Sunday, October 31, 2010

PASSION and COMPASSION

PASSION and COMPASSION
Food for Thought
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Here is one of favourite teaching stories – a story which elucidates the difference between Passion and Compassion.

Two Monks were once travelling together on a long journey. It was the monsoon season and it was raining heavily when they suddenly reached a flooded stream where they saw a beautiful woman who wanted to cross the stream but was afraid as she was wary of the strong current.

On seeing the monks the beautiful woman asked them if they could help her cross the stream.

The first monk hesitated, but the other one quickly picked her up onto his shoulders, transported her across the water, and put her down on the other side.

The beautiful woman thanked him and departed.

As the monks continued on their way, the first monk was brooding and preoccupied. After a while, he could restrain himself no longer, and unable to hold his silence, he admonished the second monk who had carried the woman, “Brother, our spiritual training teaches us to avoid any contact with women. We monks don’t go near females, especially young and lovely ones, but you picked up that beautiful woman on your shoulders and carried her all the way!”

“Brother,” the second monk replied, “I left the woman back there. Why are you are still carrying her?"


Tell me, Dear Reader, is this the difference between passion and compassion?

Maybe there is some more profound meaning in this story too…

VIKRAM KARVE 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

TOOLS OF THE TRADE

TOOLS OF THE TRADE
Ancient Wisdom
A Teaching Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Here is a Ancient Wisdom Story...

Concerned at the increasing drunkenness and alcoholism in his kingdom, a famous king imposed strict prohibition on wine and liquor.
Earlier most people in that kingdom used to make their own liquor at home. For this they had all the paraphernalia for distilling home-made liquor, and though they had stopped distilling liquor at home after prohibition was imposed, many such innocent people were arrested merely for possession of vats and distillery apparatus in their houses and they were punished severely in the same terms as those actually caught making illegal illicit liquor.

The Prime Minister advised the King not to be so severe with those people who merely had vats in their homes and were not actually distilling liquor but the king would not budge saying that even those having the tools of the trade deserved punishment.

One day,the king was driving his chariot along with his Prime Minister in the country when they saw a young man sitting under a tree.

“Have that man arrested…!” the Prime Minister told the King.

“What has he done…?” asked the king in puzzlement.

“That man is going to commit adultery…!” the Prime Minister proclaimed.

“How do you know…?” the king asked perplexed.

“He has the tools of the trade, the tools of adultery, just as those people have their vats…!” 

The king broke out into a loud laugh and ordered that the people arrested for mere possession of vats be released immediately.

VIKRAM KARVE 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

PREVENTIVE ACTION IS BETTER THAN CORRECTIVE ACTION a Mulla Nasrudin Story



PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE
A Mulla Nasrudin Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE 


Mulla Nasrudin called a small boy and told him to get water from the well. 

While giving the small boy an earthenware pot to get the water, Mulla Nasrudin looked into the eyes of the small boy and said, “Make sure you don’t break the pot,” and then suddenly he gave the boy a tight slap.

A shocked spectator asked Nasrudin, "Why did you hit the boy? How can you punish someone who hasn’t done anything wrong?"

“Because, you fool,” said Nasrudin, “what is the point of punishing the boy after he broke the pot...? ”

VIKRAM KARVE 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.



Saturday, October 30, 2010

THE DISEASE TO PLEASE

THE DISEASE TO PLEASE
A Mulla Nasrudin Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE


As long as you live your life in such a way that your happiness is dependent upon things you cannot control, you will be a puppet in the hands of external circumstances and entities.

Similarly, if you are obsessed with seeking approval of others and always worried about pleasing others and your actions are guided by what other people would say (The LOG KYA KAHENGE syndrome) it looks like you may be falling victim to The Disease to Please and it is high time you read this Mulla Nasrudin Story.



Mulla Nasrudin and his son were travelling with their donkey.

Nasrudin preferred to walk while his son sat on the donkey.


Soon they passed a group of bystanders, and one of them scoffed, “Look at that selfish boy. The hale-and–hearty young son is riding on the donkey while his poor old father is forced to walk alongside. What disgraceful behaviour? And it is so disrespectful. What a horrible and spoiled child!”


