“Teddy Bear” and “Sugar” – A Love Story

“TEDDY BEAR” AND “SUGAR”

A Love Story

By

VIKRAM KARVE

From my Creative Writing Archives:

One of my early pieces of Short Fiction – a story of changing relationships.

I wrote this story more than 13 years ago – in the year 2003.

I have updated, edited and abridged the story for online reading.

Do tell me if you like this simple love story...

“TEDDY BEAR” AND “SUGAR” – A Love Story by Vikram Karve

“Your relationship has become so demoralized by distrust that you two better break up rather than try to patch up...” I say to the man sitting in front of me.

 

“What...?” he says, looking surprised.

 

“Yes. It is better for you to divorce your wife – instead of living in perpetual suspicion like this. Why live a lie...?” I say.

 

“How can you say this? You are a marriage counsellor – you are supposed to save marriages – not break up marriages...” he says.

 

“But then what can I do if you don’t change your attitude?” I say in desperation to him, “You have to learn to trust your wife – and just stop being jealous, suspicious, possessive. Mutual trust is important in a marriage – especially a long distance marriage like yours.”

 

I look at the man sitting in front of me.

He is incredibly handsome – mid 30’s – maybe 40 – well groomed – sharp features accentuated by a smart neatly trimmed beard – clean brown eyes – he looked strong and confident – and his outward appearance betray no sign of what is going on inside him.

He looks at me longingly – in a lingering sort of way – that women secretly want men to look at them.

 

I blush.

I feel good at being admired by a handsome man.

But – I quickly compose myself.

In such vulnerable situations anything could happen – and I have to be careful – so I say to him in a firm dispassionate tone: “I think you better go now. It’s time for your flight to Singapore.”

 

“The Flight is delayed...” he says.

 

“You’re sure...?” I ask him.

 

“Of course I am sure. I am the pilot – the commander of the aircraft. I have to report after an hour...” he says.

 

“But I have to leave. It is almost check-in time...” I say.

 

“No! No! Please stay. There’s still 2 hours for your flight to London. Don't worry – I will get you checked-in – and I will have you upgraded to Business Class too. I will order some more coffee. There is something important that I want to tell you...” he pleads.

 

The airport restaurant is deserted at this late hour – the place wears a dark, eerie look – with just a few people huddled in muted whispers.

 

“I want to thank you for giving me this special appointment – agreeing to meet me here at such short notice,” he says.

 

“It’s okay. It was quite convenient for both of us to meet here at the airport – rendezvous enroute – catching our flights. A nice quiet discreet place – this airport restaurant...” I say.

 

He pauses for a moment – and then – he speaks in a guilty tone: “I did something terrible today.”

 

“What...?” I ask.

 

“I stole my wife’s cell-phone...” he says.

 

“Stole...? Did you say that you stole your wife’s mobile phone...?” 

“Yes.”

“I cannot believe it. You stole your wife’s mobile phone...? When...?” I ask him.

 

“Yes – I stole my wife’s mobile phone just before I left for the airport. I took her mobile phone from her purse. She was fast asleep. In fact – she must be still sleeping even now...”

 

“This is too much! Stealing your wife’s mobile. That was the most despicable thing to do. I don’t think we should talk any more. You need some serious help...” I say angrily.

I gulp down my coffee – and – I start to get up.

 

“No! No! Please listen. It’s those tell-tale SMS messages...!” he says.

 

“Tell-tale SMS messages...? What SMS messages...?” I ask him.

 

“From ‘Teddy Bear’...” he says.

 

“Teddy Bear...?” I ask.

 

“Someone she knows – ‘Teddy Bear’ – must be a secret name. My wife has saved his number. She keeps getting these SMS’s from ‘Teddy Bear’ – which she erases immediately...” he says.

“Are you saying that this ‘Teddy Bear’ keeps sending SMS’s your wife...?” I ask him.

"Yes. I think they are having a good time right behind my back the moment I take off on a flight. This ‘Teddy Bear’ and my wife are making a cuckold of me – and – they are having a rollicking love affair. This evening my wife was bathing while I was getting ready to leave for the airport. Her mobile cell-phone was lying on the bed – and – an SMS came from ‘Teddy Bear’ saying: “I am yearning for you. SPST...”

 

“SPST...? What’s that?” I ask.

 

“I don’t know. I called the number. A male voice said: ‘Hi Sugar...!’ – just imagine – he calls her ‘Sugar’ – I got so angry – that I immediately hung up in disgust. Then during dinner she kept getting calls and SMS’s – must be the same chap: ‘Teddy Bear’...”

 

“Your wife spoke to him – this ‘Teddy Bear’...? Did she call ‘Teddy Bear’...?” I ask.

 

“No. She did not speak to him in front of me. But she kept getting calls – I am sure ‘Teddy Bear’ was calling her – but my wife looked at the number – and she cut it off. It happened 4 or 5 times. Then my wife switched her mobile to silent – and she put in her purse...” he says.

 

“Did you ask her who it was...?”

 

“No.”

 

“You should have asked her. It may have been a colleague, a friend. That’s your problem – you keep imagining things and you have stopped communicating with her. Ask her next time – and I’m sure everything will clear up...”

 

“No! No! I am sure she is having an affair with this ‘Teddy Bear’ chap. Had it not been for the last minute delay in my flight – I wouldn’t have been home at that time – and the coast would have been clear for ‘Teddy Bear’...” he says. 

I look at the man in front of me – the handsome Airline Pilot. 

For some time – he remains silent.

And then – suddenly – the man in front of me just breaks down – with tears pouring down his cheeks – his voice is uncontrollable as he says: 

“I hate my wife – she is a bloody cheat – the moment I take off on my flight – she starts cheating on me...”

 

It is a bizarre sight. 

A tough looking man looking totally shattered, weeping inconsolably.

 

“Please...” I say, “please control yourself. And  I think you better not fly a plane in this state.”

 

“I think you’re right,” he says, recovering his composure, “I am in no mood to fly.”

He takes out two cell-phones from his shirt pocket. 

He looks at them.

Then – he keeps one mobile phone on the table – and – on the other mobile phone – he dials a number – from his talk it appears that he is talking to the standby pilot.

Then – he calls a few other numbers – and – he tells them he is unwell – so – he is going off the roster.

 

He disconnects and keeps the mobile phone in his pocket. 

There is one mobile phone lying on the table.

 

“Your wife’s cell-phone...?” I ask – pointing to the sleek mobile phone he has kept on the table.

 

“Yes...” he says.

 

“She’ll be missing it...” I say.

 

“No. She’ll be fast asleep. I’ll go back and put it in her purse...” he says.

We sit for some time in silence. 

He looks as if he is in a trance – a vacuous blank look in his eyes. 

Years of counselling has taught me that in such moments – it is best to say nothing. 

So – I just pick up my cup – and I sip what remains of my coffee.

Suddenly he gets up and he says: “I think I will go home...” 

Then – he quickly turns and walks away.

It is only after he has gone – as I keep my coffee cup back on the table – that I notice that he has forgotten the cell-phone on the table – his unfaithful wife’s cell-phone. 

Yes – the Airline Pilot has forgotten his wife’s mobile phone on the table. 

An idea strikes me.

At first – I am a bit hesitant.

Then – curiosity takes charge of me – and – I pick up the mobile phone.

Hurriedly – I click on ‘contacts’.

Then – I press ‘T’

I scroll down – and – I quickly find ‘Teddy Bear’ – and – I press the ‘call’ button.

A few rings – someone picks up. 

I instantly recognize my husband’s baritone voice at the other end: 

“Hey ‘Sugar’ – where are you...? Why aren’t you answering my calls...? Did you get my SMS –  ‘SPST’ – ‘Same Place Same Time’ – and – ‘Sugar’ darling – why did you give me a blank call...?” 

 

I cannot believe this. 

My very own husband is ‘Teddy Bear’ – and – he is having a rollicking affair with ‘Sugar’ – the wife of my patient – the Airline Pilot. 

Yes – ‘Teddy Bear’ is my husband.

‘Sugar’ is the Airline Pilot’s wife. 

And – ‘Teddy Bear’ and ‘Sugar’ are having an affair. 

My own husband is having an extramarital affair with my patient’s wife.

It is happening right under my nose – and – I am totally clueless. 

It is unimaginable – incredulous.

I feel shattered. 

My very own world comes tumbling down like a pack of cards.

 

I cannot begin to describe the emotions that overwhelm me at that moment.

But – I will tell you what I do.

 

I put the mobile cell-phone in my purse. 

Yes – I “steal” the mobile phone belongining to the Airline Pilot’s wife (which he has stolen from her).

I pick up Sugar’s mobile phone, switch it off and put it in my purse.

Then – I walk briskly to the check-in counter.

And – without looking back – I quickly check in – and – I board my flight to London.

And – Dear Reader – as you read this – at this very moment – I am on my way to London to present my research paper on “The Efficacy of Marriage Counselling in the Alleviation of Marital Discord” at the International Conference of Counsellors and Therapists. 

Sitting in the aircraft – in my mind’s eye – I imagine the possible scenarios. 

Has ‘Sugar’ discovered that her mobile phone is missing...? 

Has the Airline Pilot found out that he has lost his wife Sugar’s mobile phone...? 

Finding Sugar’s phone “switched off” – did my husband ‘Teddy Bear’ rush to the Airline Pilot’s house to meet his lover ‘Sugar’...?

Did the Airline Pilot catch them red handed “in flagrante delicto”...? 

Or – will my husband ‘Teddy Bear’ keep waiting for ‘Sugar’ at their usual rendezvous (SPST – Same Place Same Time)...?

The possibilities are endless.

Better for me not to think about it.

Let things take their own course – why should I stew in suspense...?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in this story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This a revised and abridged version of my story TEDDY BEAR AND SUGAR written by me more than 13 years ago in the year 2003 and earlier posted online by me on my blogs a number of times including at urls: http://creative.sulekha.com/teddy-bear-and-sugar_485538_blog  and   and http://vikramwamankarve.blogspot.in/2010/06/infidelity-fiction-short-story.html http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2010/08/teddy-bear-and-sugar.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2011/03/efficacy-of-marriage-counselling-in.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/09/teddy-bear-and-sugar-clandestine.html and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2011/07/marriage-counselling-theory-and.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/10/teddy-bear-and-sugar-clandestine-love.html etc

Humor in Uniform – Are Officers Allowed to Eat “Pani Puri” (Gol Gappa)

Humor in Uniform 

The Story of “Colonel Blimp” and Pani Puri 

“PONGO”

One of the perils of “jointmanship” is that the numerically smaller services – the Navy and the Air Force – are losing their unique identity – and – the Army is trying to make everyone a “Pongo” – under the guise of “standardisation”.

Someone told me that that the traditional “Subtle” Navy Parade Drill was changed a few years ago to be in conformance with rather “Brash” Army Drill Practice.

The Navy has imitated the Army and introduced Army Style Collar Tabs on its uniforms for senior officers – and made the Naval Uniforms more “showy” – like the Army – by introducing various accoutrements and badges – and hardly any Navy Officer now wears the traditional simple No. 8 Navy Shirt and Shorts Uniform (“half-pant”) which is most comfortable and apt for the tropics.

Earlier – you could easily distinguish between a Sailor and a “Pongo”.

In most cases – a Naval Officer would sport a full-set beard or sideburns till the bottom of the ear-lobe – and have a decent length of hair.

Now – I have observed that most young Naval Officers prefer to have Army Style Crew Cuts – and very few Navy Officers sport traditional flowing full-set beards.

Earlier – “Pongos” in white uniform were quite rare.

Now – almost every Sailor looks like a “Pongo”.

Let me delve into my my “Humor in Uniform” Archives and tell you a story of one such “Pongo” in white uniform.

But before that – let me tell you why army-men are called “Pongos”.

Yes – “Pongo” is naval slang for an army soldier.

Why is an Armyman called a “Pongo”...?

Well – there are many apocryphal stories on the origins of the term “Pongo”.

Here is one such yarn that I heard long back from an old “Sea Dog”.

He told me that the term “Pongo” originated in the Royal Navy to denote an infantryman. 

As per a myth – the “Pongo” was a unique ape. 

