THE MATCHMAKERS – A Story

STORY OF THE MATCHMAKERS 

Whenever I see “Matchmakers” or “Matrimonial Sites” or “Marriage Bureaus” – I remember this story.

MARRIAGE BUREAU

A Story

By

VIKRAM KARVE

 

Visit to the Marriage Bureau

36 years ago – in the year 1980 – I went to a “Marriage Bureau” in Pune.

All my attempts at finding a suitable bride through the “love” route had failed – and I decided to go in for an “arranged marriage”.

The Proprietors of the Marriage Bureau were a “made-for-each-other-couple” – who seemed to be in their early 40’s.

The man and the woman sat side by side in the same office as true partners.

They seemed to be a most compatible couple – and the harmony which was visible in their demeanour indicated that they were true “soulmates”.

Seeing this “ideal couple” at the helm of affairs inspired confidence in me.

I knew that I had come to the right place – only a truly happily married couple whose relationship was rocking would know the “compatibility aspects” required for a happy marriage – and they would surely find the right bride for me.

Both of them asked me a number of questions – regarding myself – and also – about my “expectations” as far as the bride was concerned.

Within a week – they had lined up 3 girls for me to “see”.

I liked the very first girl I “saw” – and we both said “yes” to each other.

For the sake of courtesy – I “saw” the other 2 girls too – and I liked both of them – but then – legally – I could have only one wife – so – I got married to the first girl to whom I had said “yes”.

The fact the all the 3 girls the ‘Marriage Bureau’ had suggested were “perfect match” for me was “proof of the pudding” that the ‘made-for-each-other couple’ who ran the ‘marriage bureau’ knew what marriage was all about.

36 Years Later

01 January 2016 

Meeting the “Matchmakers”

It was a grand event – in the best 5 Star Hotel in town – to celebrate the Golden Jubilee (50^th Anniversary) of the ‘Marriage Bureau’.

Yes – the ‘Marriage Bureau’ had been started 50 years ago – was still going strong – in fact – they now had a global presence – and operated online through their website – and – today – they had launched their ‘Mobile Matrimonial App’ too.

It was a huge event – and the crowd must have been at least a thousand strong – maybe even 2000 – and – it seemed that most of the couples whose marriages had been “arranged” by this “marriage bureau” had made it a point to attend.

They had even tracked us down to our present address in New York – and since we were in India for our annual Christmas Vacations – we – my wife and I – made it a point to attend the function.

The proprietors of the ‘marriage bureau’ – who – most probably – were now in their late 70’s – still looked a very “made-for-each-other couple”.

Both of them were in perfect harmony with each other – like “soulmates” – a “perfect” couple – and they acted like perfect hosts.

Dressed in matching colour-coordinated clothes, the two of them stood together at the entrance to welcome us – and – later – after they had cut the magnificent anniversary cake together – both of them moved around to personally greet us and ensure that our glasses were topped up, our plates were full and we were being well looked after.

During the party – many couples expressed their gratitude to the “made-for-each-other couple” proprietors of the ‘marriage bureau’ – and – I too made it a point to meet them and thank them for finding me a most suitable bride.

After the event – we – my wife and I – walked to the foyer of the hotel – and I asked the concierge to get me a taxi to Aundh – when – a male voice suddenly said from behind: “Why Taxi…? I am going towards Aundh – I will drop you in my car…”

I turned around – it was the ‘proprietor’ of the ‘Marriage Bureau’ – our host.

Soon – his chauffeur driven limousine arrived.

“You two sit on the rear seat – I will sit in front with the driver…” he said.

“Sir – but what about ‘madam’…? Isn’t she coming…?” I said.

“…‘Madam’…? Which ‘madam’…?” he asked.

“Sir – your wife…?” I said.

“My ‘wife’…? Well – I don’t have a wife – I am a bachelor…” he said.

I was stunned.

Seeing my bewilderment – he said: 

“Don’t feel embarrassed – it happens quite often – many people think that my ‘business partner’ is also my ‘life partner’ – but – we are quite clear about it – you must never mix ‘business’ with ‘matrimony’ – ‘business’ is ‘business’ – and – ‘matrimony’ is ‘matrimony’ …”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

 

This is a re-post of my story MARRIAGE BUREAU posted by me Vikram Karve online earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/01/marriage-bureau.html

MARRIAGE COMPATIBILITY - HOW TO FIND YOUR PERFECT SOULMATE

MATRIMONIAL COMPATIBILITY
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR YOUR PERFECT “SOULMATE”
Ancient Wisdom Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE


Are you planning to get married?

Are you looking for a soulmate?

Are you searching for the perfect wife or husband?

Yes?

