations are Ministry of External Affairs (MEA) and Indian Railways – even the concerned Ministers personally tweet and respond to citizens.

However - “United India Insurance Company Ltd” seems to be an exception.

“United India Insurance Company Ltd” has got a Twitter Account (@UnitedIndiaInsu)

But – the “United India Insurance Company Ltd” Twitter Account seems to be dormant (the most “recent” tweet is on 07 March 2013 – more than three and a half years ago).

This indicates that “United India Insurance Company Ltd” does not believe in “Tweet Governance” which is being adopted in a big way as to facilitate “Digital India” by many progressive organizations.

I have tweeted to (@UnitedIndiaInsu) “United India Insurance Company Ltd” regarding my problem – but there was no response to my tweets from “United India Insurance Company Ltd”.

It seems to be a similar state of affairs on Facebook too.

CONCLUSION

1. I applied for a “United India Insurance Company Ltd” online policy on 11 Oct 2016. Payment was successful and “synced” into their system. Yet – the online policy has not been issued till today 15 Oct 2016 – more than 4 days after online payment. As per rules – online policies are required to be issued immediately and sent by email. But – “United India Insurance Company Ltd” has not sent any email or SMS regarding my policy.

2. “United India Insurance Company Ltd” does not respond to my emails.

3. “United India Insurance Company Ltd” does not respond to my Tweets.

I feel helpless.

What should I do…?

Even “United India Insurance Company Ltd” Toll Free Number is Unresponsive.

A friend suggested that I should write a hard-copy letter and send it by snail-mail (by postal service) to “United India Insurance Company Ltd” Head Office.

He feels that since “United India Insurance Company Ltd” is a Government PSU – “United India Insurance Company Ltd” may not have made a transition into the modern “Digital Age” – and – “United India Insurance Company Ltd” may still be in the antiquated “Paper Age”.

But – I cannot wait for “paper correspondence” – since I have to travel next week (for which I need the insurance policy).

So – since “United India Insurance Company Ltd” has not issued an online policy in a timely manner – the only immediate option for me is buy another policy from a Private Insurance Company – and later – I can initiate a protracted paper correspondence with “United India Insurance Company Ltd” for a refund.

But one thing is sure.

In future – I will avoid “United India Insurance Company Ltd” and other Government PSUs who refuse to adopt “Digital India”.

The whole nation is trying to move ahead with “Digital India” – and – many Government Entities have adopted “Digital India” in a big way.

Why do a few “techno-phobic” organizations like “United India Insurance Company Ltd” refuse to adopt modern technology…?

Why are they reluctant to be a part of “Digital India”…?

I hope the Government does not allow a few “bad apples” to undermine the “Digital India” effort which requires the participation of all to be a success.

All Government Entities (including archaic PSUs like “United India Insurance Company Ltd”) must be made adopt modern online technologies and make “Digital India” implementation a success.

Do you agree…?

PS:

Dear Reader – In case you know some someone in “United India Insurance Company Ltd” – will you be so good as to forward this post to him/her…?

If you do this – maybe “United India Insurance Company Ltd” will be kind enough to issue my online policy at the earliest and send it to me by email. Or – at least – they will show me the basic courtesy of replying to my email or send me an SMS informing me of the status.

Will “United India Insurance Company Ltd” adopt “Digital India”…?

Will they become active on the Social Media (Twitter)…?

Well– it seems a tall order – but – I am always optimistic… 

RETIREMENT PLANNING

I have been invited to deliver a talk on “Retirement Planning”.

Here is the gist of my talk:

MEANING OF RETIREMENT 

RETIREMENT = LEISURE + SECURITY

Ramblings of a Retired Mind

By

VIKRAM KARVE

RETIREMENT MEANS LEISURE WITH SECURITY

Yes – there are 2 essential attributes of retirement:

1. Leisure

2. Security

When you retire – you have plenty of LEISURE.

You must know how to enjoy your leisure.

However – in order to enjoy this leisure – you must have SECURITY.

