PRAISOPHOBIA
(Not to be confused with Prosophobia - the fear of progress)
By
VIKRAM KARVE
I have coined
a new term – “PRAISOPHOBIA”
Praisophobia is the Fear of Praise.
Praisophobia
is the fear that if you praise someone then the person’s behaviour may change
for the worse (or if you praise some thing then something adverse may happen).
Let me give
you an example.
Twenty years
ago, if you asked my wife what was the worst thing she did not like about me,
she would unhesitatingly say that she hated my drinking habit.
Yes, I must
confess that I indeed loved to drink.
I had my first
drink after I joined the Navy in the 1970’s and I started enjoying drinking alcohol
in earnest on my first ship where the wardroom bar was well stocked with the choicest
varieties of alcoholic beverages – wines, spirits, liquors, liqueurs, beers –
you name it and the drink was available. And drinking was quite affordable
since the booze was duty free.
I sampled and
tasted everything and after experiencing all varieties and types of alcoholic
drinks I discovered that I liked two brands: a Blended Scotch Whisky called
Chivas Regal (which I drank on board) and an Indian Dark Rum called Hercules
XXX Rum (which I drank ashore).
(We did not
get duty-free liquor ashore and after developing a taste for Scotch Whisky I
found the Indian Whiskies of those days quite rough, whereas Indian Dark Rum
was probably the best in the world – the brands Hercules, Sea Pirate and Old
Monk were good)
Hey, I am
digressing, so let me get to the point.
As I told you,
my wife hated my drinking.
In contrast, I
loved drinking so much that I used to eagerly wait for sunset so that I could
pour my first peg of the day.
(As a rule I
avoided drinking in daytime since I did not enjoy it)
I drank quite regularly,
almost every day, and I am sure my wife was very worried that I may become an
alcoholic.
I am sure she
prayed that I should stop drinking alcohol.
Probably, my
drinking was the biggest problem in her life.
Then, all of a
sudden, one day I stopped drinking – yes, I quit drinking alcohol forever.
This happened
more than 10 years ago and since then I have remained a teetotaller.
I thought that
my wife would be very happy that I had stopped drinking.
I thought that
my wife would be filled with joy that her prayers had been answered and that
her alcohol loving husband had turned a new leaf and was living a life of
temperance and sobriety.
In fact, I
thought that she would be full of praise for me.
However, since
the day I quit drinking, my wife has never praised me even once for having the
resolve and willpower to free myself from the clutches of alcohol which I loved
so dearly.
I thought that
for an alcohol lover like me to have given up drinking was a commendable act
deserving of the highest praise, especially from my wife who was most affected
by my drinking habit.
Yet, my wife
has never uttered a word of praise for my good deed, either in private or in
public.
The reason –
PRAISOPHOBIA.
My wife is
afraid that if she praises me I may start drinking again.
So Dear
Reader, the moral of the story is this:
If you do a
praiseworthy deed and someone does not praise you, do not think that those
persons are unappreciative – maybe they suffer from Praisophobia
Think about
it. Do you suffer from Praisophobia? Or do you know someone who is
praisophobic?
VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
Did you like reading this article?
I am sure you will like all the 27 stories in my book COCKTAIL an anthology of Short Fiction.
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
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http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925
Copyright © Vikram Karve
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
Did you like reading this article?
I am sure you will like all the 27 stories in my book COCKTAIL an anthology of Short Fiction.
To order your COCKTAIL please click any of the links below:
http://www.flipkart.com/cocktail-vikram-karve-short-stories-book-81910
http://www.indiaplaza.in/cocktail-vikram-karve/books/9788191091847.htm
http://www.apkpublishers.com/books/short-stories/cocktail-by-vikram-ka
COCKTAIL ebook
If you prefer reading ebooks on Kindle or your ebook reader, please order Cocktail E-book by clicking the links below:
AMAZON
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MGERZ6
SMASHWORDS
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/87925
Foodie Book: Appetite for a Stroll
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9 mr2o
About Vikram Karve
A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.
Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramwamankarve@gmail.com
If your are a Foodie you will like my book of Food Adventures APPETITE FOR A STROLL. Do order a copy from FLIPKART:
http://www.flipkart.com/appetite-stroll-vikram-karve/8190690094-gw23f9
About Vikram Karve
A creative person with a zest for life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer and blogger. Educated at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School Pune, Vikram has published two books: COCKTAIL a collection of fiction short stories about relationships (2011) and APPETITE FOR A STROLL a book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel and a book of vignettes and an anthology of short fiction. An avid blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories and creative non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories and self help in magazines and published a large number of professional and academic research papers in journals and edited in-house journals and magazines for many years, before the advent of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse - his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative thoughts.
Vikram Karve Academic and Creative Writing Journal: http://karvediat.blogspot.com
Professional Profile Vikram Karve: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Vikram Karve Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/vikramkarve
Vikram Karve Creative Writing Blog: http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/posts.htm
Email: vikramwamankarve@gmail.com
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
The opposite of PRAISOPHOBIA is PRAISOMANIA and I am sure you have seen many such praisomaniac types - who keep praising even when it is not justified.
ReplyDeleteRegards
Vikram Karve
Enjoyed reading it sir :)
ReplyDeletegreat article sir.
ReplyDeleteRaj Shetty Ex-Lt Cdr
Dear Vikram,I do not know how, but that is exactly my story.
ReplyDeleteI served 22 years as a commissioned officer ,during my tenure IN decorated me with NM and VSM,I continued drinking XXX,joined a private Airline ,never got BA +,
Despite Two Engine Flame out in flight and perfect handling and various other serious situations,never never got any appreciation,do not how could a Company would suffer from PRAISOPHOBIA.
Article written in simple words but very thought full and interesting.
Keep writing.
Dear VC Pandey Sir,
ReplyDeleteI fully empathize with you, Sir. I too have seen many in the navy and in the civilian world too having praisophobia - they bullshit at the first opportunity but are very reluctant to acknowledge and praise good deeds and achievements.
Thank you for your comments.
Do read my blogs and give us your views.
Regards
Vikram
@ SSB Crack and Raj Shetty - Thanks. I am glad you liked the post
ReplyDelete