Mulla Nasrudin and his son felt so embarrassed by these comments that they quickly switched places.


Now Mulla Nasrudin rode on the donkey while his son walked.


Soon they passed another group of people. “Oh, just look at that, what detestable behaviour!” one of them exclaimed pointing to Mulla Nasrudin. “That poor young boy has to walk while his shameless father rides the donkey! That horrible man should be ashamed of himself for the way he is treating his son. What a heartless father! It is appalling!”


Nasrudin was extremely upset to hear this. He wanted to avoid anybody else’s scorn, so decided that both he and his son ride the donkey at the same time and asked his son to sit along with him on the donkey.


As they both rode on the donkey, they passed another group of people. “That man and his son are so cruel,” one bystander said. “Just look at how they are forcing that poor donkey to bear the weight of two people. They have no consideration for the poor mute animal. Cruel merciless scoundrels, that’s what they are!”


Nasrudin heard this and told his son, “I guess the only way we can avoid the criticism of others is for both of us to walk.”


“I suppose you are right,” the son replied.


So they got off the donkey and started walking on foot.


But as they passed another group of people, they heard them laughing. “Ha, ha, ha,” the group jeered. “Look at those two fools. They are so stupid that both of them are walking under this scorching hot sun and neither of them is riding the donkey…! Have you ever seen such stupid idiots…? What morons…!”


Whatever Mulla Nasrudin and his son did someone or the other found fault and made fun of them... the criticism and comments of people continued forever, iterating and reiterating, and in the end the exasperated Mulla Nasrudin and his son were finally seen carrying the donkey on their heads…and everyone was laughing at them…!



So, Dear Reader, the next time you are overcome by the disease to please and feel governed by a desire to seek approval of others for something you want to do, feel like pleasing others to the detriment of your own needs, just remember this Mulla Nasrudin story, listen to your inner voice, seek your own approval, and act in accordance with your own conscience.

Log kya kahenge...?


Don’t worry... Kuch to log kahenge, logon ka kam hai kehena…



VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2010
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.

VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU and The Lawrence School Lovedale, is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.

Foodie Book: Appetite for a Stroll

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com

Academic and Creative Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com

Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve

Email: vikramkarve@sify.com

POWER and DESIRE

POWER and DESIRE 
An Apocryphal Story 
By 
VIKRAM KARVE

 
Here is an apocryphal story I had read long back about Alexander the Great and his encounter with the Greek philosopher Diogenes.

 
Alexander the Great, the Emperor of the World, who had conquered all lands and seas and considered himself the “son of a God” and before whom all knelt in veneration and reverence, one day early in the morning, was riding with his army through Greece. 

Suddenly he saw a man lying naked in the sand by the side of a river basking in the early morning sunlight. 

Curious, Alexander rode towards the naked man and sat imposingly on his horse towering over the emaciated prostrate man.

The Emperor Alexander was shocked to observe that the naked man seemed to be totally indifferent to the distinguished visitor and appeared nonchalantly oblivious of the bountiful entourage and captivating presence and charisma of the great Emperor. 

The stranger remained prostrate and made no attempt to get up and pay obeisance to the Emperor.

In fact the prostrate naked man continued lying down and totally ignored Alexander the Great sitting majestically on his horse. 

An angry soldier shouted at the naked man, “You there – do you know in whose presence you are…?” 

“Who is he…?” the prostrate man answered lazily, without the stir, making no move to get up. 

The astonished soldier proclaimed, “Wretched man, you are in the presence of His Exalted Highness Alexander the Great – Emperor of the World.”

“Oh,” the naked sunbather said impassively, continuing to lie down. He casually looked up at Alexander the Great mounted imposingly on his horse and said, “I am Diogenes.”  