The term “security” includes three types of security:

1. Financial Security

2. Physical Security

3. Emotional Security

Financial Security

You cannot enjoy the leisure you will have after you retire if you do not have enough money to live a reasonable standard of life after retirement (and also cater to essential needs like health and other responsibilities towards children etc).

That is why it is important to plan early and save enough money in order to ensure financial security before you retire – especially if you are not going to get a monthly pension. 

You must also ensure you have a health insurance plan and also some contingency funds to fall back upon in case you fall in some unforeseen financial distress. 

Financial planning for retirement must take into account increasing longevity especially in women who outlive their husbands in most cases.

Physical Security

You must choose a retirement home which provides you physical security. 

That is why it is important to choose a peaceful place with good law and order (a pensioners’ paradise) to settle down after you retire. 

A flat in a gated residential complex or in a senior citizens retirement community in a city will give you better security than living in an isolated bungalow in a far-off desolate place. 

Living in an apartment in a city or in a retirement community will also provide you with facilities and amenities to enjoy a better quality of life after you retire, especially in your old age.

Emotional Security

Gone are the days of the joint family system when a retired person got plenty of emotional security from his children and grandchildren who looked after elders.

Nowadays – if you are married – you have to rely on your spouse alone to give you emotional security.

Conclusion

Before you retire – you must ask yourself whether you have enough security during your retirement to enable you to enjoy the leisure you will get when you retire. 

Remember my definition of Retirement:

Retirement means Leisure with Security

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

A STORY I TOLD A LIFE INSURANCE AGENT

THE END OF THE WORLD

A STORY TO TELL SOMEONE WHO TRIES TO SELL YOU LIFE INSURANCE

By 

VIKRAM KARVE

Is someone hounding you and making your life miserable trying to sell you a life insurance policy which you do not want to buy.

Maybe you should tell that person to read this famous Mulla Nasrudin story called END OF THE WORLD:

END OF THE WORLD

An eminent group of academicians and scientists of all specializations who were passing by Mulla Nasrudin’s town. 

They had heard about Mulla Nasrudin’s fame as the “wise philosopher” so they decided to meet him. 

They sought an appointment with the great Mulla Nasrudin and he asked them to meet him at midnight.

So at the stroke of the midnight hour, they all  came to Mulla Nasrudin and said: “We have been travelling all over the world interacting with experts, researching, calculating and even contemplating for years trying to determine when the world will come to an end. Yet we still have not found out the answer. Tell us, Mulla Nasrudin, do you know when the end of the world will happen…?”

Nasrudin coolly answered: “Of course I know. In fact I have known that information for a long time.”

“What…? You know the answer…?” the dumbfounded scientists, academicians and specialists exclaimed and asked Nasrudin, “Are you sure…? Have you have really calculated when it will be the end of the world…?”

“Of course I know,” Nasrudin said nonchalantly, “I have calculated the precise moment when the world will come to an end.”

“Really…?” the astounded group of experts said incredulously, and then they all pleaded with Nasrudin, “Please tell us when the world will come to an end… please tell us… please share your knowledge with us…”

“Okay…I will tell you… the end of the world will be exactly when I die… yes, the moment I die, at that precise moment it will be the end of the world,” Mulla Nasrudin said confidently.

“When you die…? The end of the world will be the exact moment when you die…? Are you sure…? Are you certain that will be the end of the world…?” the bewildered scientists, academicians and specialists asked Mulla Nasrudin.

“Yes… The end of the world will be the moment I die – certainly for me it will be the end of the world…” Nasrudin said with finality.

Everyone looked at Mulla Nasrudin with silent awe, trying to digest this great truth.

So Mulla Nasrudin decided to break the deafening silence.

“For me, the end of the world will be the moment I die. And for you, the end of the world will be the moment you die,” Mulla Nasrudin declared with a triumphant wave of his hand.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013

Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review. 

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

NB:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2013 all rights reserved

Did you like this story?

I am sure you will like the 27 short stories from my recently published anthology of Short Fiction COCKTAIL
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About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
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Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramkarve@hotmail.com

Twitter: @vikramkarve

      

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