Very Short Story
TALKING LOUDLY
Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE
__________
PREFACE
__________
A short story is a piece of prose fiction which can be read in a single
sitting.
In today’s technology-driven hectic times – the “span of attention” of
the reader is just a few minutes.
So now – a “single sitting” means just a few minutes.
Dear Reader – let me try to write a very short story that you can read
on your smartphone in a “single sitting” of a few minutes.
__________
TALKING LOUDLY
_________
I don’t know if it is the universal truth – but – I have observed that
most women have a “template” of an ideal husband – and – after marriage – they try
to “mould” their husbands into the “template” of their desired version of “ideal
husband”.
Perhaps – from childhood – a girl builds up an image of a “role model
husband” in her mind – a persona of what she wants her husband to be like.
She creates this mental image of her “role model husband” – maybe – by observing
men – whose qualities she admires – father – uncle – or any man she is impressed
by – and then – she tries to find a husband who matches her “role model”.
If she can’t find a perfect match – she tries to transform her husband
to fit into her “role model”.
First – she tries to do it in a subtle manner.
But – if it doesn’t work – she may resort to “nagging” and try to force the
changes she desires in her husband.
My wife resorts to “nagging” to try and change me to fit her “template”
of ideal husband.
__________
NB:
Since I am a man – I am telling you what I experienced as a husband –
and – I request my women friends to tell us their point of view – if the same
is applicable vice versa.
__________
TALKING LOUDLY
__________
One quality my wife is trying to change in me is to try and make me talk
softly.
And – she hasn’t succeeded so far.
I speak loudly – and – my wife doesn’t like this at all.
She has tried her best to convince me to speak softly – including scaring
me that I will become deaf if I speak loudly – but – I cannot change my habit –
and – I continue to talk loudly – since that is my nature.
Once – we were at a party.
I was in high spirits – enjoying conversation with my friends.
As it is – I talk loudly – and – after imbibing alcohol – I talk even
louder.
I must have had 6 (Large) Pegs of Rum – almost half a bottle – and – with
so much alcohol fueling my veins – I was probably talking animatedly at the top
of my voice.
My wife heard my voice at the other end of the room – so – she walked
across – she tugged my arm – and she took me aside.
“Why are you shouting so loudly…? I can hear your voice at the other end
of the room. Please talk softly…” she scolded me in a soft but stern voice.
“Stop nagging me – let me enjoy the party…” I said to her.
“I feel so embarrassed by your behaviour – can’t you talk softly like
all the others…?” she said to me.
“Others…? Who are you referring to…?” I asked her.
“Look at him – see how refined and polished he is – how softly and
politely he speaks – he is such a well-mannered person…” my wife said –
referring to “Slimy”.
Yes – she was referring to my colleague who was nicknamed “Slimy”.
“Are you talking about that smooth-talking bugger “Slimy” – refined and
polished – my foot…!!! He is a bloody scoundrel…” I said loudly.
“Keep quiet…” my wife said, “he is much better than you…”
“What do you mean “he is much better than me”…?” I said – raising
my voice.
“You are such an uncouth loudmouth…” my wife said, “and he is so cultured
and soft-spoken – a perfect gentleman…”
“You think “Slimy” is a perfect gentleman…? He is the most unscrupulous
bastard I have ever seen. Bloody debauched womanizer…!!! Do you know that he is
having an affair with “XXX”…?” I shouted at the top of my voice.
_________
(I loudly mentioned the name of “XXX” – the married woman with whom “Slimy”
was having an extra-marital affair)
_________
On hearing my words – my wife looked aghast.
“Keep Quiet – Keep Quiet…” my wife said to me sternly in a hushed voice –
and she looked behind my shoulder.
I turned around.
“XXX” was standing right behind me – she looked shocked and unnerved –
shaken out of her wits.
Slimy’s wife also seemed to have heard what I had said – there was an expression
of haplessness on her face.
There was a hush in the entire room – a grotesque silence – everyone
seemed to have heard what I had said.
_______
That night – when we went home – my wife had a big fight with me.
“You are incorrigible…” she said, “I keep telling you to speak softly –
but – you never listen to me. Why did you talk so loudly…? It was so embarrassing
for me. I will never forgive you…”
______
Dear Reader – I am confused.
Which is a more serious “offence” – talking loudly – or – committing adultery…?
______
VIKRAM KARVE
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