Tuesday, April 28, 2020

“Macho Man”


“MACHO MAN”
Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE

PART 1 – THE “CLIENT”

“I want to divorce my wife…” he said.

“Why…?” I asked him.

“Adultery…” he said.

“Oh. Your wife has committed adultery. Is she having an extra-marital affair…?” I asked him.

“No…” he said, “I have committed adultery. I am having extra-marital affairs…”

“Oh…” I said, “So your wife found out about your infidelity – and now – she is asking for divorce on grounds of adultery…”

“No…” he said, “My wife knows nothing about my affairs….”

“Then what is the problem…? You can continue having a “good time”. Why do you want a divorce…? Do you want to marry someone with whom you are having an affair..?” I asked him.

“Please. Don’t ask me too many questions. You are the best divorce lawyer in town. Just get me a quick divorce…” he said.

“Okay. I’ll need some details – about you – your wife – and some other information. I have to go to court now – so – please sit with my assistant and give her whatever details she asks for…” I said to him, “We will study your case and call you for your next appointment…”

“Okay…” he said.

I called my assistant – I briefed her – and – I left my office to go to court for an important divorce case.

PART 2 – “MACHO MAN”

On the way to court – I thought about my latest “client”.

He was my classmate in college.

He was the “prima donna” of our course – handsome, smart and debonair.

His nickname was “Macho Man” – because of his superb physique.

I was not surprised that he was having extra-marital affairs.

A tall, strapping, flamboyant man endowed with an excellent physique – he had been a “Casanova” even when we were in college – 20 years ago.

Girls seemed to be attracted to him – and – he had a way with girls and he knew how to seduce them.

While most of us were shy “virgins” – he seemed to be having a “good time”.

We always listened with awe – as he regaled us with intimate accounts of his passionate lovemaking – and – the exhilarating carnal delights he had experienced.

We felt fascinated when he described the vivid details of his spicy erotic conquests and lascivious sexual exploits in a language that would make a sailor blush.

Yes – “Macho Man” seemed to be a true “Casanova” – a “Don Juan” – a “Romeo” par excellence – and – we all looked up to him with a sense of awe and envious admiration.

After completing our Bachelor’s Degree in Science (B.Sc.) – I studied Law (LL.B.) – and “Macho Man” joined the Navy.

We had not met since college – but now – he had located me via the college alumni network – and – he had landed up in my office – asking me to take up his divorce case.

PART 3 – DIVORCE

One week later – “Macho Man” sat in front of me in my office.

I looked at “Macho Man”.

Then – I said to him: “We did a discreet background check. And – our private investigation revealed some startling information…”

“Startling Information…?” he asked me.

“Your wife is having an extra-marital affair – not you…” I said.

“How did you find out…?” he asked, looking surprised.

“Never mind how we found out. You just tell me if it is true…” I said.

“Yes…” he said, “My wife is having an affair…”

“And you…” I asked him.

“No. I am not having an affair…” he said.

“Then why did you lie to me that you were having an affair…? You told me that you had committed adultery – whereas – it is your wife who is committing adultery…” I said to him.

“Macho Man” looked at me and said: “For a man in my position – it is better to be seen as a “Casanova” than a “Cuckold”…”

“What do you mean…?” I asked him.

“I am a senior officer in command of so many men. I have created a tough “image” due to my formidable appearance and commanding personality. I have a strong reputation that I am a redoubtable officer who can take charge of anything and anyone. Just imagine what will happen if everyone finds out that I am a weak cuckold who is unable to take charge of his own wife…?” he said, “I will lose the respect of my men – and my fellow officers – they would all scoff at me and make fun of me…”

“So – you are “faking” adultery – just for the sake of your image…?” I asked him.

“Yes…” he said, “Isn’t it true that a “Casanova” who has extra-marital sexual conquests is admired and envied by other men. On the other hand – a “Cuckold” whose wife is committing adultery and having extra-marital affairs – he becomes a “laughing stock” and is mocked at with derision. In my position – I would rather be a source of envy than an object of ridicule…”

He had a point.

If a husband has an affair – the deceived wife receives sympathy.

But – if a wife has an extra-marital affair – the cuckolded husband is ridiculed and mocked at – and he becomes a “laughing stock” in society – especially among his fellow men.

“Macho Man” wanted to enjoy the “glory” of being a virile “Stud Bull” rather than suffer the “stigma” of being an impotent “cuckold”.

That’s why he was “boasting” that he was having extra-marital affairs – when he knew that it was his wife who was committing adultery.  

EPILOGUE

I had handled many divorce cases involving adultery.

But in all cases – the clients had accused their partners of committing adultery.

This was the first time that a client wanted divorce on “self-confessed adultery”.

It was easy.

I spoke to Macho Man’s wife and told her everything.

“Let him feel happy…” she said – and she agreed to an amicable divorce.

Meanwhile – as “Macho Man” had desired – rumor was spread that his wife had divorced him because of his sexual conquests – which enhanced his “image” as a “Casanova”.

His wife quietly moved in with her lover – and – they lived happily ever after.

All’s well that ends well. 

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:
1. This is a fictional spoof, satire, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:
No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.
Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

No comments: