Thursday, August 5, 2021

Eyebrows - Part 3

EYEBROWS : Part 3

Story by VIKRAM KARVE 

_______

Continued from EYEBROWS PART 2 

http://karvediat.blogspot.com/2021/07/eyebrows-part-2.html 

_______

PART 3

Eyebrow Watching

______

EYEBROW WATCHING

To be honest – before this encounter with my Boss’s Wife – I had never noticed eyebrows.

Earlier – whenever I saw a beautiful woman – I would admire her face, her eyes, her nose, her lips, her cheeks, her complexion, her neck, her hair, her legs, her cleavage, her derriere, her …  – well – I will leave the rest to your imagination.

Let me just say that I would admire a woman’s entire body – but – I don’t recall admiring eyebrows.

Now – after the tête-à-tête with my Boss’s Wife – whenever I saw a beautiful woman – I would first look at her eyebrows.

You must have heard of Birdwatching as a hobby.

In Birdwatching – you observe actual birds in their natural surroundings.

You may have also indulged in “Birdwatching” – in your younger days.

In “Birdwatching” – you “watch” two-legged “birds” on streets, in workplaces etc. in urban surroundings.

_______

Apropos the second type of “Birdwatching” – there are three styles of “Birdwatching”:

1. You “watch” the entire “Bird” (like a GP or Physician looks after your entire body)

2. You can become a “Specialist” – and like “Specialists” do – you can “specialize” in “watching” a certain part of the “Bird” – like face reading, navel gazing, leg admiring etc. etc. etc. – for example.

3. You can become a “Super-Specialist” – and narrow down your focus.

_______

“Eyebrow Watching” is a “super-specialization” of “birdwatching” – instead of “watching” the entire “bird” – or observing the entire face – you focus your attention on “eyebrows” only.

I have derived great pleasure in this hobby of “eyebrow watching” – and – I will always be grateful to my Boss’s Wife who first drew my attention to the beauty and significance of eyebrows.

Now – to come back to the story – I developed a deep curious interest in eyebrows.

So – whenever I met people – I started observing their eyebrows.

_______

As I started observing various types of human “eyebrows” – I was fascinated by this rather “insignificant” part of human “anatomy”.

Dear Reader – this story happened 45 years ago in the 1970’s – when internet and search engines like Google did not exist – and – the only source of information was books.

So – one evening – I walked down from my ship to my favourite bookstore in Fort, Mumbai – and – I asked the owner of the book shop:

“Have you got a book on eyebrows…?”

The bookshop owner gave me a curious look and said:

“Eyebrows…? We may not have a book on “eyebrows” – but – we do have a good book on “Face Reading” – it may have a section of “Eyebrows” – let me see…”

He searched the shelves and pulled out a book on FACE READING.

I eagerly opened the book – yes – it had a few pages on “eyebrows” – with sketches too.

I bought the book and rushed back to my ship – eager to read it.

The first thing I learnt was that the art of face reading was called physiognomy – but – at that moment – I wasn’t quite interested in the rest of the face – so – I immediately went to the pages on “eyebrows”.

I started using my newfound knowledge immediately – and – I started observing “eyebrows”.

“Why are you looking so deep into my eyes…? Are you trying to seduce me…?” a woman said to me.

“I am not looking at your eyes – I am looking at your eyebrows…” I said to her.

“What…? Are you a weirdo or something…? Staring at eyebrows…!!!” she said with disgust – and – she angrily walked away.

What an irony – when I was looking deep into the eyes of my Boss’s Wife – she thought I was looking at her eyebrows – and now – this woman – I was looking at her eyebrows – and she thought I was looking deep into her eyes – trying to seduce her.

At a party – I observed “Doc” talking to a woman for a long time – and – I said to him:

“You are on the right track – bash on regardless…”

“Doc” looked at me – confused – and he said to me:

“What do you mean…?”

“The woman you were talking to – did you notice her lush “eyebrows” – how “bushy” her eyebrows were…?” I said to “Doc”.

“What are you trying to say…?” he said, looking curious.

“Weren’t you trying to seduce her…? You are spot on – I think you will be successful in seducing her…” I said to him.

“Seduce her…? She is a colleague – and what the hell have her eyebrows got to do with it…?” he said.

“The theory says that if you want to seduce a woman – try with a woman who has thick and bushy eyebrows…” I said to “Doc”.

“And where did you read this bloody theory…?” he said, suspiciously.

“I have got a book on face reading – physiognomy – in your medical lingo – and – it is written there that bushy eyebrows show a high sex drive – so – if you want to seduce a woman – try with a woman who has thick and bushy eyebrows…” I said to “Doc”.

“Don’t bullshit…” “Doc” said, “a woman can thicken her eyebrows with make-up – or even cosmetic surgery – an eyebrow transplant…”

“I was talking about natural eyebrows – maybe some women thicken their eyebrows artificially because they want to attract men – it is a well-known fact that women with thicker eyebrows look more attractive to me…”

“Well – I didn’t know that…!!!” “Doc” said, “where have you suddenly acquired all this “eyebrow knowledge”…?”

“I told you that I bought a book on “face reading”…” I said, “there is a full section on “eyebrows”…”

“Your Boss’s Wife has driven you crazy – both of you are obsessed with eyebrows – she has “eyebrow dysmorphophobia” – and you have developed a bloody “fetish” for eyebrows…” “Doc” said to me.

When he mentioned my Boss’s Wife – I suddenly remembered that “Doc” had promised to give her details of a cosmetic surgeon to “correct” her eyebrows – so – I asked him:

“Hey – did you give my Boss’s Wife the contact details of your Cosmetic Surgeon friend…?”

“Yes – I gave her his phone number at the beginning of the party…” he said.

Indeed – “Doc” had given my Boss’s Wife the Cosmetic Surgeon’s phone number – because – a few days later – my Boss asked me to call the “Doc” to his cabin – and – he started shouting at “Doc”:

“Why the hell did you give my wife that Cosmetic Surgeon’s phone number…? Do you know how much it is going to cost me…?”

“Sir – she asked if I knew any good Cosmetic Surgeon…” “Doc” said, sheepishly.

“And you…!” my Boss looked at me and said, “what the hell did you tell my wife…?”

“Sir – I was looking at her – but she thought I was looking at her eyebrows…” I said, feeling awkward.

“I don’t know why – but ever since we got married – she keeps thinking that something is wrong with her eyebrows…” my Boss said.

“Sir – actually – your wife has got perfect eyebrows – “eyebrows on fleek” as they are called - absolutely flawless…” I said to my Boss, “there is nothing wrong with her eyebrows – she has got BDD – Body Dysmorphic Disorder – I think she needs to consult a psychiatrist…”

“You bloody idiots…” my Boss shouted, “first – you want to send my wife to a cosmetic surgeon – and now – are you telling me that my wife is a mental case…? You two just get out of my sight – and keep away from my wife…”

“Doc” and I – we both beat a hasty retreat.

Well – Dear Reader- my Boss’s Wife indeed had BDD – or specifically “Eyebrow BDD” – because – even after a series of treatments – an eyebrow transplant – eyebrow lift – etc. etc. etc. – her obsession with her eyebrows continued.

I don’t know whether my Boss took her for psychiatric treatment or not – because soon – I was transferred from this ship to another ship.

But before I conclude this part of the story – let me tell you what happened at my farewell party on this ship.

As a courtesy – my Captain’s wife came to talk to me – and – during the conversation – I lavishly praised her eyebrows:

“Ma’am – you have lovely eyebrows – soft rounded eyebrows – perfect for your heart shaped face – and the shape of your beautiful eyebrows indicate that you are a very kind and compassionate person and you always care for other people’s needs…”

“Really…? You are so nice…” she said to me with an affectionate look – and – she actually started blushing – just imagine – she was probably more than double my age.

Next morning – I reported to the Captain before leaving the ship.

“Sir – there is one thing I always wanted to tell you…” I said to him.

“Shoot…” he said, in his characteristic style.

“Sir – your eyebrows – you have got a unibrow – a monobrow – it is a sign of good luck and signifies virility and fertility…” I said to him.

I thought he would be happy on hearing this – but – he seemed to be angry.

“You get out of here before I declare you a bloody “psycho”…” the Captain shouted at me, “last night – my wife said that you told her some mumbo jumbo about eyebrows – and now – you are trying to bullshit me…!!!”

I saluted him and beat a hasty retreat.

______ 

EPILOGUE

Since those days – I have derived great pleasure in this hobby of “eyebrow watching” – and – I will always be grateful to my Boss’s Wife who first drew my attention to the beauty and significance of eyebrows.

As far as Dysmorphophobia aka Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is concerned – I feel that Social Media may proliferate BDD – and – body dysmorphic tendencies may rise – as many young people may become preoccupied with looking good in the photos they upload – especially “selfies” – and now – in these COVID times – with masks covering the nose and lips – good eyebrows may attain prominence.

During the long COVID Lockdown – with beauty parlours closed – eyebrows started attaining their natural shape – and you could make out who really had good eyebrows.

“Eyebrow Watching” has certainly become interesting nowadays – with “mask up” protocol highlighting the prominence of eyes and eyebrows and reducing the importance of nose and lips – there has been a paradigm shift in the definition of beauty – especially facial beauty.

_______

MORAL OF THE STORY

If – after reading this story – you start observing eyebrows – offline and online – I will feel that my story has succeeded.

Offline – in real life – look at people – masks cover lips and nose – not eyebrows.

Online – on the Social Media – look at Profile Pictures and Selfies – observed eyebrows.

When you look into the mirror – observe your own eyebrows.

And then – if you get hooked to “Eyebrow Watching” – you can always “Google” – and learn all you want to know about “Eyebrows”.

_______

Dear Reader – Happy “Eyebrow Watching”

_______

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.


Disclaimer:
This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:
No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.
Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Continued from Eyebrows Part 1 url: http://karvediat.blogspot.com/2021/07/eyebrows.html 
     
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.
 

No comments:

Post a Comment

I Write and I Blog because I want to say something.
I also want to hear what you have to say, especially about what I have written.
Please Comment.
I would love to hear your views.
I will greatly appreciate and welcome to your Feedback.