Then I think you must read this apocryphal Mulla Nasrudin Story titled THE PERFECT WIFE


THE PERFECT WIFE - an apocryphal story retold by Vikram Karve

Mulla Nasrudin was sitting in a tea shop – when a friend came excitedly to speak with him.

“I am about to get married,” his friend said, “and I am so very excited.”

“Congratulations,” Mulla Nasrudin said, nonchalant, glum, poker-faced.

“Tell me, Nasrudin – have you ever thought of marriage yourself?” the about to get married friend asked Mulla Nasrudin who had remained a chronic bachelor. 

Yes – Mulla Nasrudin was still a bachelor despite his advancing years.

Nasrudin replied, “Of course I did think of getting married. In fact – I very much wanted to get married.”

“So, what happened...? Why did you not get married...?” the friend asked curious.

“I wanted to find for myself the perfect wife,” Nasrudin said, “so I travelled all over the world searching for the perfect wife. I first went to Damascus. There I met a beautiful woman who was gracious, kind, and deeply spiritual – but she had no worldly knowledge.”

“Oh, how sad...!” said the friend, “then what did you do...?”

"Then I travelled further and went to Isfahan. There I met a woman who was both spiritual and worldly, beautiful in many ways – but her social graces were not of the highest standards.”

“What a tragedy? Then what did you do? You gave up on marriage?” the friend asked.

“No – No – I don’t give up so easily – and I very much wanted to get married – so I kept on searching for the perfect wife – and I travelled all over the world meeting so many women – yes – for many years – I kept on searching and searching for the perfect wife,” Nasrudin said.

“And did you find her? Tell me – did you finally find the perfect wife...?” the friend asked eagerly.

“Yes,” Nasrudin said, “after travelling all over finally I went to Cairo – and there after much searching I found her – the perfect woman for me. She was exactly what I wanted – she was spiritually profound – intellectually accomplished – extremely graceful – and she was truly beautiful in every respect – at home in the world – and at home in the realms beyond it – I knew I had found the perfect wife.”

“Then why did you not marry her?” the friend asked excitedly.

“Alas,” said Nasrudin as he shook his head in dismay, “Unfortunately – she was searching for the perfect husband.”

MORAL OF THE STORY

Nowadays, in the context of marriage – a big deal is made about marital compatibility and things like finding the right soul-mate etc. 

It is because of such ideas that some individuals who want to get married just cannot make up their minds. 

For example – there is this beautiful and bright young “Techie” girl. 

She wants to get married – but it seems that she just cannot seem to a suitable boy who satisfies her “stringent” requirements. 

In case she prefers a “love” marriage – she is surrounded by so many “eligible” boys – she has so many nice male colleagues at work – and so many boys in her friends circle.

Yes – she has so many good boys to choose from – to fall in love with – and to get married. 

In case she wants to go in for an “arranged” marriage – her parents and well-wishers have already lined up so many eligible boys for her. 

In fact – she has already “seen” and “rejected” a large number of boys – much to the disappointment and embarrassment of her parents. 

None of the boys seems to come up to her perfect standards and high expectations.

But one thing is sure – she does want to get married.

Maybe she needs to read this apocryphal Mulla Nasrudin Teaching story: “THE PERFECT WIFE”

A HIGHER MORAL OF THE STORY

Though this story applies to matrimony – let us look at the story from a higher plane.

Please close your eyes and introspect. 

Though this story is about marriage (finding the perfect wife) – it applies to everyone who is obsessed with “perfection” in any aspect of life – the so-called “perfectionists”.

Do apply the story to yourself, to others, to situations you have observed yourself and others who strive for achieving “perfection” to the point of obsession. 

They not only want things to be perfect – they also want people to be “perfect”.

And as far as Matrimonial Search is concerned – if you are young and you are searching for a “perfect” soulmate as your spouse – do remember this story of Mulla Nasrudin and his never ending search for a perfect wife until it was too late.

Otherwise you will keep searching for your perfect soulmate all your life – until it is too late – and maybe you will remain single all your life – as there will be no one left for you to marry.

“IMPERFECT” MARRIAGE CAN BE A DURABLE MARRIAGE

Let me end on a personal note.

I married the first girl I saw (as a part of the arranged matrimony system). 

She is certainly not a “perfect” wife – in fact she did not even not know how to cook and she was clueless in most matters.

By the way – I am no “perfect” husband either.

In fact – we are most incompatible.

However –  the “imperfect” marriage (of the “imperfect” wife and the “imperfect” husband) is still going strong for 33 years now.