“Ah, so you are the eccentric philosopher Diogenes…!” Alexander exclaimed, “I have always wanted to meet you – I have heard so many stories about you. Diogenes, I am impressed. I will grant you anything you wish. What do you desire…? Tell me Diogenes, what do you want, ask for anything in the world and it will be yours…” 

Still lying prostrate on the sand, Diogenes looked Emperor Alexander in the eye and said to him, “Please could you move a little to the side and get out of my sunlight, because you are blocking the sun and spoiling my sunbath. That is all I want from you…” 

 
Power is the reciprocal of desire, isn’t it…?
 
You cannot have power over someone who desires nothing from you…!
 
Think about it…

VIKRAM KARVE 
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2010
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

SPEAKING UNDER OATH A Mulla Nasrudin Story


SPEAKING UNDER OATH
A Mulla Nasrudin Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE


Mulla Nasrudin was a witness in a court case. He was asked to take the customary oath that he would speak the truth and nothing else but the truth.

What is your occupation?” the judge asked Mulla Nasrudin.

“I am the greatest man in the world, your honour!” replied Mulla Nasrudin.

Surprised at hearing this answer, the judge asked Mulla Nasrudin, “Isn’t that a bit too much to say?”

“I know it does not sound modest, your honour,” said Nasrudin, “but I have no choice since I am speaking under oath.”


VIKRAM KARVE

VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune, is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 

Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

FRIENDSHIP


FRIENDSHIP
A Philosophical Approach
By
VIKRAM KARVE

I invest in books. Just like some other investments, where one invests and forgets about it for years, sometimes I buy a book and may not read it for years.

Whenever I buy a book, I always write the date and place of purchase. This morning while I was cleaning my bookcase, I came across a book titled A Source Book in Chinese Philosophy which I had picked up on 26 Jan 2003 at the annual Strand Book Fair at Churchgate Mumbai. I opened a random page and here is the gem of ancient wisdom that I read:

Confucius said: “There are three kinds of Friendship which are Beneficial and three kinds of Friendship which are Harmful.

Friendship with the Upright, with the Truthful, and with the well-informed is beneficial.

Friendship with those who flatter, with those who are meek and who compromise with principles, and with those who talk cleverly is harmful.”

So, dear reader, while selecting who to befriend, bear in mind the above analect of Confucius.  

Well I always believe that it is best to have a philosophical approach to life. So I am going to read this book, and from time to time I will share with you some gems of ancient wisdom with you in my blog.

VIKRAM KARVE

VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune, is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Friday, October 29, 2010

A HEARTY KOLHAPURI MEAL in the Heart of Pune

It is a really hot october afternoon in Pune and I am hungry.

Suddenly I am overwhelmed with mouthwatering memories of a delicious Kolhapuri Lunch I had relished more than four years ago on a similar hot and hungry afternoon in Pune.

Here is a excerpt from my Sulekha Blogprint Series Foodie book APPETITE FOR A STROLL

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm
 
Mouthwatering Memories

A Hearty Kolhapuri Meal in the Heart of Pune
by
Vikram Karve
 
 
It’s a hot Sunday afternoon in Pune. I am voraciously hungry and am pining for a fulfilling meal. And what can be better than a wholesome authentic Kolhapuri meal to blissfully satiate my pangs of hunger?

So I proceed to my favourite Kolhapuri restaurant called “Purepur Kolhapur” near Peru Gate, the food district, in the heart of PuneCity.

It’s a Spartan no-nonsense eatery; the only thing conspicuous is the ‘Kolhapur zero-milestone’ outside the entrance which makes it easy to locate.

I saw a similar zero-milestone somewhere in Kothrud the other day and understand that there is a branch of “Purepur Kolhapur” there too - next to Abhishek Hotel near Mehendale Garage.
 
