Friday, December 2, 2016

Gamophobia (Fear of Marriage)

GAMOPHOBIA
(Fear of Marriage)
Short Fiction Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE

“Why can’t people understand that I do not want to get married…” she said.

“What happened…?” I asked her.

“It’s my mother again – now – she has found a “Boy” for me over here…”

“Here…? In New Zealand…?”

“Yes – last year – when I was on vacation in India – I escaped seeing “Boys” saying that I had decided to settle down permanently in New Zealand – and – I was unwilling to relocate from Auckland – so now – they have found a “Boy” for me out here…”

“Oh…”

“I just don’t understand why my parents are so desperate to get me married…”

“You are 30 now – you are already past what is considered “marriageable age” in India…”

“But – I don’t want to get married – so – how does it matter – whether I am past “marriageable age” or not…?”

“Well – in India – parents feel it is their duty to get their daughters married…”

“That was okay in the past – when girls were not financially independent – but today – things are different – in fact – I am sure I earn much more than most “Boys” of my age…”

“Maybe – your parents feel that now that you are 30 – you should “settle down” in life…”

“But – I have already settled down in life – haven’t I…? I have a good job with excellent career prospects – I have my own house in the best inner city suburb of Auckland – I have my own car – I have everything I need…”

“That may be so – but – probably – your parents feel that you need a husband – and – getting married will complete your life…” 

“Well – I feel “complete” already – so – there is no place for anyone else in my life – I don’t need anyone – I have got everything…”

“What about…?”

“Please – let’s not discuss that – but – let me tell you that I can easily get enough of it to satisfy my needs – whenever I want…”

“I meant companionship…”

“I get plenty of “companionship” at work – in fact – a bit too much – you know the job I do – I have to spend the whole day interacting by people – colleagues, customers, clients – I get so fed up that I just want to be alone at home to enjoy my “self-time”…”

“I meant friendship – friends…”

“Friends…? You are there – aren’t you…? Whenever I want – to relax over a drink – or – go on a drive – or I want to get something off my chest – I call you – and you come – like you have come now…”

“Yes – I am always there for you – but – don’t you want to have more friends...?”

“Actually – out here – one doesn’t need many friends – I like the social culture out here – where they respect your privacy…”

“You never had any friends out here…? Even when you were studying at the University…?”

“Of course I did. But – those days were different – now – I like my solitude…”

“Yes…”

“In fact – now – you are my only friend. I like you because you are the only one who doesn’t indulge in “matchmaking” and try to get me married – like most Indian “Expats” out here try to do – they keep hounding me to get married – searching for suitable “matches” – finding all sorts of “Boys” for me…”

“Well – you can’t blame them – can you…? They may have travelled a long distance from India and migrated and settled down over here – but – their mindset hasn’t changed – though they are physically in a modern country – culturally – in their minds – they still carry old-fashioned Indian values – that’s why they feel that it is odd for a girl to remain unmarried once she crosses 30…”

“Well – I am happy and single – I am living my life to the fullest – on my own terms – and I don’t want anyone worrying about my marriage – not even my parents – and certainly not these Indian “expats” out here…”

“Don’t pay much attention to them – but – remember – that – like your parents – their intentions are good…”

“Well – I don’t care about their intentions – but – they hassle me with all their “matrimonial talk” and comments about my living a single life – that’s why I have dumped everyone – except you – because you are the only one who accepts me as I am. Yes – you are the only one that I consider as my friend – because you don’t have any “good intentions” to end my “spinstership” and get me married…” 

“Hey – your glass is empty – should I get you some more beer…?”

“No – I’ll go home now…”

“Why so early…? It’s Friday night – and only 7 o’clock…”

“I have to go. But – you wait here…”

“Me…? Wait here…?”

“Yes. I want you to speak to the “Boy” – and – you will tell him that I don’t want to get married…”

“What…?”

“Don’t you remember what I told you…? My parents have found a “Boy” for me over here…”

“Is he coming here to meet you...?”

“Yes – I called him here at 8 – for dinner. But now – he can have the “dinner date” with you instead of me…”

“Who is the guy…? Does he live here in Auckland…? Maybe I know him…”

“No. He was working in Christchurch. He took up a job in Auckland only last week. I don’t know what my parents told his parents – and what hopes they raised in him – because – from the way he talked to me on phone – it seems he is taking things for granted. I only hope he hasn’t relocated to Auckland in anticipation of getting married to me – because – if he has fancy ideas – he is going to get the shock of his life when you tell him that I am not interested in marriage …”

“Oh. So – you want me to do your dirty work…”

“Yes. That’s what good friends are for – aren’t they…?”

“But I don’t even know him…”

“Here – I am sending you his picture and name on your mobile phone. Okay – I’ll go now – you enjoy your “dinner-date” with the “Boy” – and – you please call me up in the morning and tell me what happened…”

“Okay. Bye. Take Care…” I said to her.

“Bye…” she said – and she walked towards door of the pub.


EPILOGUE

Next morning – I called her up to tell her that the “mission” had been accomplished.

Then – I called up my mother in India – and I said to my mother: “Ma – you can start looking for a suitable bride for me…”

“Bride…? You want me to search for a bride for you…? What happened to that girl over there in Auckland…? Weren’t you supposed to meet her last evening…?”

“Yes. I met her…”

“What happened…? Did you talk about marriage…? Did you propose to her…?”

“We talked about marriage – but – I didn’t propose to her…”

“Why…? What happened…? Did you have a fight…? Is there some problem with her…? You broke up with her…?”

“No – No – Ma – nothing like that at all – we are still good friends – but – she doesn’t want to get married – that’s all…”

“She doesn’t want to get married to you…? Why…? Why doesn’t she want to get married to you…?”

“It’s not me. She doesn’t want to get married to anyone – she prefers to remain single – that’s all…”

“She wants to remain unmarried…? Strange girl…”

“Ma – you forget about her. I am coming to India for a month during my Christmas Vacations. Please have some good girls lined up for me to see…” I said to my mother.

“Don’t worry – you’ll get the best of girls to select from…” my mother said, “You are a “prime catch” in the marriage market – you are a most eligible bachelor – and that too you are well settled in New Zealand – there will be so many good girls dying for the opportunity to go abroad and settle down in that lovely place…”


AFTERWORD

Well – my “girlfriend” who wanted to remain “happily single” – maybe she had “Gamophobia” (Fear of Marriage).

But – as far as I was concerned – I surely had “Anuptaphobia” (fear of staying single) – yes – I certainly did not want to remain a “chronic bachelor” for all my life. 

VIKRAM KARVE
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