Monday, July 18, 2011

DO YOU TREAT YOUR DAUGHTER-IN-LAW LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER

DO YOU TREAT YOUR DAUGHTER-IN-LAW LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER?

I have observed that most women have double standards in the way they treat their daughters and their daughters-in-law.

My mother too blatantly favours and pampers my sister and gives a raw deal to my wife despite the fact that it is my wife who has always comes to my mother's rescue in times of need and selflessly serves her with love and dedication whenever my mother is in distress; whereas my sister only indulges in sweet talk and lip sympathy and is conspicuous by her absence in times of need, like she has been shirking her responsibility during the last few weeks when my mother is recuperating from a serious accident entailing emergency surgeries and my wife has to toil and look after my bedridden mother all by herself during her entire period of convalescence as my sister has shied away on the flimsiest of excuses. 

Despite this my mother still has a soft corner for my sister who is an expert at gaining sympathy with her smooth talk, sob stories and playing the victim. All she does is call up once a day (for which my mother praises her "concern") whereas my wife's slogging day in and day out is not of much consequence as far as my mother is concerned, since as per conventional thinking my mother feels that it is a daughter-in-law's "duty" to serve her mother-in-law. And, by the way, I realized that this is what everyone else thinks too when I discussed with the matter a few persons. I know that the moment my mother gets well, my sister will turn up to gain my mother's affection by all her superficial emotional antics and the sterling service of my wife will be forgotten (till the next time she is needed).

I can bang my head in despair but my mother won't change, and so also other mothers, so all I can do is to vent my frustration through humour by writing a story. So here is the story, based on a true incident I witnessed a few years ago, titled A ROOM WITH A VARIABLE CLIMATE. Read it and have a laugh.

A ROOM WITH A VARIABLE CLIMATE
A Story of Double Standards
By 
VIKRAM KARVE 

It was a hot and humid summer afternoon in a sea facing flat on Marine Drive in Mumbai and a woman unable to bear the stifling hot climate switched on the air conditioner in the room to cool off a bit.

Her mother-in-law came into the room and the moment she saw her daughter-in-law (whom she barely tolerated) relaxing in cool comfort, she shouted at her sarcastically: “You think you are a Maharani - Just look how you sit in such style with the air conditioner full blast all for yourself. Who is going to pay the huge electricity bill – your father?”

“I’m feeling hot,” the daughter-in-law said. 

“It’s not at all hot – just open the window and let the cool sea breeze in,” the mother-in-law said. “And shut off the air conditioner at once. Sitting in an air conditioned room is not good for your health; you must get used to the climate and learn to adapt with nature!”

Scared of her mother-in-law, the poor woman had no choice but to obey her commands and swelter in the heat.

Suddenly the woman’s sister-in-law (her husband’s sister) arrived on a surprise visit, and the mother-in-law was overjoyed to see her darling daughter, whom she adored, and couldn’t bear to see her suffering in the heat so she turned towards her daughter-in-law and scolded her: “What are you doing just sitting there? Why have you opened those windows to let the hot air in? And why is the air conditioner switched off in this oppressive heat? Close the windows and switch on the air conditioner immediately. Do you want my daughter to suffer a heatstroke?”

And turning to her darling daughter she stroked her hair and lovingly said: “Poor dear, it is so hot here and how you suffer in this terrible heat. You must take care and protect yourself from the harsh vagaries of nature!”

Seething inside but silently complying with her mother-in-law’s instructions, the bewildered daughter-in-law said to herself:“What a miracle indeed? Wonder of wonders! Have you ever seen a room with such a variable climate? Yes, the same room where it blows hot and blows cold at the same time!”

Life is unfair, people are partial, and, whether you like it, or lump it, there is nothing you can do about it.

VIKRAM KARVE
Post a Comment