There are just three main items on the menu – Mutton Taat (Thali), Chicken Taat (which cost Rs. 75/- each), and Purepur Special Taat for a princely Rs. 120/- .I am told that the ‘Purepur Special’ contains everything the place has to offer! (These were the prices around four years ago when I visited the place, maybe changed now)
 
There is a flurry of activity and a large stainless steel taat is placed in front of me almost instantly. 
The Purepur Special Thali comprises the following:
·                     A large bowl of thick chicken curry with four generous pieces of chicken.
·                     A plate of appetizingly crisp dark brown pieces of fried mutton liberally garnished with almost burnt deep fried onion strips.
·                     A Mutton Kheema Vati (Katori)
·                     A vati of Tambda Rassa ( Red Gravy)
·                     A vati of Pandhara Rassa (White Gravy)
·                     Kuchumber salad made of onions, ginger, coriander, green chillies and curds
·                     Lemon pieces
·                     A fresh piping hot chapatti (You can have bhakri if you want, but today I’m in a mood for a crisp hot crunchy chapatti splattered with pure ghee)
·                     A bowl of jeera rice garnished with crisp brown fried onion strips and cashew nuts.
 
I sip the pandhara rassa – it’s invigorating.

Next I spoon into my eager mouth a generous portion of mutton fry.

It’s not melt-in-the-mouth stuff (I think it is the inimitable Bolai mutton).

I chew slowly and savor the sweetish taste of the fried onions blended with the lively spiciness of the crisply fried mutton.

I dip a piece of the piping hot chapatti into the tambda rassa allowing it to soak in, place it on my tongue and chew it to a pulp until it practically swallows itself savouring the flavour till the very end.

Exquisite!
 
Now using my right thumb and two fingers, I lovingly pick up a small piece of chicken from the gravy; delicately place it on my tongue and roll it against my palate.

I close my eyes, look inside, and focus on the succulent boneless chicken release it’s zesty juices and disintegrate.

Yes, unlike the crispy fried mutton which need a vigorous chew to truly relish its deliciousness, the chicken is soft and tender, almost melt-in-the-mouth.

I sample the Kheema Vati – it’s totally different from the Kheema I’ve tasted at Irani and Mughlai eateries. The Kheema has an unusual taste I can’t exactly describe – a bit sweet and sour– a counterbalancing contrast, perhaps.
 
Now that I’ve sampled everything in it’s pristine form, I squeeze a bit of lemon on the mutton and chicken and embellish it with kuchumber to give it the right tang, and from time to time I sip the wholesome pandhara rassa.

I thoroughly enjoy the confluence of contrasting tastes. In conclusion I mix everything with the rice and rejoice the riot of zesty flavours.

At the end, as I always do after all hearty spicy meals, I pick up a wedge of lemon and squeeze a bit of lemon juice into my glass of water and sip it down.

Believe me, it improves the aftertaste and lightens the post-meal heaviness sometimes caused by spicy Indian cuisine.
 
It's an exciting, invigorating meal which perks me up and the sheer epicurean pleasure I experience makes up for the crowded, hassled ambience and indifferent service.

Purepur Kolhapur is worth a visit for the quality and authenticity of its food.
 
For most of us “Kolhapuri” food has become synonymous with the “chilli-hot” self-styled, purported, ostensible Kolhapuri fare served in both highfalutin and run-of-the-mill restaurants whose menus often feature dishes called “Chicken Kolhapuri” or “Vegetable Kolhapuri” which masquerade as Kolhapuri cuisine. Kolhapuri cuisine is “spicy”, not “chilli-hot”, not “rich” and “fatty” – nothing exotic about it. 

A Kolhapuri meal, unique in its simplicity, comprises a variety of lip-smacking, earthy, flavorsome, nourishing dishes and is so complete that it creates within you a inimitable hearty wholesome sense of fulfillment, and is a welcome change from the ubiquitous fatty and greasy-rich Makhanwalla, Masala, Kadhai, Handi, Naan, Biryani Punjabi / Mughlai fare you eat day in and day out. 

There is a world of a difference between pseudo- Kolhapuri and authentic-Kolhapuri food.
 
I do not know where you get genuine Kolhapuri cuisine in Mumbai, Delhi or any of the Metros.

When we visit Kolhapur, we eat at Opal.

