NRI = Non Resident Indian or Never Returning Indian...?

Some Non Resident Indians (NRIs) – who migrated abroad for a “better life” – they complain that life abroad is tougher than life in India. 

Sometimes – one meets NRIs with a “guilty conscience” – who say that they feel “homesick” about India.  

Whenever I see such fake expression of homesickness and hypocrisy by people who have migrated abroad for “greener pastures” or for a “better life” – I remember this story I had written a few years ago...  

Disclaimer 

NB: In this Story – for ease of understanding – the generic term NRI (Non Resident Indian) includes PIO (Person of Indian Origin) and OCI (Overseas Citizen of India) as well.

THE NON RESIDENT INDIAN (NRI) WITH A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

A Conversation 

Short Fiction

By

VIKRAM KARVE 

(This Story happened a few years ago)

A few days ago I met an NRI.

You know what NRI means – don’t you...?

Of course you do – NRI means NON RESIDENT INDIAN.

Of course – there is a “RESIDENT INDIAN” Friend of mine – who jokingly says – that NRI means: “NEVER TO RETURN TO INDIA”. 

In a nutshell – my Resident Indian Friend defines NRI as:

NRI = Never Returning Indian

What my Resident Indian friend says has a ring of truth about it – none of my classmates who went abroad (mostly to the USA) for higher studies returned home to India. 

They all settled down in America. 

I think almost all of them are American Citizens now. 

They have relinquished Indian Citizenship and taken up citizenship of their chosen land. 

They consciously and willingly pledge allegiance to their chosen country and not India – it may be apt to call them American Persons of Indian Origin (PIO) – rather than NRI. 

Such Foreigners of Indian Origin are called by various names like “Indian-American”/“Kiwi-Indian”/“British-Indian” etc

I met one such PIO the other day. 

I was surprised that – despite enjoying the fruits of living abroad (in the land of opportunity and prosperity) for more than 30 years – he still seemed to have a guilty conscience about leaving India – and “abandoning” his parents and loved ones – leaving them behind to fend for themselves. 

I got fed up hearing him fake his love for India and trying to show how much he missed India by faking a guilty conscience.

So – I asked him a simple question: 

“Why don’t you come back...?”

He gave me all sorts of excuses which were far from convincing. 

To put matters in the right perspective – I told him the following:

“... 1. No one forced you to go abroad 

You were not like indentured labour sent by the British from India to other colonies when thousands of Indians were transported to various colonies of European powers to provide labour for the sugar plantations. 

You migrated to the USA by your own free will. 

Like so many others you went to the land of opportunity – USA – to realize your “American Dream”.

2. In fact – when we were studying engineering in the 1970’s – it was you – who was so desperate to go to America – for higher studies – with the ultimate aim of settling down there permanently.

You were running from pillar to post to get admission to a good university in the USA and arranging finances (scholarship and loan) – despite the fact that you were getting a good job in India in campus placement.

Even if you wanted to study more and do your postgraduation (MS/ME/M.Tech) – you could have easily got admission to the best of IIT’s in India. 

On the other hand – persons like me stayed back in India – despite having an excellent opportunity to go abroad to America – you know that.

3. Obviously – you felt that America is a better place than India to live in. 

Otherwise – you wouldn’t have gone through all the trouble of migrating in the first place. 

If you had really wanted to – you could have come back to India on completion of your studies. 

With your qualifications – I am sure you would have got a good job here in India. 

But – you continued staying there in the US. 

You relinquished Indian Citizenship – and – you acquired American Citizenship.

4. Till now you have prospered in your adopted country and enjoyed the fruits of living in America. 

The main reason you left India and migrated for “greener” pastures abroad was to have a “better” life – since you felt that you could achieve that “better” life by migrating abroad – rather than staying back in India. 

You have achieved your life’s aim. 

So – in hindsight – what are you feeling guilty about...?

5. There is no need to have a guilty conscience about leaving India (and your near and dear one’s) for a better life abroad. 

Forget about us and those who you have left behind in India.

Stop feeling guilty and enjoy the “better life” out there (the very reason for which you migrated).

6. And – if you truly love India so much – then –  just pack your bags and come back forever. 

But – remember one thing. 

Come back – because you really love India 

Come back to India – only if you honestly want to come back and serve your motherland

Don’t come back for some selfish reasons of your own (materialistic, economic, career ambition, “greener pastures” etc) ...”

My NRI friend smiled like a Cheshire Cat. 

I knew he was never going to come back to India. 

He was just faking “homesickness”.

He was just trying to put on a false pretence of “guilty conscience” for our consumption. 

