Sunday, January 28, 2018

Tête-à-Tête

TÊTE-À-TÊTE
Fiction Short Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE  

“Your relationship with my wife is affecting our married life…” the smart young man said to me.

“What…?” I said, stunned, “Who the hell are you…? I don’t even know who your wife is…”

“Sir – you know my wife…” he said.

“Who…?” I said, perplexed.

“Wait, Sir – I’ll show you…” he said.

He tapped the screen of his smartphone.

Then – he gave me his smartphone and said:

“Please see, Sir – that is her profile…”

I looked at the picture – her face seemed familiar.

“That is “Nisha” – my wife – her name is written below her picture…” the young man said.

“Yes…” I mumbled.

“And – you are her “Friend”…”

“Yes – I can see that. But – let me assure you – I have never met your wife. So – there is no question of my having an “affair” with her…”

“Sir – please – I never accused you of having an “affair” with my wife…”

“Well – you said that I have a “relationship” with your wife…”

“I meant an “intellectual” relationship – not a “physical” relationship…”

“What do you mean by “intellectual relationship” – I have no such…”

“Please, Sir…” he interrupted, “You and my wife are “Friends” on the Social Media…”

“Wait…” I said.

I gave him back his smartphone.

I took out my smartphone from my pocket.

I opened the Social Media App – I searched for “Nisha” – then – I opened Nisha’s Profile Page – and – I browsed through her timeline.

“Oh, yes – she is a reader of my Blogs…”

“She is your “Friend”…”

“Well – I have many online “friends” – and – most of them are women…”

“I can see that – you have a huge female following…”

“What are you implying by saying that…? Let me tell you – I never send “friend” requests to women. And even if women send me “friend” requests – I do “due diligence” before accepting…”

“I know you are a respectable person, Sir. That’s why I have come to you for help…”

“Help…? You want my help…?”

“Yes, Sir…”

“Tell me – what can I do for you…?”

“Sir – please “unfriend” my wife – block her – mute her – I want you to totally breakup your online relationship with her…”

“What are you saying…?”

“Sir – my wife Nisha is connected with you everywhere – Facebook – Twitter – Instagram – LinkedIn – Quora – maybe on some other social networks too – and yes – she eagerly follows your blogs too…”

“I must be following her too…”

“Sir – Please, Sir – just “unfollow” her – block her out of your online life…”

“I just don’t understand. How does it matter if your wife and I are “friends” on the social media…?”

“If it didn’t matter – I wouldn’t have come all the way here to meet you. Nisha’s online relationship with you is affecting our married life…”

“Relationship…? What “relationship”…? I told you very clearly – I don’t have any “relationship” with your wife – online or offline. Just being “friends” on the social media – and “following” each other – it doesn’t mean anything…”

“Sir – it may not mean anything to you. But – for her – it does mean a lot. Sir – she is your total “fan”. Nisha admires you immensely. Actually – I have started feeling jealous of you…

“Jealous – of me...?

“She is in love with you…”

“Love…? Are you crazy…? I must be more than double her age – maybe even more. How can a young woman fall in love with an “old fogey” senior citizen like me…? Especially when she has such a handsome young husband like you…”

“Sir – I told you, Sir – it is “intellectual love” – she is obsessed with you – she keeps showing me your blog posts, your status uploads, your pictures, your tweets, everything you write and post on the Social Media. She even wants me to become like you – the other day – she told me to start Blogging – and to get more active on the Social Media. …”

“So – why don’t you start…?”

“Sir – I am “outdoor” type – I am not into Blogging and Social Media…”

“See. She is your wife. It is better you talk to her frankly. If you are feeling so insecure about me – why don’t you tell her to “unfriend” and “unfollow” me…?”

“I did, Sir. She won’t listen. In fact – she got angry and told me not to interfere in her online life…”

“Oh…” I said.

To be frank – I really could not understand how our innocent online “friendship” could affect his married life.

But obviously – it was affecting the married life of the young man standing in front of me.

He had come all the way to meet me – just because of this.

I looked at the young man – he was truly a “handsome hulk” – who most girls would swoon over.

But – his wife didn’t seem to care for his good looks and superb physique.  

Maybe – Nisha was a “sapiosexual” who valued “intellect” more than outward “appearance”.  

Our tête-à-tête was interrupted by the arrival of my wife on the scene.

The handsome young man excused himself – while leaving he give me a “beseeching” look.

EPILOGUE

Dear Reader:

As I write this on my laptop – I have opened Nisha’s Facebook Profile on my Smartphone.

Please tell me what I should do.

Should I “unfriend” her on Facebook – “Block” her on Twitter – and “unfollow” and “mute” her everywhere else on the Social Media…?

Should I breakup my online relationship with Nisha…?

Dear Reader – You tell me what to do – and – I will do whatever you say. 

VIKRAM KARVE
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Disclaimer:
1. This story is a fictional spoof, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
2. This story is a work of fiction. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
 
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