When he sensed danger or felt scared – the “Pongo” did not climb trees like most apes or monkeys normally do.

But the “Pongo” would dig holes in the earth and hide himself in the ground – in the same way as infantrymen dug in and entrenched themselves in the ground when they were under attack in battle.

Another similar yarn says that “Pongo” is derived from the archaic name for the Orangutan – which had the habit of digging holes in the ground for no apparent reason – and then filling the holes back. 

The Sailors probably observed Army Soldiers digging away – and hence the nickname “Pongo” for Army Soldiers.

Sorry for the digression, Dear Reader.

Here is the story of a “Pongo” in the Navy.

Have a Laugh !!!

“COLONEL BLIMP” AND PANI PURI

A Fictional Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE 

THE OLQ OBSESSED KILLJOY “PONGO” IN WHITE UNIFORM

Almost 40 years ago – way back in the 1970’s – when we were young Sub Lieutenants – Trainees at a “Stone Frigate” – we had a “Colonel Blimp” type Training Officer. 

Though he was only a few years senior to us – he was a pompous snob with rather archaic ultra-conservative conformist views.

This officer was truly a “Relic of the Raj”.

A quintessential Military Archetype – a typical “Sainik” School and ex-NDA type – he had seen very less of the civilian world.

As far as he was concerned – like a “frog in a well” – the “Fauj” (Military) was the “be all and end all” of his life.

In fact – he was so “OG” – that we thought that he was better suited for the Army – rather than for the Navy.

Yes – he was more of a “spit and polish” prim and proper “Pongo” – than a carefree happy-go-lucky Sailor. 

He would have been better off wearing Army Olive Green (OG) – rather than donning Navy Whites.

His favourite pastime was to deliver sermons on military conduct – and give us moral lectures on OLQ (Officer Like Qualities) 

He would pontificate about service etiquette and social graces – and how we must conduct ourselves as officers.

But one thing was sure.

He practiced what he preached.

And – he preached what he practiced. 

His turn-out was spotless – and his “military” bearing was always immaculate – his “officer-like conduct” was unblemished – and he always put “service before self”. 

But for us young happy-go-lucky youngsters who wanted to enjoy life – this “Colonel Blimp” was a big pain in the neck. 

OFFICERS DO NOT EAT “PANI PURI”

One evening while on liberty (shore leave) – we were enjoying eating delicious Pani Puri (Gol Gappa) at a roadside stall.

“Colonel Blimp” who was driving by on his scooter saw us eating Pani Puri – and worse – we were eating at a roadside stall.

He looked totally shocked and appalled.

But he did not say anything there – but just drove by on his scooter. 

Next morning he lined us up – and gave us what in Naval parlance is called a “bottle” – a very severe reprimand and scolding which I can remember even today: 

“How can officers behave like this?” 

“You uncivilized buggers were eating Pani Puri at a roadside stall...?” 

“It is just not done...!!!” 

“Officers must have proper class. You are no longer college students. As officers – you must dine in good decent restaurants.” 

“Remember that your conduct is being watched at all times.” 

“As Officers – you are expected to conduct yourselves with proper dignity.”

“Officers are not expected to hang out like hooligans in the open – Officers are not supposed to eat junk food like Pani Puri at roadside stalls.”

He went on and on and on and on.

Then – after he had finished his tirade – he admonished us: “You bloody “riff-raff” are not fit to go ashore. So – I am stopping your liberty as a punishment.”

So – as punishment for our foodie escapades – “Colonel Blimp” stopped our liberty.

Now – we could no longer go out and enjoy the delights the city had to offer. 

Thus – we had no choice but to spend the rest of our training period drowning our sorrows in the bar.

5 YEARS LATER 

New Delhi

A few years later – on a winter evening in Delhi – my wife and I walked down from our flat in Curzon Road Apartments on Kasturba Gandhi Marg to Bengali Market for our customary evening “tiffin” snacking.

Suddenly we spotted “Colonel Blimp” at the famous Chaat Stall in Bengali Market. 

Standing next to him was a beautiful woman.

The beautiful woman was eating Pani Puri

“Colonel Blimp” was looking at the gorgeous lady in a rather cold and disapproving sort of way.

