Friday, April 3, 2015

WHY WOMEN MARRY versus WHY MEN MARRY

I am a self-styled “Agony Aunt” and “Self Help” Expert – though it is me who is need of “Help”!

Here is post I wrote 5 years ago...

Have a Laugh...

WHY GIRLS WANT TO GET MARRIED versus WHY BOYS WANT TO GET MARRIED
Tongue-in-cheek Musings
By
VIKRAM KARVE

AGONY AUNT

I like playing Agony Aunt.

It is good fun.

I love to talk. 

I am a good listener.

Listening to others’ troubles seems to make my own troubles go away.

I love to talk to anyone who wants to talk to me.

Yes, talking to someone who needs comforting seems to make my own troubles go away…!

So I am quite happy when Alka calls up, “Are you free today…? I want to speak to you…”

“Sure,” I say, “in the evening…?”

“After work…?”

“Okay…I’ll wait for you in Polka Dots…at seven…”

At 7 o’clock in the evening I sit in the veranda of Polka Dots Café in Aundh sipping Iced Tea waiting for Alka to arrive.

There she is – Alka gets off her company bus which ferries her from her workplace in the IT Park at Hinjewadi to her chummery in Aundh – and she spots me, waves, walks briskly and sits on the chair opposite me.

“Thanks for coming,” she says.

“You are welcome,” I say, “But first let’s order…then we can talk…”

We order – Fish and Chips for me  and a Chicken Teriyaki for her – and then I say to her: “Tell me...what’s bothering you…?”

“Ashish…” she says, “he wants to do his MBA... ”

“That’s good…”

“I know – I have nothing against his doing MBA  but he wants to postpone our marriage…”

“Oh…”

“We have been seeing each other for seven years now – we have been going around since our first year in engineering college – we had decided to get married the moment we completed our B.Tech. and got a job – that was okay  I was getting much better offers but I joined the same company just to be with him  then he said let us finish our training – then he said let the probation period be over  then he kept dilly dallying. Every time I ask him: let’s get married” – he says let’s wait and be secure in our careers  and now this MBA bug has bit him – so I said let’s get married and you can do your MBA here in Pune – but he says NO  he wants to go to IIM  concentrate on his CAT  then focus on his MBA studies and come on top of his class…”

The food arrives. 

We start eating. 

There is silence for a while – and then Alka starts speaking, “How long can we continue like this…? I am almost twenty five now – so he’ll study for CAT for a year – then two more years of MBA –then he will say to me: let me settle down in my new job” – I feel very insecure in life by his indecision  Isn’t it high time we got married and settled down…?”

“I’ll speak to Ashish…” I say

That night I call Ashish over for a drink at our favourite watering hole in Baner. 

I talk about the conversation Alka had with me in Polka Dots and I tell him that Alka is afraid that he is going to dump her.

“Dump her…? What nonsense…? I love her – I want to marry her – but how can I explain? I want to be secure before I marry… Ashish says.

“Secure…?” I ask.

“You know that a mere B. Tech. degree isn’t enough these days – I barely managed to hold on to by job during the recession. I don’t feel secure in my job. I have to get an MBA from a top-notch institute like IIM – I have to get a good job – I have to do well in my life. That’s why I want to focus on studying for CAT and marriage at this stage will disturb my focus on studies. I must get into an IIM – or at least a top B-School – I will have to study hard – I will have to top the class to get the best placement. I am only twenty five now  there is plenty of time for marriage. I want to feel secure in my career before I make a commitment to marriage so that I can give the best to Alka and our would-be kids…”

So this is the basic marriage dilemma:
 
A girl wants to get married to feel secure
 
A boy wants to be secure before getting married


Do you agree with my patriarchal chauvinist views?

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 
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Disclaimer:
1. This is a spoof, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh. 
2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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Posted online by me Vikram Karve earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve on 07 August 2010 
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