I walked all over South Mumbai, experimented, tasted, sampled, but there was no joy. No Kolhapuri Taat anywhere, and even a la carte, nowhere was Mutton or Chicken Kolhapuri the signature dish – it appeared they had put it on the menu just for the sake of it, maybe to gratify the dulled taste buds on the alcohol soaked tongues of inebriated patrons who after imbibing a few drinks were probably in no state to appreciate the finer aspects of relishing good food. 

When queried, the waiters invariably said that Kolhapuri was synonymous with fiery chilli-hot food.
 
I was disappointed to find not even a single authentic Kolhapuri restaurant listed in various Good Food Guides to Mumbai.

If you, dear fellow Foodie, know of an authentic Kolhapuri restaurant in your town or city, will you be so good as to let us all know?
 

If you want to learn of such yummy places in Mumbai and Pune and read about some really mouthwatering foodie adventures and lip-smacking recipes why don't you get a copy of APPETITE FOR A STROLL ...?
 
Just click the links below:



There is no love greater than the love of food.
Happy Eating
Vikram Karve
VIKRAM KARVE 
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2010
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

http://books.sulekha.com/book/appetite-for-a-stroll/default.htm

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

HOW TO ENJOY YOUR MARRIAGE

THE HAPPINESS LIST
HOW TO ENJOY YOUR MARRIAGE
By
VIKRAM KARVE

 
Do you want to save your marriage…?

Then do as I say.

First, get hold of pen and paper.

Now, on the piece of paper write down and make a list of things you like about your life. 
 
Close your eyes, think, introspect, and contemplate about those things that you enjoy and make you happy. 
 
Think of all aspects of your life – love, work, play, family, friends, entertainment, recreation, material possessions…

This list can include activities you enjoy doing, joyful experiences, pleasant reminiscences…anything that produces happiness and a sense of satisfaction.

Now, ask your darling better half, your spouse, to do the same and make a “happiness” list.

Then sit together and compare your “happiness” lists and mark the common items, especially those activities which you can do daily or fairly regularly.

Now start doing these “happiness” activities together and confirm whether they actually enhance your happiness or not.

Maybe you have included some activities which you assumed would make you happy together but actually turned out to be unrewarding or stressful. 
 
Eliminate these unrewarding and stressful activities from your “happiness” list.

Now make sure you do together the maximum possible “happiness” activities as frequently as possible, even daily if feasible.

Your married life will change for the better as your lifestyle incorporates a multitude of pleasant, happy and satisfying activities and happenings. 
 
With only limited hours in a day, the enjoyable events and “happy” activities will crowd out the mutually discordant, unpleasant, disagreeable and incompatible aspects, and your marital life will start resonating with harmony.

You will start experiencing the “much married” feeling, especially when you, your spouse and you, do things together, things which you both enjoy doing the most.

Now, Dear Reader, tell me what is it that you enjoy doing most with your spouse…?

Apart from the obvious, it can be so many things – like watching a movie together, eating out together, going out for a drive together, cuddling up and watching TV together….any one of the so called “Quality Time” activities – spending Quality Time together.

Yes, togetherness is the essence of married life.

Now let me tell you what we, my wife and I, enjoy most doing together.

Well, believe it or not, we enjoy giving a nice vigorous bath to our pet Doberman Hound girl Sherry – that’s what we do on most Sunday mornings – together, husband and wife, we bathe our pet dog – and if the kids are around they join in too.

Dear Reader, do try this out and let me know whether it improves your relationship – I look forward to your feedback.

I too will share my experiences with you.

VIKRAM KARVE 
 
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2010
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 
 
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
Academic Journal Vikram Karve – http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile of Vikram Karve - http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve 
Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Soft Aspects of Information Technology - COGNITIVE BIASES


Soft Aspects of Information Technology
Cognitive Biases
By
VIKRAM KARVE
 

The term cognition refers to a faculty for the processing of information. It is the process of perceiving, thinking, reasoning, analyzing and remembering.

Information is the value or quality of a message or communication between a sender and a receiver. Data is observation of facts and information is a collection of data from which conclusions may be drawn, decisions taken and knowledge acquired.
       
Understanding Human Behaviour is sine qua non for the successful design and implementation of Soft Systems (Human Activity Systems), Management Information Systems and, indeed, all Information Processing Systems.