Dear Reader: 

Have you seen such hypocrite NRIs (Never Returning Indians)...?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

This is a revised repost of my article posted online a number of times earlier at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/01/nri-with-guilty-conscience.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/08/fake-homesickness-nri-with-guilty.html and https://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/12/foreign-indian-versus-resident-indian.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/11/nri-never-returning-indian.html etc

NRI = Never Returning Indian

Whenever NRIs who have migrated abroad complain that life abroad is tougher than in India – or – whenever I meet an NRI with a “guilty conscience” who says he feels homesick about India – I remember this article I had written a few years ago.

FAKE HOMESICKNESS

The NON RESIDENT INDIAN (NRI) WITH A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

A Conversation

By

VIKRAM KARVE

A few days ago I met an NRI.

You know what NRI means – don’t you...?

Of course you do – NRI means NON RESIDENT INDIAN.

Of course – there is a “RESIDENT INDIAN” Friend of mine – who jokingly says – that NRI means: “NEVER TO RETURN TO INDIA”. 

In a nutshell – my Resident Indian Friend defines NRI as:

NRI = Never Returning Indian

What my Resident Indian friend says has a ring of truth about it – none of my classmates who went abroad (mostly to the USA) for higher studies returned home to India. 

They all settled down in America. 

I think almost all of them are American Citizens now. 

So since they have relinquished Indian Citizenship and taken up citizenship of their chosen land – and now they consciously and willingly pledge allegiance to their chosen country and not India – it may be apt to call them American Persons of Indian Origin (PIO) rather than NRI.

I met one such PIO the other day. 

I was surprised that after enjoying the fruits of living abroad (in the land of opportunity and prosperity) for more than 30 years – he still seemed to have a guilty conscience about leaving India (and “abandoning” his parents and loved ones – leaving them behind to fend for themselves).

I asked him a simple question: “Why don’t you come back...?”

He gave me all sorts of excuses which were far from convincing (in his heart I think even he knew it).

To cheer him up – I told him the following:

1. No one forced you to go abroad (like the indentured labour sent by the British from India to other colonies when thousands of Indians were transported to various colonies of European powers to provide labour for the sugar plantations). 

You migrated to the USA by your own free will. 

Like so many others you went to the land of opportunity – USA – to realize your “American Dream”.

2. In fact – when we were studying engineering in the 1970s – it was you who was desperate to go to America for higher studies – and you were running from pillar to post to get admission to a good university in the USA and arranging finances (scholarship and loan) despite the fact that you were getting a good job in India in campus placement.

Even if you wanted to study more and do your postgraduation – you could have easily got admission to the best of IITs in India. 

On the other hand – persons like me stayed back in India – despite having an excellent opportunity to go abroad to America – you know that.

3. Obviously – you felt that America is a better place than India to live in. 

Otherwise – you wouldn’t have gone through all the trouble of migrating in the first place. 

If you had really wanted to – you could have come back to India on completion of your studies. 

With your qualifications – I am sure you would have got a good job here in India. 

But – you continued staying there – you relinquished Indian Citizenship – and – you acquired American Citizenship.

4. Till now you have prospered in your adopted country and enjoyed the fruits of living in America. 

The main reason you left India and migrated for “greener” pastures abroad was to have a “better” life since you felt that you could achieve that “better” life by migrating abroad rather than staying back in India. You have achieved your life’s aim. 

So – in hindsight – what are you feeling guilty about?

5. There is no need to have a guilty conscience about leaving India (and your near and dear one’s) for a better life abroad. 

Forget about us. 

Stop feeling guilty and enjoy the “better life” out there (the very reason for which you migrated).

6. And – if you truly love India so much – then –  just pack your bags and come back forever. 

But – remember one thing. 

Come back because you really love India and only if you honestly want to come back and serve your motherland. 

Do not come back for some selfish reasons of your own (materialistic, economic, career ambition, “greener pastures” etc) 

My NRI friend smiled like a Cheshire Cat. 

I knew he was never going to come back. 

He was just faking homesickness.

He was just trying to put on a false pretence of guilty conscience for our consumption. 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

This is a revised repost of my article posted online a number of times earlier at urls: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/01/nri-with-guilty-conscience.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/08/fake-homesickness-nri-with-guilty.html and https://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/12/foreign-indian-versus-resident-indian.html etc

NRI CHILDREN – ASSET or LIABILITY?

NRI CHILDREN – ASSET or LIABILITY?

Short Fiction – An Apocryphal Story

By

VIKRAM KARVE

My peer group comprises my classmates from school and college, my ex-navy and ex “fauji” military veteran buddies, and my friends, all in their late 50’s or early 60’s.

