Showing posts with label unhappy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unhappy. Show all posts

Friday, January 12, 2018

Inspirational “Tonic” from Swami Vivekananda

HOW TO BE HAPPY
INSPIRATIONAL WISDOM FROM SWAMI VIVEKANANDA
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Today  January 12  is the birth anniversary of Swami Vivekananda (12 January 1863 – 4 July 1902).

I first learnt about Swami Vivekananda  sometime in the 1960’s  when I was a small boy  and my father had taken us to visit Belur Math near Kolkata (then called Calcutta). 

At Belur Math – I acquired a tiny pocket book called “Thus Spake Vivekananda”.

Whenever the chips were down 
 or I felt dejected  I referred to the inspiring gems of wisdom – distilled from the complete works of Swami Vivekananda  for instant motivation and strength.

On the occasion of his birth anniversary  let me tell you about my favourite saying of Swami Vivekananda – which inspired me – and which I try to implement in my day-to-day living. 


AN INSPIRATIONAL GEM OF WISDOM FROM SWAMI VIVEKANANDA

Here is an inspirational gem of wisdom, a phrase, from the sayings of Swami Vivekananda:
 
Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually  reject as poison
 
I feel that the word “weak” is all encompassing.

The term “weak” embraces anything that creates in you a stressful situation.

Thus – “weakness” includes all negative emotions – and negative feelings like anger, irritation, fury, worry, anxiety, frustration, despondency, depression, demoralization etc – in a nutshell – any emotion that causes you unhappiness.

These negative emotions disturb your inner tranquility and equanimity – they drain you emotionally and intellectually  and make you feel “weak”  just like physical weakness. 


UNHAPPINESS IS WEAKNESS

Unhappiness is a negative emotion which drains you.

Hence  Unhappiness is Weakness.

Unhappiness is Poison for the soul.

Conversely  Happiness is Strength.

Happiness is Tonic for the soul.

Now – Dear Reader  how do you “reject as poison” – the “weakness” of unhappiness...?

The first step is to identify your “Unhappiness Creators”


IDENTIFY YOUR UNHAPPINESS CREATORS

Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place  close your eyes  introspect  and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative, unhappy and stressed out. 

Yes – think of all the things and people that create negative emotions within you. 

Reflect and introspect on all your unhappiness-creators and unhappy situations. 

These unhappiness creators can be anything  tangible and intangible  things, activities, persons etc.

“Unhappiness Creators” include:

1. Toxic individuals and incompatible persons  who irritate, annoy and hassle you.
 
2. Foods and Beverages  which do not suit you – and which are physically detrimental to your health and well-being.
 
3. Activities  social and personal  which may inititally appear pleasurable  but which actually drain you out.
 
4. Technology and Gadgets  like your cell-phone  which disturb your peace of mind.

5. Strained Relationships  which are a source of unhappiness and cause you stress and anger.

6. Any activity – or a thing  that causes a guilty conscience within you

7. Disagreeable Persons and Unpleasant Activities – which are a stimulus for negative emotions – like anger, worry, fear, etc – and create negative vibes within you.

Dear Reader – Please close your eyes  introspect – and think about all aspects of your life  your work life  your home life  your social life.

Think about all the persons, activities and things that generate negative vibes, create stress and unhappiness in you – all the things that make you feel “weak”

Then  follow Swami Vivekananda's advice: 

Anything that makes you weak  physically, intellectually, and spiritually  reject as poison 

Yes  you can do it in actual life.

Just “reject” all these “poisonous” things and people – by avoiding them as far as possible.

Make an exhaustive list of all your 
“unhappiness creators”  all the things and people that make you “weak” - and try to reject them as “poison”.  
 
At first  you may be a bit skeptical about this approach.

But – when you start implementing this mantra in your day-to-day life  you will be surprised by the extent to which it is in your own control to prevent unhappiness.


SAY NO TO UNHAPPINESS CREATORS and WELCOME HAPPINESS CREATORS

While  on the one hand:

You reject the things that make you weak and unhappy

simultaneously  on the other hand:

You must reinforce the things that make you feel strong and happy

Say NO to UNHAPPINESS CREATORS

Say YES to HAPPINESS CREATORS  

Yes  if unhappiness is weakness” – then happiness is strength.
 
So – simultaneously  reflect and contemplate.

Make a list of things and persons that give you strength and joy – and make you happy and productive.

In your “Happiness Creators” list – include all the things and people that create positive feelings in you

Then – try to devote maximum time and energy towards doing these positive things – and interacting with these morale boosting people – that give you strength – and make you feel good and happy.  


MANTRA FOR HAPPINESS (and UNHAPPINESS) - IN A NUTSHELL
 
To put it in a nutshell  if you want to be happy:

1. Try your best to generate happiness vibes by doing things which make you “strong” and happy 

2. Try to reduce or even eliminate negative unhappiness vibes by rejecting” things which make you weak” and unhappy. 

(And if you want to be unhappy, just do the opposite  keep wallowing in negative vibes by encouraging your unhappiness creators and avoiding your happiness creators).