But this did not seem to bother the ravishing beauty – and she was thoroughly enjoying herself eating Pani Puri.

She was eating pani puri after pani puri – and slurping her tongue – and smacking her lips in delight.

I could not miss this opportunity – so I walked up to “Colonel Blimp” – and I introduced my wife.

“Colonel Blimp” introduced the gorgeous woman as his fiancée.

“Hey Guys – care for some Pani Puri...?” the lovely lady asked us.

This was an offer I could not refuse – so I said: “Sure – we would love to have Pani Puri.” 

And then – all of us (except “Colonel Blimp”) – relished plate after plate of lip-smacking pani puri and chaat

Yes – we gorged on pani puri and all types of delicious chaat 

We all stood on the road and ate pani puri and chaat – except “Colonel Blimp”. 

Yes – the Killjoy OLQ Obsessed Pongo “Colonel Blimp” was the only one who did not eat Pani Puri. 

He looked at us with discomfiture.

He staunchly refused our repeated invitations to join us in eating the delicious mouthwatering Pani Puri and chaat. 

While leaving – “Colonel Blimp” gave me a stern disapproving look.

I knew he was itching to deliver his stock moral lecture – his standard sermon on “OLQ”.

But then – in his rule-book – “it was just not done” to bullshit juniors in front of ladies. 

So – I was spared the agony of a public scolding.

On our way back – I told my wife the story of “Colonel Blimp”.

My wife was was sure that the Killjoy OLQ obsessed Pongo “Colonel Blimp” would dump his fun-loving “un-officer-like” fiancée – as they seemed to be most incompatible for each other. 

But – to our surprise – we soon got an invitation for their wedding. 

Of course – his wedding reception was held in the service institute – and everything at the wedding reception was done in a most “officer like manner”

Colonel Blimp’s wedding reception was an extremely decorous and most formal occasion – as if it were an official party. 

His newly wedded wife was conducting herself in a very prim and proper manner.

We were convinced that OLQ Obsessed Pongo “Colonel Blimp” had taken charge of his wife and indoctrinated her on the finer aspects of “OLQ”, social graces and service etiquette – and he had drilled into her as to what was expected of her as a typical Naval Officer’s wife.

It seemed that the OLQ Obsessed Pongo “Colonel Blimp” had converted the fun loving vivacious young girl into a quintessential “NWWA Type Navy Wife”. 

ARE OFFICERS ALLOWED TO EAT “PANI PURI” (GOL GAPPA)...?

A few days later – one evening – my wife and I were walking down from Kota House towards India Gate on Shahjahan Road.

Suddenly we saw Pongo “Colonel Blimp” eating Pani Puri at the famous UPSC Chaat Wala Stall – along with his vivacious wife. 

I could not believe my eyes. 

Yes – Pongo “Colonel Blimp” was actually relishing Pani Puri on a roadside stall.

The moment he saw us – he waved to us and invited us over for some Chaat and Pani Puri 

I was stunned.

This was an invitation we could not refuse. 

It was great to see Pongo “Colonel Blimp” standing on the roadside – smiling and laughing with abandon – while he ate Pani Puri and Chaat at the roadside stall.

The metamorphosis was amazing.

It seemed that Pongo “Colonel Blimp” had lost all his stiff military “OG-ness” – and he was behaving like a normal “civilian” human being.

He was thoroughly enjoying himself – digging into chaat – and then popping pani puris  into his mouth – eating gol gappa after gol gappa – in a very carefree manner – totally oblivious of the surroundings.

The vivacious girl had succeeded in transforming the spit and polish, prim and proper, OLQ obsessed killjoy Pongo “Colonel Blimp” into a carefree happy-go-lucky Sailor.

I have seen many officers change for the better after marriage.

And – of course – some officers change for the worse after marriage.

Like my carefree “devil-may-care” happy-go-lucky coursemate – who suddenly became ambitious and career conscious after marriage.

But that’s another story...

For now – let us enjoy the “Pani Puri” story of OLQ Obsessed Killjoy Pongo “Colonel Blimp” and have a laugh...

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This blog post is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)