Whenever we meet, I realize that one notable fact pertaining to my peer group is that almost everyone has NRI children.

[I use the term NRI (Non Resident Indian) quite generically for all Persons of Indian Origin (PIO) settled abroad, including those who have adopted citizenships of their host countries]

At one such gathering, I met a friend – my school classmate.

She was an “NRI Mother” – or to put it correctly – she was the “mother of an NRI daughter”.

Her only child, a 27 year old married daughter, had settled down abroad in America with her husband.

“Nice to see you after a long time,” I said to my friend.

“Yes – I was abroad for almost one year – in the US,” she said.

“America? Wow!” I said.

“Last year, my daughter got pregnant – so she called me to America to look after her during her pregnancy days – and then, after her delivery, she wanted me to stay and look after the baby – so I stayed on there in the US for almost 6 months,” she said.

“Isn’t it our tradition that daughters come home, to their mother’s place, for their first delivery? Your daughter could have come here to Pune for her delivery,” I said.

“Are you crazy or something?” she asked.

“Why?”

“My daughter wanted her child to get US citizenship by birth. If the baby is born here in India, how will the baby get American citizenship?”

“Oh!” I said, “So you stayed there in America for 6 months after her delivery, did all the baby care, and then came back,” I said.

“Yes – but my daughter called me again for child-care “nanny” duties, till her baby was old enough for day-care, since she wanted to get back to work – it was important for her career that she started working as quickly as possible,” she said.

“So you went to America again?”

“Yes – for 6 months – till the baby was almost one year old,” she said.

“Oh – but now it is finally all over – and you’ll be staying here in Pune now…” I said.

“No – I am going again…” she said.

“You are going again to America…? Why…?”

“My daughter’s job is very hectic – so she wants me to do “nanny” duties and look after her child.”

“But your daughter’s child must be around one year old now – can’t the child be kept in a day-care centre?”

“I don’t know,” my friend said, “but my daughter insisted that I come because she wants her child to be looked after properly by me – so that the child imbibes our culture.”

“Culture…?” I said, astonished – and as I recovered my wits – I noticed that an old lady had walked over and joined us.

I knew the old lady – she was my friend’s mother.

I knew the old lady’s husband (my friend’s father) too.

My friend – their daughter – was their only child.

The old couple lived in a beautiful bungalow in the Lonavala – a picturesque hill station near Pune – and I had once visited them over there a few years ago.

I did not see the old lady’s husband around, so I asked the old lady, “How is uncle?”

“You don’t know…?” the old lady asked me.

“What…?”

“My husband died 3 months ago…” the old lady said.

“Oh – I am very sorry…”

“It’s okay – he was 84 years old – but he was absolutely fit till the last day. Though I miss him very much, one consolation is that he died when he was fit and healthy…” she said.

I did not say anything.

The old lady looked at me, and she said to me, “And by the way – I have shifted to an old age home…”

“Old Age Home…?” I asked, shocked.

“What to do…? I cannot live in that huge secluded bungalow all alone…” the old lady said.

“But why go to an old age home…? Why don’t you live with your daughter in Pune…?” I asked.

“Of course I would like to live with my daughter,” the old lady said, “given a choice, I certainly would not like to live in an old age home – but do I have a choice…?”

I did not say anything – I just kept looking at the old lady, not knowing what to say.

Seeing the confused look on my face, the old lady said, “Didn’t my daughter tell you? Her daughter, my granddaughter, has called her to America for babysitting and nanny duties – she will be away in America for 6 months – and then she may have to go back to America again and again – for the next delivery – and babysitting and nanny duties for the next child – so who is going to look after me here? I am 80 now – so it is better for me to live in an old age home…”

I looked at my friend, and wondered at her predicament.

On one side stood her recently widowed mother, pleading not to be sent to the old age home.

On the other side stood her daughter, beseeching her to come to America to take care of her baby.

She had a duty to look after her old widowed mother.

But she felt the strong pull of motherhood towards her daughter.

She was torn between her loyalty to her mother and her love for her daughter.

And in her case – her motherly love for the daughter had prevailed over her filial duty towards the mother.

EPILOGUE

Persons of my generation, in their 50’s and 60’s, who are parents of “NRI Children”, are in a Catch-22 situation.

They are expected to look after their parents, who may be in their 70’s and 80’s.

But their “NRI Children” also have “expectations” from them – especially from their mothers – during childbirth for “midwife” duties, and later, for baby care and surrogate parenting “nanny” duties.

That is why I often wonder:

Are “NRI Children” an asset or a liability?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)