Human behaviour plays an important role in human information processing.

It must be remembered that Information Systems are not installed in a vacuum; they are implanted into a living body, an organisation, a Human Activity Systems.

Human beings are being continuously exposed to an enormous number of stimuli. Cognition of all the stimuli is not possible and most stimuli are eliminated by a complex cognitive process. Even those perceived may be subject to cognitive biases.

A better understanding of human information processing enhances the usefulness of information technology and systems.


COGNITIVE BIASES


Here are a few salient cognitive biases which affect information formulation, acquisition, analysis and interpretation:

Adjustment and Anchoring – In situations of information overload there is a tendency to resort to the anchoring and adjustment heuristic and to rely too heavily, or “anchor” on a past reference or on one trait or piece of information when making decisions. For example, you may emphasize too much on the first piece of information you encounter.

Selective Perception – You accept / absorb only that information that is in consonance with, or confirms, your views, beliefs and values.

Wishful Thinking – You interpret information according to what might be pleasing to imagine (as you would like things to be) rather than according to actual evidence or rational logical reality.

Self-fulfilling Prophecy – is the tendency to engage in behaviors that elicit results which will (consciously or not) confirm our beliefs. You seek, acquire and analyze only that information that confirms or lends credibility to your views and values and ignore any information that contradicts your views or values. This is a “Confirmation bias” exemplified by an irrational tendency to search for, interpret or remember information in a way that confirms your preconceptions.

Ease of Recall – Information which can easily be recalled or accessed affects your perception of the likelihood of similar events occurring again. You rely too much on information that is easy to recall from memory.

Conservation – You reach premature conclusions on the basis of too small a sample of information.

Order Effects – The order in which information is presented to you affects information retention in your memory. Typically, the first piece of information presented (primacy effect) and the last piece of information presented (recency effect) assume undue importance in your mind.

Overconfidence – The greater the amount of data the more confident you are about the accuracy of the data.

Availability – you only rely on and use easily available information and ignore significant information that may not be so easily sourced.

Bandwagon Effect – you develop a tendency to believe information because many other people believe the same information. This may be a manifestation of Groupthink and you tend to “jump on the bandwagon”.

Hindsight – you are unable to think objectively if you receive information that a certain outcome has occurred and then told to ignore this information. With hindsight, outcomes that have occurred seem to have been inevitable; sometimes this is called the “I-knew-it-all-along” effect, the inclination to see past events as being predictable. You see relationships more easily in hindsight than in foresight.

Habit – You choose some information because it was previously accepted for a perceived similar purpose (precedence syndrome) or because of superstition.

Illusion of Control – You develop a tendency for to believe you can control or at least influence outcomes that you clearly cannot and hence you will seek, interpret, process and use information accordingly in an irrational manner.

Gambler’s Fallacy – You falsely assume that an unexpected occurrence of a “run” of some events enhances the probability of occurrence of an event that has not occurred. You develop a tendency to think that future probabilities are altered by past events (when in reality it is not so) and process information accordingly.

Déformation professionnelle – you tend to process information according to the conventions of your own profession, forgetting any broader point of view. You fall victim to the Law of the Hammer – “When the only tool you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail” – this may happen owing to overspecialization or too straitjacketed professional training which hampers a liberal broad perspective.

(To be continued…)

VIKRAM KARVE 
 
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2010
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this book review.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
VIKRAM KARVE educated at IIT Delhi, ITBHU, Lawrence School Lovedale, and Bishop's School Pune,  is an Electronics and Communications Engineer by profession, a Human Resource Manager and Trainer by occupation, a Teacher by vocation, a Creative Writer by inclination and a Foodie by passion. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles in magazines and journals for many years before the advent of blogging. His delicious foodie blogs have been compiled in a book "Appetite for a Stroll". Vikram lives in Pune with his family and pet Doberman girl Sherry, with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts. 
 
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog - http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
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Email: vikramkarve@sify.com
Foodie Book:  Appetite for a Stroll  

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