So stop wasting your time searching for the elusive “perfect” soulmate – and get on with whoever is available – and let things work out – unless, of course – you want to remain a “happy” unmarried bachelor all your life.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a spoof, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This article written be me in the year 2000 and Posted Online by me earlier in 2004 in my Creative Writing Blog at url: http://creative.sulekha.com/teaching-stories-part-2-by-vikram-karve_30913_blog

MATRIMONIAL STRATEGY FOR WOMEN – aka HOW TO FIND A SUITABLE HUSBAND – Part 1

MATRIMONIAL STRATEGY FOR WOMEN – PART 1

How to Find a Suitable Husband

Musings on Career Women and Marriage Prospects

By

VIKRAM KARVE

PART 1

THE SMART YOUNG WOMAN

This happened more than 30 years ago, when I was a “Babu” in uniform, pushing files in Delhi.

A smart young woman, maybe 20 or 21, entered my office.

The young woman said that she had been asked to report to me.

“Me?” I asked.

I looked at her appreciatively, since she was very beautiful.

She smiled coyly at the undisguised admiration in my eyes.

Then, demurely, she said, “Sir, you are the administrative officer…?”

“Yes,” I said.

“Sir, I am a new recruit LDC. I have got orders to join this office. I have come for the reporting interview.”

“Oh, please sit down,” I said.

She sat down and handed a folder to me.

The folder had her appointment letter and various certificates – educational, sports, dramatics.

I saw that she was a very intelligent, well qualified and talented girl. 

She had done her schooling in a KV and her graduation from a prestigious college. 

She seemed overqualified and over-talented for this job of a LDC (Lower Division Clerk.

I looked at the young woman and said: “You have done so well in your graduation – you have a first class with distinction – and you have so many talents and you have excelled in so many extra-curricular activities. You should study further. Or you should try to become an officer somewhere. Why don’t you give the civil services or banking exam or try for some Class 1 Officer’s post? Why do want to do this clerical job?”

“To improve my marriage prospects,” she said, matter-of-factly.

When I heard this incredulous answer, I was struck dumb.

I looked at her in silence, not knowing what to say.

“Sir, please don’t get angry – I am not joking. It is the truth. This is the real reason that I am taking up this clerical job – to improve my marriage prospects,” she said.

“Can you please explain to me how doing this LDC job is going to help your marriage prospects?” I asked, curious.

“Yes, Sir. I will explain to you. Sir, I am the fourth daughter from a lower middle class family. My father works here in the secretarial service. He joined as an LDC and is a Section Officer now. He is retiring next year. He wants to get me married before he retires. He wants to finish off all his responsibilities before he goes back to his village to settle down there,” she said.

“So?”

“This is a non-transferable job, Sir, and I will remain in Delhi throughout my life. It will be easy for them to find a suitable boy in the same service – some LDC or maybe an UDC. Both of us will be working in offices here in the secretariat only. We will never be transferred out of Delhi. And we will get quarters in Delhi where we can stay for our entire careers. It is all so convenient.”

“Come on,” I said, “You will easily get an Officer husband.”

She blushed at the disguised compliment and said, “I know Sir. But we can’t afford the dowry for a high status match. It is best for us to remain within our class. Here, everyone wants a girl with a secure, easy and non-transferable “9 to 5” five day week government job like this one. Besides, if I get someone from the same service, he will be elder than me and also senior to me, so he will get more pay than me and there will be no ego problems.”

I looked at her. 

I had never seen so much candidness before.

I smiled at her and said, “I really appreciate your talking to me so honestly. Welcome to the office. I am sure you will do well.”

Six months later she came to give me the good news.

Her marriage was fixed to a UDC working the neighbouring office.

In fact, it was a love marriage – love cum arranged – she had liked the boy and she told her parents and they had fixed the match.

Soon she would be married and her father would retire peacefully, all his familial duties done.

Then she and her UDC husband would get a government quarter nearby where they would probably live for the next 40 years, till they both retired, hopefully as Section Officers.

They could look forward to a blissful married life, commuting up and down to office together, and have a stress-free unexciting secure working life, getting slow and steady time bound promotions, and enjoying all the benefits that come with a government job.

Years passed, I got transferred all over, did so many appointments, met so many people, and this story went into a remote recess of my memory.

Then, almost 30 years later, another interesting incident happened, and suddenly I remembered this story.

I will tell you all about that hilarious incident in my next Blog Post.

Till then, tell me what you think of this story – especially if you are a woman – “Do Women take up a Job to improve their Marriage Prospects?”

(to be continued in Part 2...)

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a spoof, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

     

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

 

This is Part 1 of the story written by me and posted by me on my blog on 08 July 2013 titled LOOKING FOR A HUSBAND Musings on Career Women and Marriage Prospects which featured Two Stories - THE SMART YOUNG WOMAN and THE LADY ARMY OFFICER at url:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/07/looking-for-husband-career-women-and.html