HOW TO CREATE HAPPINESS and HOW TO CREATE UNHAPPINESS

Whenever I feel unhappy, I realize that it is because I have allowed myself to be overwhelmed by my unhappiness creators.

And – the moment I envelop myself with my happiness creators  I start feeling happy.

Remember this saying of Swami Vivekananda:

Anything that makes you weak”  physically, intellectually, and spiritually  reject as poison 

Conversely, I say: 

Anything that makes you feel strong”  imbibe as nectar

Implementing this inspiring gem of wisdom from Swami Vivekananda is breathtaking in its simplicity. 

Try it – experiment – discover your happiness creators and unhappiness creators.

Start making your two lists – and then you know what to do.

This works for me – and I am sure it will work for you. 

I do feel stressed out and unhappy at times  but I know why  and I know what to do. 

So – I try my best to make my unhappiness creators disappear – and I overwhelm myself with happiness creators.

Wish you a stress-free life filled with happiness.

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 
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Disclaimer:
All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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Tuesday, December 18, 2012

HOUSE and HOME


HOUSE AND HOME
By
VIKRAM KARVE


HOUSE

A house is an inanimate structure whereas a home is a place you live in. 

A house is a tangible entity. 


HOME

A home comprises both the animate and inanimate and includes both tangibles and intangible attributes

You have to live in a house to make it a home

But that is not enough. 

There two vital attributes which epitomize a home. 


1. Firstly, you must always feel like going home

Yes, you must feel happy to be in your home. Your home must the best place in the world for you


2. Secondly, your home must always heartily welcome you

Your home must also feel happy when you are home. 

Whenever you come home you must get a feeling that your home is welcoming you and is happy that you have come home. 

Your home always wants you to come home and your home feels happy when you are inside your home.



HAPPY HOME

If you have a Happy Home, you will be able feel these two types of positive vibes:

1. When you arrive home your home always welcomes you with open arms and wants you to be there.

2. You yourself feel welcome in your home and for you your home is the best place in the world. You love being home than anywhere else. 


In a nutshell:

You must be happy in your home 

and 

Your home must be happy to have you home.


WHAT IS A HOME

A home comprises:

1. Tangible things like a house, furniture, décor,  appliances, humans (like family, relatives, other people) and other living beings like pets

and

2. Intangibles like emotions and vibes and atmosphere


HOME VIBES


A good home generates positive vibes in you

and 

You in turn generate positive vibes inside your home 


Your home should be the best place in the world.


UNHAPPY HOMES

Some people are not so lucky. 

They hate going home. 

Yes, I have actually seen some people who do not want to go home.

And probably their homes too do not welcome them and hate them coming home. 

Some unfortunate people are not happy in their homes

and 

Their homes too are not happy to have them come home 


Such people who have unhappy homes find solace outside their homes and try to avoid going home except for the minimum inescapable time. 

Some become workaholics and prefer remaining in office for long hours rather than go home early.

Some hang around drinking in bars and drowning their sorrows.

Some hang out with friends and colleagues.

Some indulge in frequent partying and socializing as this keeps them away from home.

Some immerse themselves in outdoor activities.

Some travel a lot to escape from their home.

Some find other escape routes to remain outside their home as long as possible. 

(By the way, if you love to drink and if you love your home too, you will know that the best place to have a drink is in your own home. Since I always loved my home, I always preferred enjoying my drinks at home rather than in some bar or club) 

I once knew a man who, after work, used to go to his club and drink there with his friends and come home drunk at midnight when everyone in his family was asleep. 

Surprisingly, his wife and children preferred it that way too. 

In fact, in many cases I have seen that a father or some person in the family generates so much negative vibes in his home that the other members of the family feel uncomfortable when he is home. 

Yes, just one person generating negative vibes can destroy the entire atmosphere in a home.

Now, mostly in the case of such a person, his home too generates negative vibes towards him so too he prefers being outside as he too does not find it a Happy Home. 

Negative vibes in a home can happen due to conflict between family members or stressful relationships. 

Negative vibes can also occur in a home due to some other factors like a gloomy or demoralizing atmosphere caused by illness, poverty or misfortune.


Ask yourself: Do you have a HAPPY HOME ?

If the answer is NO then find out why is it so. 

Is it due to some person? 

Or is it due to some other reason.

Do you not feel like going to your home? 

Does your home generate negative vibes towards you?

Is your home not the best place in the world? 

Or, do you find some other place like your office or your favourite place to hang out a much better place than your home? 

Are you more comfortable outside your home than inside your home?

Or do you feel that your home does not welcome you or like you to come home? Does your home generate negative vibes towards you when you come home?

Do you feel that you generate negative vibes in the atmosphere whenever you enter your home?

Once you have found out the reasons you must do something about it. 

Yes, you must try to mitigate the sources of negative vibes and enhance the happiness vibes

Then, you will have a HAPPY HOME.

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2012
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.


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About Vikram Karve

A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional  and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

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Email: vikramwamankarve@gmail.com
      
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